Nimble Vagrant

Coffee Bay to Hole in the Wall - On foot

2010-06-11T05:49:00.000-07:00

Coffee Bay is one of the destinations on the Wild Coast that we had decided to skip. Both the backpackers there got pretty bad reviews; unless you are going there to booze it up - stay away.

But. We heard from a couple of people that the hike along the coast to the famous Hole in the Wall is pretty awesome.

So. We switched from going to Port St Johns to Coffee Bay and took our luck with the Coffee Shack backpackers.

Getting to Coffee Bay is pretty cool. We took the shuttle from the Mthatha petrol station to Coffee Bay. That area of the Transkei is pretty awesome. I am jealous of Hardy, a TDA rider, that rode along there after the tour on his way to Pretoria. Lots of hills, valleys, turns and forests. Also plenty of poor villages spread for ages across the hills. Its not Ethiopia - not even close - but it is the poorest I've seen in South Africa.

The Coffee Shack was pretty much what I expected. Compared to Buccaneers at Cintsa it is an absolute dump. The reviews are spot on. If you don't drink, stay somewhere else. We stayed across the river in the "quiet" area. We still got treated to the full show: doped up fools boning in the bathrooms, puking in the morning and rolling a contemplative joint to work out why being an idiot is so hard work.

On the other hand, the hike itself is awesome. The trail winds right along the sea which means that it is pretty exposed. If you are afraid of heights prepare to spend a bit of time managing it by looking at your feet. If you do look up you'll see plenty though. We saw whales breaching and a huge pod of dolphins. The landscape itself is pretty rugged and barren. It feels pretty remote, but there are a lot of mobile towers and so on around, so I guess that help wouldn't be too far away.

Here is the route that we took. Forgot to start it and the phone went flat just before we got back to White Clay, so don't plan a mission based on this or anything.

Hole in the Wall (Partial) at EveryTrail

We weren't sure how far away Hole in the Wall was, and we'd been told that there was nothing around. So we were pretty surprised to walk past a small town and then see it. We were so surprised that it took us a while to work out that we were actually at Hole in the Wall and not some other thing. It didn't help that we were there at high tide, which makes the hole look a lot smaller.

We took a slightly different route on the way back in places. A beach that we'd powered across had been covered by the tide so we had to struggle up an extra steep hill. On the other hand, we knew which of the other trails to take when there were a bunch of choices.

If you can arrange it, stop at the White Clay Guesthouse on the way back. It has great fish and you can look at the waves smashing themselves in to the cliffs you just skirted.

Dan becomes a "backpacker"

2010-06-08T02:38:00.000-07:00

[Dan's Note: A guest blog from Steph.] As we travelled across Africa on our bicycles, we were always just short of the luxuries that we wished we had, sometimes hot water, sometimes a dry place to sleep and always a bed. As the trip moved away from the “desert camps and bush camps” of Northern Africa and we were often close to or around hotels, a certain group of the riders would Always get a hotel room. Dan was one of those riders. These riders would talk to each other days before the arrival of one of these towns, deciding who would ride faster to obtain the precious commodity of a hotel room (with 60+ riders, not everyone would get a room, not even close). Near the end of the trip the commodity actually became a bone of contention within the group as riders would select another rider to zoom ahead on the truck to secure the rooms for themselves and a select group of other riders before the “actual riders” made it. Being a professional wilderness guide myself, I prefer to live in my little tent. I also prefer the non- cookie cutter style of travel offered by backpacking across countries and living in hostels as opposed to fancy Protea, or Hilton hotels. When Dan and I began our trip across South Africa once the biking was over I proposed this style of travel to him. Dan having never done it before, was very hesitant and not overly excited about the idea, but agreed. There were some conditions that Dan laid down in the beginning. These were the conditions: 1.We would never stay in “Dorms” 2. We would get Double en-suite rooms…. (Hmmm not really backpacking I thought) but a good initiation into the world of backpacking that I have been doing for years. When Dan suggested that we should rent a car to drive up the wild coast, I suggested the Baz Bus, a backpacker hop-on hop-off bus that drives up the coast. He was less than thrilled with this idea but agreed. From day one the Baz bus was full of young intrepid backpackers, and us, Dan slowly learning the ropes of meeting and greeting travelers as they got on the bus. I love people and interacting with strangers and hearing people’s stories, Dan is more of an introvert sitting on the bus with his headphones on secretly hoping no one will talk to him. First stop: Wilderness, South Africa where Dan and I agreed that Dan would have his last “fancy hotel” a small little guest house called Moontide, where we stayed in a fancy little treehouse. I also decided this would be a good trip to teach Dan about the joys of hiking, running and maybe scuba diving, three of my favorite things… He wanted to show me about computer coding (his favorite thing) however my brain is not smart enough for that. Moving on from there in the Baz bus we went to a place called Plettenberg Bay, where we stayed in a hostel which was pretty empty and stayed in a double en-suite which seemed to be more like a cheap motel than a hostel to me. At this hostel a British couple was in the kitchen at the same time as us wanting to cook on the stove. As we all started cooking the fuse blew and we were unable to all cook at the same time. I told the british couple to go ahead and cook and we would cook later, all the time Dan was standing (looking very scary and angry with his arms crossed by the fridge). The woman looked at me and then Dan and was like “oh that’s okay you go ahead” I think she was frightened by Dan’s look. I said “no really go ahead”, just as Dan stormed out of the kitchen to watch TV. I don’t think he really cared but he didn’t realize how scary he was looking. In the aftermath I stayed behind to chat to the couple to make sure they didn’t think we were mad. When I told Dan later, we had a good laugh. Next we zoomed along on the Baz bus to Storms River. Here, Dan was introduced to the “hippie world of the backpacking scene”. We had a really cool theme room double en-suite in the hostel. The owner was a real long-haired crazy dude who talked a lot. We said we would have dinner that night at the hostel as we arrived late. We got our pizza they made us and we chose to sit at the bar. The owner then came and talked some serious crazy talk to us for over an hour. It was Dan’s birthday so I felt badly that we were being held captive by this crazy hostel owner, as I was trying to endear Dan to liking backpacking, not getting them to hate it. Finally there was a small window of opportunity to get away so Dan and I escaped with out saying any more. We had one more night at this hostel where we ate at a restaurant for dinner and tried to avoid the strange environment of the empty hostel (guests) and a lot of hippie workers? Or whoever they were. Next was the best yet. We travelled on the Baz bus to Port Elizabeth (Nelson Mandela Bay) to arrive very late (around 10pm) after the Baz bus picked us up over an hour late. When we arrived at the hostel, the entire Baz bus was also getting off at the hostel. I should also mention now that while I was trying to teach Dan about hostel, backpacking we were not actually travelling like backpackers. We (Read: I) have A LOT of luggage. This is because when you come on a trip to bike across Africa, you never think that at the end of it, it would be really enjoyable to backpack across South Africa, so you don’t lighten your load. Dan mailed one of his whole bags back to Australia, but since I will need a lot of the things in my bag after this trip, I have EVERYTHING… Bike parts, tires, sleeping bag, bike clothes etc. etc. It makes getting in and out of the hostels and Baz bus a bit of a gong show. So we get off at the hostel and we are in a line up to get into the hostel. When we finally make it to the front we find out that they thought when we booked a double en-suite, that we actually wanted a single room and Alas, they were now out. She said this is what you booked… Dan looked really scary. I said “Well it is too late to go somewhere else, so we have to figure something out”. I said to Dan, maybe you should stay in the single and I will stay in the dorm. Dan said, no I will just stay in the dorm too. After a lot of deliberation about what to do, they decided the dorm was the option. She took us to show us. As we approached the dorm we could see the entire Baz bus, girls and guys were in the dorm, the last two beds (for Dan and I ) were on the top bunk of two of the bunk beds. This was like the Hostel worst nightmare scenario. I peeked over at Dan to see what he was thinking. I am not sure if he looked more like he was going to cry or freak out. So I said, maybe you should just stay in the single. He said that was what he was going to do. Yikes. This had quickly turned from slow integration into backpacking into advance levels. So Dan stayed in the single and I stayed in the Dorm. Funny enough we both slept better than we have on the entire holiday thus far. Today, the man that owned the hostel was trying to make things better. He couldn’t get a double but he gave us a private room with four twin beds. He also offered free internet, free beer (but since Dan said we don’t drink he gave us cokes) and then he said what else can I do to make you less angry (obviously this was directed at Dan, not me) Dan said I want to take the Jaffle Iron next door- This is the story of this man’s heart, all you need to make him happy is a Jaffle iron. So that is where we stand now. Who knows what will happen next on this backpacking odyssey… Luckily all the hostels were full for Durban and (sigh) all Dan could find for us to stay in Durban due to the World Cup was a Hilton. [Dan's Note: the poor guy even offered to refund my money. It just goes to show that the secret to good customer service is being a brooding monster. Take note simpering whiners.] I don’t know if Dan will ever backpack again, but now he has “experienced” life as a backpacker, he might even win a EFI- backpackers award for South Africa.

The End of Something

2010-05-23T02:10:00.000-07:00

So. The TDA is done and dusted. After four months, it seems incredible to be in Cape Town.

A week after the race finished I am still adjusting. Only now am I starting to realise that it is over. 120 days might not seem like a long time in the scheme of things, but it is more than enough to be habit forming. Most of me still expects to be getting on the bike tomorrow. To have my food cooked by someone tomorrow. To be in a tent tomorrow. To be drinking a litre of thick, sweet coffee tomorrow. To be seeing all the TDA people tomorrow.

But its not going to be like that.

The strangest thing is how quickly the elation wears off. There was maybe five minutes at the final lunch where I realised that I was going to keep EFI - I didn't have to worry about keeping it anymore. After that EFI seemed like a pretty hollow achievement. I see the photos from the expedition riders and it seems like they experienced so much more of the tour than I did. Don't get me wrong though. I wouldn't have wanted to do the tour without trying for EFI and I would have been pretty disappointed to lose it through accident or by giving up.

Cape Town is a pretty nice place to be having TDA withdrawals. The Waterfront has everything that you could need. This is me enjoying (and destroying) a platter for two at a German restaurant.

I look pretty healthy in this photo. Turns out that I am pretty weak though. Tabata Protocol at the gym nearly killed me and I can't lift anything to save my life.

Not having a protective layer of blubber means that I started to feel the cold a lot. Even though I am not super skinny like I was in the depths of sickess (85kg). On the first day in South Africa it was bitterly cold and I had no warm gear with me at all. Luckily, we stopped in a petrol station / cafe / supermarket / crystal shop / second hand emporium. I found a riding coat perfectly suited to cycling long distances.

Lightweight, waterproof, fashionable. All these things are hard to find in a second hand coat. I am also wearing a loaner helmet. I couldn't find my helmet at the start of the day. I have a system that means that my helmet should always be on my head or in my locker. On the rest day before this, I went for a ride to find some money then lost my helmet. Turns out that I just carefully packed it in my spares bag. The system broke down.

Final picture. Me after having jumped out of a perfectly good (well pretty banged up really) plane. Strangely, not nearly as scary as going up a ladder.

Sossusvlei, Namibia to Felix Unite, Namibia

2010-05-09T07:38:00.001-07:00

Day One - Sossusvlei to Betta

Distance: 137.14km

Ride time: 6:27

Climb: 887m

This morning was a pretty hard section. There were a couple of 5km or so 1-2% long climbs. Those combined with the bad sections of road were tiring. Having another four big days of this stuff to go is a bit daunting. My hopes of the last two weeks being a cakewalk have totally evaporated. We have hundreds of kilometres of dirt and TWO mando days in the next four days. Not going to be easy.

Riding meeting today was good. I got my plate for winning the stage into Sossusvlei. Hooray. Actually, it was pretty good. Maybe I will become addicted to not being a mediocre rider.

Day Two - Betta to Some Lodge with Chocolate Cake

Distance: 152.93km

Ride time: 7:20

Climb: 942m

First mando day of this stretch. We did a bunch of climbing before lunch. I couldn't get my heart rate up at all and really suffered. Grinding it out. For a lot of the climb, I could see the same rider in front of me. Normally, I can reel that guy in easy. Especially on the hills. Today I had nothing to use to even catch him. Let alone keep him back once I passed him.

Surprisingly, a lot of people were still there at lunch when I turned up. All my experience at lunching quickly was handy. I jumped back on my bike… wait a minute. I didn't jump back on. When I got into lunch, I couldn't unclip my right foot so I just unstrapped my shoe and walked around in my sock. When I went to get back on I tried keeping my left foot on the right hand side of my bike and re-strapping my right foot. This left me in a pretty precarious position. I couldn't swing my left leg over, get going and steer around the other bikes on the ground. Luckily, Canadian Dave was there to help out. He held my saddle while I got going, at the same time that Gerald cleared the bikes for me. Thanks guys!

After lunch, the day got a lot better. There were a few me climbs out of lunch but after that it was a -1% or -2% grade all the way to camp. Plus, the gravel road got much, much better. By the end, it was basically like riding on a paved road. I even saw their grader out cleaning up the road. Namibia seems to be really serious about maintaining this road. I guess it is because a lot of the overlander trucks use it. Every day we see a couple of those tin cans packed to the brim with tourists. I can't imagine what it would be like to be stuck in one of those for endless days. Especially since they are full of people. On the bike, you have a bit of freedom. Like, you can stop and take an emergency break when you need it. Plus, you can ride by yourself if you need some time away. Maybe overlanding appeals to a whole different type of human. One that likes other peoples' body heat and second hand air.

The best bit of the day was the lodge that we stayed at. Delicious homemade food - including ice cream - at really low prices. The milk tart (custard tart) was good, but the chocolate cake with coffee ice cream and chocolate liqueur was awesome.

Day Three - Some Lodge to Seeheim Hotel

Distance: 126.07km

Ride time: 7:24

Climb: 351m

An easy day today. A short distance plus 90km of pavement made for an untaxing day. At the end of the 30km dirt section was the town of Bethane. There was a pretty awesome coffee shop there. I had a couple of cheese toasties and a few cups of coffee. A pretty nice way to start the day. It turned out to be a long day though. 7+ hours.

The camp tonight is strange. Seeheim seems to be just a small collection of buildings near a railway station. And the railway station seems to be used only for cattle. There is one crush and a loading ramp. Not in use today. But the hotel for this town is pretty amazing. Multi-storied, turret, thatch roof. Pretty cool. So out of place though - I can't imagine why it is here. If I wasn't feeling so strangely tired I would ask the owner.

Day Four - Seeheim Hotel to Hobas Camp at Fish River Canyon

Distance: 108.9km

Ride time: 3:43

Climb: 481m

Another short day. I dunno why, but I felt like pushing it out a bit. I'd left it until nearly everyone else had left before I set off. Straight out of camp there was a fairly steep climb and my heart rate went straight up to 160. It didn't come back down for around 20km. I was hauling along ok, going past people, but I was definitely feeling it, so I had to wind it down a bit.

By the time I was getting close to lunch I had passed most other riders. I could see a bunch of riders in the distance though and wasn't really making up much ground. Stuart still hadn't caught up to me yet though, so I pushed it out a little bit more. When I rolled through lunch, I saw Sunil and Marcel sitting there. There was still one more rider in the distance though, so I didn't stop and kept on going.

At the 76km turn I caught up with Tim. I still hadn't seen Jethro though, so I figured I had to crank up the Slayer and push even more. The turn had swung us out of the tail wind and into a cross wind, so things also got a lot less pleasant. Every 1km I had to stand up and mash a bit to loosen my back. I also snuck a look behind to see if Stuart was gaining on me. I could see a dark blur back there but I couldn't tell who it was or whether they were closing. I figured that there wasn't too much point looking back there. Could I ride any faster than I was now? No.

Around 10km out, I heard a voice coming in over Slayer. I turned around and found out that the dark blur was Jenn, and she was calling my name. She had found out that she had unexpectedly come into the front of the pack as well. We both kept on pushing, not with any expectations, but just to see if we could. At 100km I dropped my bottle. I thought about stopping to get it but decided I had to keep going. Top of the last hill, I dropped my chain and had to get off and fix it. I looked back and saw another 2 dark blurs about a kilometre of two behind.

Jenn and I dropped down into camp. A couple of camp staff pointed us in the right direction and we checked in. I just had enough time to win the stage.

Just kidding. The locals pointed us in the wrong direction. They were standing in front of the trailer with the check-in machine on it. We rode off into the park looking for the trailer. When I got to the edge I realised that we'd been given a bum steer. "FUCK" I yelled and turned around. I rode back looking for the truck. Rode to the truck and found that the scanner was on the trailer was back up the rode. I threw my bike over my shoulder (not sure why, I guess I was pretty angry) and ran back to the trailer. I saw that Stuart was checking in already - I'd wasted whatever lead that I had fucking around looking for the trailer. Stuart hadn't realised what was going on. He asked if I was angry that he'd checked in. "No. I'm angry at the TDA", I said and booted my helmet across the camp ground.

By then, it was just after 10 am, so I decided to have some breakfast beers.

13 beers later, I went to see the Fish River Canyon. Surprisingly, the only effect I felt from the beers was that my legs were a bit wobbly.

And that was how the day was.

Day Five - Fish River Canyon to Felix Unite

Distance: 178.90km

Ride time: 6:53

Climb: 1235m

Second mando day of the stretch. Some might think that I had set myself up for failure by drinking 13 beers the day before. I felt fine though. Not fine enough to ride fast, but fine enough to finish the day.

It was a pretty strange day. There were two super long climbs after lunch with super long descents afterwards. The only downside was that the second descent had a massive headwind. Even on a -4% grade, it took effort to get above 30km/h.

Two notable things about the day:

1. Adam and I had our sprint. Adam outsmarted me and won.

2. Tony and I thought that we had taken a wrong turn so we turned around at 178km. Turns out that we should have kept going over one more hill. Instead we rode some extra kilometres.

And that was that.

Instead of a picture of the Fish River Canyon or Namib Desert (which you can get off Googles), here is a picture of me, sitting in a tent because someone started to take it down because I was taking too long to get ready in the morning. Safe for work: I am wearing pants.

Windhoek, Namibia to Sossusvlei, Namibia

2010-05-09T07:36:00.000-07:00

Day One - Windhoek to Horse Farm

Distance: 113.6km

Ride time: 5:01

Climb: 1085m

Descent: 1000m

There is a definite sense of the end times about the TDA now. With only two rest days and a thousand or so kilometres to go, it sure feels like I am basically done. I guess that this would be the classic way to get myself into a terrible pickle - especially since this Nambian section is meant to be quite hard.

Our route is going to take us south west out of Windhoek to Sossusvlei and from there down to the border of South Africa. Seven days riding; three before Sossusvlei and four afterwards.

So far, the riding has been ok. This morning we had 11km of paved road out of Windhoek before starting on the dirt. Unlike Northern Kenya, Tanzania and Dindir, the road we are riding is actually well maintained. Many of the roads around Yass back home are worse. There are some sketchy parts. On some of the descents, it was all to easy to get stuck on an unfavourable line. It never feels comfortable to be heading towards a big sandy patch knowing that you can't change lines without risking the front wheel digging in.

At the transition between the pavement and the dirt, Gerald had organised a group photo for the EFIers. Groups of us stopped and held up the 10000km sign. Apparently we smashed through that distance somewhere around Windhoek. We've come a long way, but it still feels a little like tempting fate to take an EFI photo so early. It was really neat of Gerald to organise it though. Something to remember for sure.

I'm not sure if we are in the Namib Desert now. Today we seemed to be climbing up to some sort of pass between Windhoek and the coast. Lots of hills to climb, which is a nice change from Botswana. Apparently when we drop down to the lower plateau tomorrow we will be able to Russia / my house / half of Namibia.

Day Two - Horse Camp to Solitaire

Distance: 122km

Ride Time: 5:50

Climb: 630m

Descent: 1323m

So. This Namib Desert thing. It is a desert. There are signs up in the Horse Camp bathrooms: "Namibia is a dry country. Adapt". Only thing is, its been raining massively since we turned up.

Late yesterday afternoon we could see the thunderclouds gathering on the far horizon. During the night it rained so hard that it was coming up under the fly and through the mesh of the tent.

In the morning, the thunderclouds lined the horizon towards which we were going to ride. It actually rained in camp for about 30 seconds during breakfast. This caused a bunch of riders to make a beeline for the lunch truck. It was kind of funny watching how fast they got their bikes up on the truck.

It looked like it was going to be a day of epic proportions. The hills here are exposed rocks with small thorn bushes growing on them. I felt like all it needed was a small Mexican boy pointing towards the jagged hills saying "There is a storm coming". The ride to lunch was all riding towards, up and through the hills.

On the way, I saw a dead snake. Its tail was all mashed up, so I decided to put it in a ziplock baggie for the ultimate prank. I threw a rock at it to make sure it was dead. Then I stepped towards it, hand outstretched, to pick it up. And the snake moved. It seemed like the snake wasn't quite dead yet. Suddenly, my practical joke had taken on a whole new dimension. I decided that I didn't want to die for the sake of comedy and jumped back on my bike to ride away. A little ways down the road I started to think that I should have just pinned its head with a forked stick and stabbed it in the brain with my pen knife. That was when I decided that I had become a crazy man and should think a little bit harder about things when I have been riding for a while.

After lunch, we had an unexpected highlight of the tour. Really, it was one of the best rides of the whole trip. A crazy 600m drop down to the next plateau. At times there were -18% drops and 16% climbs. Some of the road had been paved. Not tarmaced, paved with pavers. From the very top, it didn't look like very much - just a drop down with a good view. Only 100m down the road though, I could see the way the road wound down the side of the hills and got pretty excited.

After the drop, it was a bit of a grind to camp. Hail, big headwinds, rain and sand. The lunch truck brigade found this too unpleasant and pulled into a rest house on the way then got a lift the rest of the way to camp.

Day Three - Solitare to Sossusvlei

Although we had rain overnight and some sprinkles in the morning, we could see huge patches of bright blue sky this morning. It was an awesome feeling setting out into the cool morning with the dawn on one side and the heavy clouds on the other side. I felt pretty good and with a short day (83km) ahead, I decided to push it out for the morning. At one point, there was a pretty heavy headwind going up a hill and I felt that maybe I had overestimated my reserves for the day. Soon enough though the road turned again and headed downhill so I could wind it back up to >40km/hr.

By lunch I had caught up with Tim and Marcel who I figured were the front of the pack. They had slowed and stopped just inside the Namib Wildlife Park. They'd been lucky enough to see some springbok and orixes. Other riders saw giraffes and bat eared foxes. I saw springbok as well - they jump so high it is pretty hard to miss them. It was pretty cool to see all this stuff. The riding today was actually great all around. Awesome vistas of the desert and ragged hills. I wonder if yesterday had been blue sky instead of raining it might have been the same. Today's views coupled with the awesome, hair raising descent would have been unreal.

Somehow I managed to get to camp first. It felt pretty good to be the first wheel for a change. The only downside is that I can't blindly follow the tracks of the good riders in front of me I have to choose which line to take on the road. This can be a bit of a gamble at times. If you cross the road, bouncing over the centre corrugations and then find that the other side is just as crappy you can be pretty depressed. Having said that, the road was so good for most of the day that at times I could ride with no hands - maximising my air drumming abilities.

Not so lazy now.

2010-04-29T00:33:00.000-07:00

So, its been a while since I had the time, energy and access to good internet to update a blog.

I think last time I wrote it up, I was in Malawi. Since then, I've ridden out of Malawi to Zambia, across Zambia to Victoria Falls, took a detour into Zimbabwe, powered across rainy Botswana and landed here, in Namibia.

Its been a pretty wearing few weeks. Part of me expected to be home and hosed after the hills of Malawi. I figured that the long days in Botswana must mean that the riding was easy. Not so. Our promised tailwinds deserted us. Even turned against us on the last day of riding. The wet season made a return, so we had rainy camps and wet rides.

Despite that, it has been great. Even on the days that turn into slow slugfests, there is something unreal about what our bodes are capable of now. I couldn't do a hand flip to save my life now, but I can sit in a saddle and mash my pedals for hours every day. The moment I realised that even though I felt terrible and wondered what I was doing I had still ridden 80km before morning tea and was about to cross the Zambian / Botswanan border on a tiny ferry was awesome. It was like the time I was zipping down to the bottom of the Blue Nile Gorge, overwhelmed by the immensity of the place and amazed that I was being allowed to race through it.

Here is me in Namibia, halfway through a day fighting a massive headwind.

As you can see, I am now made out of spaghetti and tangerines. My bike is still holding it together pretty well. For the last 3 or so weeks, I've been pumping up my rear tube every morning because I have a slow week. I figured that I had to change my tires in Namibia anyway - no point doing that extra work. Of course, on the last day before tire changes for the dirt, I got a flat in the ride and had to spend some extra time changing it.

My (now maybe dead) GPS in the middle of a longish day.

On the really fast days, my GPS shudders around like nothing else. Even with the zipties, it is like being in a WWII fighter plane, plummeting towards the ground, trying to read the alitimeter. At 70km/hr, I can barely see the numbers. It is how you now that you are going awesome speed. As an added bonus, you can see the relaxed, professional grip that I have on my bars.

In a Wimpys in Maun, Botswana. Maun is a jumping off point for safaris into the Okavango Delta. This girl had found a chameleon on the side of the road. I suspect that it did was going to have a very brief, much loved life.

Still too lazy to blog

2010-04-23T02:12:00.000-07:00

Now in Maun, Botswana.

Here is a turtle I rescued from the middle of the road and put in the bushes.

Not dead, still EFI, but no news today

2010-04-12T01:24:00.000-07:00

I'm here in Lusaka, Zambia. Can't quite work up the energy to write blog posts just yet. Been a really long stretch since Llongwe: 700km+ in 5 days of riding, including a 200km day. Went to dinner and a movie last night, just like real people. I ordered ribs - turned out to be 3 racks of ribs, onion rings and fries. While I was in the bathroom, people bet on how long it would take me to finish eating it all. Turns out that I couldn't finish it at all.

In the meantime, you can enjoy this picture of the bone I used to dig a hole in the middle of Northern Kenya.

Day Three - Soccer Field Camp to Kasunga

2010-04-06T02:50:00.000-07:00

Distance: 107.27km

Ride time: 3:19

Climb: 531m

Another day, another hotel to sleep in. I am definitely starting to appreciate the convenience of having your own bathroom more and more. This morning before getting on the bike I took the shovel for a walk four times. A ridiculous number.

Anyway. Riding.

Today was a truly enjoyable day of riding. The whole day was one big downhill with a sweet tailwind. There were occasional upticks and times when the wind was coming across or slightly to the front but they were almost irrelevant.

The strangest thing was that the downhills weren't always free speed. Normally with a -2% or -3% grade, it is possible to get about 40km/h pretty easily. At -4% I normally tuck in and roll up to 50km/h or more. Today there was something at work that I couldn't pin down. With the tailwind, I should have had been rocking along even quicker. Instead, I was having to pedal all the downhills to keep up a decent speed. Very odd.

Despite that, it was a pretty easy day. Doing it solo with no supporting paceline was not a problem at all.

Lunch was fried egg sandwiches with avocado and tomato. Unfortunately, just looking at them made me think of my morning walks, so I opted for a couple of chunks of pineapple and some electrolyte drink. This quick lunch made people think that I was hankering for a stage win. That couldn't be further from the truth. I was just trying to get to camp quickly so I didn't have to wade through a cornfield trying to find a place to - well you know what. Some of the other riders were less lucky. I think that there could have been more than one emergency stop on the bikes today.

Another rest day tomorrow. It seems that our seven day stretches in the desert or bush with no amenities are a thing of the past. It makes it a pretty different ride. In the desert or bush, we huddle the tarps from the sun or rain. We wait around drinking soup and waiting for dinner. Here in the hotel, we can rock up and have a breakfast beer (it helps having a three hour ride and starting at six am).

Dan's Camping Tip: If you are camping at the hotel, pitch your tent before you start your breakfast beers.

Day Two - Mzuzu to Soccer Field Camp

2010-04-06T02:46:00.000-07:00

Distance: 124.0km
Ride time: 6:00
Climb: 1998m

Best shuffled song: Alive by Pearl Jam

Another mando day. Today was probably the easiest mando day for a while. No dirt, no rocks, just a fair whack of climbing. It was pretty nice climbing as well. Up through the something or other Mountains.

There is a lot of hardwood harvesting going on in the mountains. It could well be one of those short-term good, long-term environment disaster deals, but it is nice to ride with the smell of freshly cut timber. Even better, towards the top of the climb it started to rain and a headwind started to blow. Rain and wind make any climb better.

At one point in the climb, I saw a huge mutant dog loping along the road. I thought that finally all my years of preparation for fighting mutants (read: playing Fallout) would pay off. I was about to jump off my bike and start having at it when I realised it wasn't a mutant at all. It was just a big baboon. For my money, these are actually more dangerous than mutants. They have some pretty big teeth and lot kind of strong.

The big news is that another GI sickness is going around camp. With that on top of my not-quite-cured ESS, I am somehow managing to have two different types of sickness at once. I dunno what to do about it really. I'm cutting a lot of the snack foods out and reducing my portion sizes as well. It would really suck to have gotten to this point and not be able to ride because I can't keep my guts under control.

One of the new Indaba guys, G, has started to ride half days. He has to ride on the lunch truck and do lunch in the morning, so he can't do full days. He rode some loaner bikes a couple of times. Today though, he actually rode sweep (the last rider who has to scrape) - in a pair of borrowed bike shorts. He was lightning fast whipping on his baggies as soon as he got into camp. Pretty funny. Every other rider here is pretty used to getting around in bike gear. Some riders take it too far though: bibs are not all day wear.

Camp today is on an oval near a school. In keeping with the Malawi != Ethiopia, the kids seem to be pretty under control. The local village is also celebrating Easter. Most of it seems to involve smoky fires and drumming.

Dan's Camping Tip: You definitely need to bring a sleeping bag liner. Even if it is too warm to sleep in the liner, you should probably sleep on it. A Thermarest that has been all stunk up with rancid, tropical sweat has a very particular, and in no way pleasant, odour.

Day One - Chitimba Beach to Mzuzu Hotel in Mzuzu

2010-04-06T02:45:00.001-07:00

Distance: 130km (per TDA)

Ride time: Unknown

Climb: 1600m (per TDA)

Best shuffled song: The Legend of John Henry's Hammer.

Each day out of rest day seems to be harder than the last. Not the riding, but battling the malaise brought on by the rest day. Something about not riding, sitting around and eating whenever brings on some powerful apathy. Its strange though, because each time I get back on the bike and really enjoy the day of riding.

Today was especially nice. We cruised down the coast of Lake Malawi for 16 or so kilometres then rode up the escarpment. This was only around 600m or so of climb, but it was enough to afford a great view of the shore, the lake and the rivers that feed into it. Like I've said before; a good view can make up a lot of climbing. At one point on the climb today, we could see along the escarpment and watch a couple of waterfalls spilling out of the forested top of the escarpment. There was also a waterfall right next to the road. I saw a few riders taking advantage of it to try and beat the humidity - it is still plenty muggy at the lower altitudes here.

At the top of the climb, we got our reward. An almost too long and too fast descent down to the valley below. Then a super fast 30km or so with a tailwind. I basically got blown all the way to lunch.

After lunch, we had some taller and steeper hills to contend with. We also swung a bit further southwards and picked up a headwind. This was a bit of a downer - instead of gently sailing along I had to work for the kilometres.

The strangest thing about today was that I had no GPS at all. Like Rambo who had to cut away all his high-tech radios when his cord got tangled during his jump. Instead of a parachute malfunction though, I had a laziness attack and forgot to charge my GPS. Or it got turned on in my bag or something. The upshot was that I had no cycle computer all day. I should have been asking people how far we'd gone when I passed them and checking how long it was taking, but I don't have a watch anymore either.

Riding with no idea how far there was to go or how fast I'm going was kind of nice. Normally, I spend heaps of time thinking about how long it is to go till lunch or camp or whatever landmark is next. Today though, I just rolled along at my own pace looking at the scenery and thinking not much at all. I did go slower than usual though. A couple of times after lunch, I saw Rod and Jullianna in the distance. Normally, I think that I would have caught them. Today, no. I wouldn't want to ride the whole tour without a cycle computer - especially on the harder and longer days - but a day is a nice break.

I am having second thoughts about my Malawi == Ethiopia comments. So far, the kids have been nowhere near as crazy as in Ethiopia. Also, I've started to see more schools which seems to be a good sign. On the downside, I've seen a ridiculous number of coffin shops. Like multiple, competing coffin shops per village. It is the kind of thing that if you heard it on a serious documentary narrated by Dame Judi Dench or someone, you'd think that it is terribly sad. If you see it while riding your bike, you'd probably think it is kind of weird and cool.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you have a hole in your Thermarest you should mark it with tape. If you mark it with chalk and then misapply the hot glue and then pull off the patch in a rage then you will take off the chalk as well. Then you won't be able to find the hole again because the glue will plug it for a while. Then you will be in a pretty pickle indeed.

Day Five - Bush Camp to Chitimba Beach

2010-03-31T10:26:00.000-07:00

Distance: 120.9km

Ride time: 5:58

Climb: 385m

Today was a pretty strange day. Because the rest day tomorrow won't have access to food and markets, TDA wanted us to buy up our stuff today. This meant that the race wouldn't start until 30km in the ride and after we had done our shopping and put it in a 4x4. We got told that the shop didn't open until 8am. Since the store was 30km away, we would need an hour at most to get over there. All the clocks went backwards an hour here in Malawi (I'm ignoring it because I don't like Malawi) so 7am is pretty late. Every other rider had set off by the time we left.

All quiet in camp.

Well, when we got to the store, we found out that it opened at 6:30am, rendering all our delaying kind of useless. The store wasn't too crash hot either, definitely no Nakumat. Not such a big deal though. We've got used to storing a pretty large snack stockpile in case there isn't anything great at a rest day. All we had to get sorted was a bit of food for lunch the next day. We settled on sausages, baked beans and bread. Super, super nutritious. Time will tell if we manage to transform that into an edible meal.

After shopping, the race actually started.

What should have been a pretty easy day - no hills, short distance - turned into a bit of a trek for me. Firstly, there was a headwind the whole day. I think that the relative size difference between me and Stuart and Gisi means that sometimes I don't get much rest in a headwind. I find pulling and not pulling about the same effort. Maybe it is like that for everyone in a headwind. I haven't ridden enough to really know for sure (or even for perhaps).

At about the 90km mark, my back really let go. If I wanted to ride in the paceline, I'd be standing up every couple of minutes. Pretty disruptive. Instead, I waved Stuart and Gisi ahead so that I could make a picnic to camp. As soon as I'd given them the thumbs up and waved them on, I had a new experience on the bike.

My first flat while on the road. I've had plenty of mysterious flats and slow leaks in camp, but before today, no on-the-bike incidents. It was a pretty good flat. A massive thorn straight through. Once I pulled over, about a dozen kids came up to watch what I was doing. One of them, Christopher, spoke okish (he was only 10 years old or something) English. Enough for him to ask me where I was going and understand what I said back. In a lame attempt to keep them amused and not fooling with my bike, I tried keeping up a positive, upbeat commentary on what I was doing and why. It was a pretty textbook operation. Old tube out, check for the cause, find a massive thorn, new tube in, pump it up, quick wonder if it was the right tube I just put in, pump up the tube outside the bike and find out it has a puncture, wheel back on bike. Done.

The funniest part was that as soon as I put on my ipod, some of the kids start bopping up and down. I guess they know what headphones mean out here.

The paceline about to be torn apart by my bad back.

After that, the ride was pretty uneventful until camp. Uneventful, but not fun. One km from camp we turned down a "dirt" road. By dirt, TDA must have meant crappy sand that is impossible to ride through. On top of a tiring day, this was pretty annoying. It made me fail my personal goal of not getting annoyed for a whole day.

Anyways, in the overlander camp at Chitimba beach. They have a beach volleyball court. I'd forgotten how much fun this game is. Since I last played, I've developed the ability to dig the ball without freaking out. Makes returning serves much easier.

Dan's Camping Tip: Europeans love getting naked. If you are surrounded by old, wizened Europeans getting washed and changed, maybe keep your eyes on your soup bowl.

Day Four - Stockholm Hotel in Mbeya to Bush Camp

2010-03-31T09:02:00.000-07:00

Distance: 120.15km

Ride time: 7:04

Climb: 972m

Non-race day. Hooray.

These are the days that we get to have cokes, take photos and generally mess around.

The ride itself was pretty nice. A pretty decent climb straight out of camp. This quickly took us out of Mbeya and all its craziness and above the layer of cloud. Above the cloud there was a fantastic view of the hills all around. In our head-down paceline we didn't actually notice until we saw a bunch of other riders standing on the side of the road. "Flat party?" Stuart wondered. Turns out no, not a flat party, but a photo party. Once we saw the view, we had to stop and join the photo party as well.

The photo party in full swing.

Part of the panorama at the photo party.

The climb to the top was pretty sustained but enjoyable. The whole time, you had a great view back into the valley that we rode up from yesterday afternoon. The whole valley was blanketed in a thick layer of cloud. Although the climb had been billed as a bit of a monster, it was over way too soon. I felt like I could have climbed it all over again.

So, too soon we were on the descent. After the climb, we dropped all the way down to the Tanzania / Malawi border. This was pretty sweet. Plenty of smallish (and not so smallish) hills. Most of them were exactly the right size for smashing up in the big ring. There were one or two that required some shifting, but for most of the ride, I could have been riding a single speed.

We had more cokes than was probably healthy. Stuart and I had six cokes before we got to camp. Three of them in one place. It is surely a nice change to the usual though.

One of the coke stops. Stuart, Gisi, Erin and Dana.

I don't think I have had more than a handful of days with cokes stops that weren't non-race days. One of them was the day after Dindir in Sudan when I was wasted and had around 1 million cokes. Another was the Blue Nile Gorge climb were I had a great couple of cokes about halfway up. Lastly was a stop on a really heavy traffic day out of Khartoum when we were all mentally shot from fighting against trucks and buses.

On non-race days, it seems like we have to make up for all this. Not only did we stop for cokes, I also bought a Camelbak full of passionfruit in a market.

The border crossing was probably the most annoying yet. The actual paperwork, getting stuff stamped part was pretty painless. The hassle came when we needed to get some Malawi money. Gisi and Stuart tried with some dodgy looking guys in the no-mans land between countries. These guys were pretty annoying. Crowding around, touching my bike, yelling, moving us around. I was pretty unimpressed and said that we should just go. Gisi changed anyways. It wasn't until we were over the border and in Malawi that she worked out that instead of 4000 Malawi monies, she had been given 400. She went charging back across the border to see if she could find the criminal that gyped her, but to no avail. It kind of short circuited a lot of hassle where they denied it happened, etc.

After the crossing, we powered up the slight incline to the camp. Basically, it was back to Ethiopian camps. The most frustrating thing about it is that a lot of the adults around the camp (read: the ones that have nothing better to do from noon to sunset on a Monday) think that it is hilarious when kids:

watch women pee.
watch women get changed in their tents.
steal stuff.
walking around peering in tents.
yelling out for us to give us stuff

It is pretty crazy the difference between Tanzania and Malawi. In Tanzania there were schools everywhere, including in the remote, dirt road areas in the middle of the country (like where the guy had to ride for six hours to get where he was going), and there were hardly any kids hanging around camps. In Malawi, I've seen hardly any schools and there are hundreds of kids, on the sides of the roads and in camps.

So, I guess that if you are going to donate money, then donate money to some scheme that is going to build and staff schools. It may not make any real difference, but it will make life for cyclists a lot easier.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you have two doors on your tent, in countries that are officially pro-stealing stuff then you can use a keyring to lock your tent doors. Hopefully, key rings are some kind of magic that they can't understand.

Day Three - Bush Camp to Stockholm Hotel in Mbeya

2010-03-29T05:18:00.001-07:00

Distance: 94.53km
Ride time: 3:52
Climb: 1079m

Today was probably the nicest ride I've had for a while. The paved parts of Tanzania are probably a close second to Ethiopia for enjoyable riding. Nice hills to ride up and down, good views, good pavement. Unlike Ethiopia, I don't have to worry about a little kid karate kicking me off my bike on the fast downhills.

The morning was pretty cruisy. Stuart, Gisi and I were all feeling a bit tired from the previous couple of days, so it was a pretty slow pace. We were still catching and passing the usual suspects. After a while though, we started to feel that none of us felt like smashing ourselves today. Stuart and Gisi planned on doing a sensible, spinning pace and skipping lunch. I decided to backtrack for a bit and ride with Steph. Her bad toe is pretty annoying on the bike and riding alone with an injury can really suck.

When I rejoined with Steph, she was going a fair bit faster than she normally does. I was feeling like I had plenty left in the tank, so we bumped it out to lunch. It sounds terrible, but it is way less effort to ride with someone that is even a tiny bit slower. Hopefully, Steph felt like she got a good deal being pulled to lunch.

After lunch (scrambled eggs with bacon!) we had the hard part of the day: a 25km climb up to the hotel where we would be staying. The average gradient for the climb was 2.5%, which is enough to be challenging. Especially in the humidity - dropping down yesterday and this morning meant that it was pretty muggy again.

Looking back down the climb to the valley below.

It sure was nice to get to the top of the climb and still have enough left in my legs to do a decent clip through the town. Doubly so since there was a fresh, cool tailwind.

All in all, an enjoyable day on the bike.

Camping tip of the day: If you are camped in long grass and expect a dew, trample down the grass under your vestibule. Otherwise, you will be pretty damp in the morning.

Day Two - Forest Camp to Bush Camp

2010-03-29T05:17:00.000-07:00

Distance: 126.26km
Ride Time: 4:00
Climb: 824m

Today was a great ride. We descended over 1400m and had a morning tailwind, so we could knock out a fairly good pace.

Stuart and I got a bit carried away for the first 20km or so. On the small rollers, we were cranking it out pretty hard. For me, part of that is because at the start of the ride, you can see the riders that left earlier. The urge to chase, faster than you have to, is irresistible for me. On the change over from me to Stuart, Gizzy looked pretty uncomfortable with our reckless, unsustainable pace. Being fat and being able to bomb it down the hills has its advantages I guess, because I am definitely not faster than Gizzy going up the hills.

As expected, I couldn't hold the pace all day. When we hit the climb from 1100m to 1250m (not that big) at the end of the day, I was really suffering. I'm not too fussed though, because once again, I felt better than I did the day before. Maybe by the end of the trip, I will be as fit as I was at the start. That would be pretty sweet.

Ted, one of the riders that loves going on side trips, might have organised proper fitness testing in Cape Town when the trip ends. It will be pretty interesting to see if we are healthy or not at the end of the tour. I kind of feel that our adaptation to cycling means that we are going to be less generally fit. I can't accelerate on the bike like I used to. I certainly don't have the upper body strength that I used to.

A good day to be on the bike. Nice hills, kind wind and good scenery. Reuben was feeling like today was his day for a stage win, so he was out for the kill - just shouting out his number as he blew straight through lunch.

One of the other rides, Steve, wanted to ride his bike to lunch, but his bike was already on the truck. The bike spends a lot of time up there, so I guess that the Indaba guys assumed that it should go up. Instead, he rode the truck to lunch, then hitchhiked in a Coke truck to camp. Pretty funny.

Smells like dinner will have bacon in it. Definitely a good day.

Day One - Iringa to Forest Camp

2010-03-29T05:15:00.000-07:00

Distance: 105.68km
Ride time: 5:17
Climb: 1300m

Best shuffled song: No music - iPods prohibited.

Today did not start well. I'd arranged through reception for a taxi at 6.30. I figured that would give me plenty of time to put tubes in my wheels before having breakfast. Well, of course the taxi wasn't there. When reception tried to call for one, the taxi guy didn't want to come or something. So, first the night watchman went looking for a taxi. Then the reception lady followed him (there might have been some angernon moments in between).

While I was waiting, I tried to check out. Despite having VISA signs and me having been told that my VISA would work, it didn't. I had no where near enough Tanzanian Shillings to pay.
So, when my taxi turned up at 5 to, the reception lady jumped in as well. I got a stack of cash out of the Barclays ATM and handed it over. My on and off relationship with that hotel did not end well.

No breakfast, dodgy job putting the tubes in quick photo of the board and we were off. I miss the Arusha Hotel.

Despite how it started, today was actually really, really good. For most of the day, the weather was great. Plenty of hills, but no terrible grades. Not nearly as much traffic as we had been told.
There were some dodgy moments. The normal thing of cars and buses overtaking slow trucks and taking the whole lane. I only got forced right off the road one time. One of the descents was a 70km screamer. At the bottom a bunch of potholes. Some people didn't look ahead far enough to see them and had to do some emergency manoeuvres. This would have been pretty risky if a truck had been coming the other direction.

Lunch is going from strength to strength. Today my sandwich concoction was half an avocado, two slices of cheese, baloney, a sliced pickle, Branson Pickle, cucumber and tomato. So much better than pita bread, tuna salad and oranges. I guess that being in a richer country is definitely a good thing.

Talking about wealthy countries, the rumour is that Malawi is like Ethiopia. We'll have a camp perimeter again and have to keep everything locked down. I am definitely not looking forwards to it. It is hard to relax after the ride when you are being watched by four hundred and sixty eight little kids.

Anyway.

No that I've got my appetite back and am sleeping through the night, I definitely feel much more enthusiastic on the bike. Still slow with no staying power and no acceleration, but I actually feel comfortable on the bike again. Hopefully I'll build back up to being _and_ feeling strong.

Day Zero - Rest day in Iringa

2010-03-29T05:00:00.000-07:00

Since I am feeling so much better, I have been eating an inhuman amount of food.
The night before the rest day, most of the riders and staff headed to a bar called Shooters. Unfortunately, a bunch of Peace Corps people had also headed to a bar called Shooters. I didn't even know that the Peace Corps still existed. I thought it was one of those bad ideas from the Eighties like plaid shirts and leg warmers.

I had the strangest hotel room. Well, suite. Well, kind of suite. It was in a lodge (read motel) out of the centre of town. They had made a suite by knocking a big room and a small room together. Then they had piled in all the furniture that they possibly could.

So, in the little sitting room, there were:
* three chairs,
* a table,
* a TV,
* the thing that was the TV was on,
* a bar fridge,
* and a cabinet for the fridge to sit on.
This was all in a room about 2m by 2m. Pretty crowded.

In the bedroom there was:
* a pretty big bed,
* a wardrobe,
* a broken floor lamp,
* a dressing lamp,
* two bedside tables,

Ok. I got bored writing this list. This really would have been one of those cases were a picture is worth a thousand words. I should have thought of that before I checked out and left the hotel.

So Far Update

2010-03-26T05:07:00.001-07:00

So, a clearer map of where we have been. Even though my GPS went flat before we got to Iringa, you can see that we are close to the border with Malawi.

Total distance riden is now 6058. Pretty close to last time - not much to show for seven days of hammering ourselves on dirt roads.

Day Seven - Hilltop Camp to Iringa

2010-03-26T00:07:00.000-07:00

Distance: 74km according to the TDA guys.
Ride time: Unknown, GPS died.

Probably the best that I have felt since before Nairobi. I slept really well over night. No caffeine, no night stomach cramps, a reasonably hard day and cooling rain at night meant that I sacked out and slept pretty solidly. I did wake up at 4am to the sound of pretty hard rain. This got me thinking about my tent, and the velcro straps that hold my fly (the outside, waterproof part of the tent) to the poles. I had thought that these were to make sure that the fly is positioned so that water won't pool then seep through. But. I figured that they would also hold the poles in position, and the tent up, if I unclipped the inner. That would mean that I could do a rain pull down without getting my non-waterproof inner wet at all.

When the 6am wake up time came around, I put my theory to the test. Sure enough, I could do an inner-first takedown. The only limitation (that I can see) is that you have to do it crouched in the tiny vestibule. And by tiny, I mean extremely tiny. Like, smaller than me tiny. Still, it is way better than a wet inner.

The actual riding today was also pretty good. We started with a 20km, all climb, dirt time trial. This was pretty awesome. All the rain overnight, and the sprinkling during the morning, had softened the dirt into a tacky mud. This made for some slow going and some hard breathing. I definitely pushed too hard, enjoying feeling good, and ran out of juice before the halfway mark. It was still a fun climb. The classic climb along a valley, winding in and out with the contours. Heavily forested hills with low hanging cloud and a winding road makes for a nice climb. Looking across and seeing the road that you've come up is always inspiring.

I was really surprised (in a good way) at the speed that some of the people went by me. Jason and Reuben both flew by. Those guys have been loving the dirt. Jason is a great high cadence rider, I think that served him well on the rocky, muddy climb. Reuben is a strange guy. Sometimes I can fly by him in the morning and not see him all day. Other times, like today, he can really be up there, pushing it out and outdoing me with ease. Those guys both did great in the time trial - and totally well deserved.

Because the end of the time trial marked the end of the stage and the section people were free to hang around. So we did. Ate a PVM bar. Drunk some water, scrapped some of the mud off my bike. Stuart had a boiled egg he had the forethought to bring from breakfast. We were all pretty happy to be at the end of another section and to have no more racing for a day and a half. Plus, delicious endorphins from pushing up a muddy hill in the rain. When the dinner truck went by, we all looked at the people riding the truck staring at us out the window. i was definitely happy to be on the outside (in the rain, covered in mud, with another fifty klicks to ride) looking in.

I really hope that I don't have a fall or mechanical that forces me on to the truck. So much of it comes down to luck. Some of the strongest riders have lost EFI because they got sick at the wrong time or crashed. What is more telling than EFI is how people act after losing it. Some people get back on their bike as soon as possible. Others fall into a habit of riding the truck.

Keeping EFI is such a strong motivator for me that it helps me stay on the bike on tough days. Without that motivator, I know that I would be tempted to get back on the truck again and again. I hope that I would be strong like some of the other guys and ride as much as possible, writing off the loss of EFI as bad, unavoidable luck.

It makes me wonder how much EFI means - how many riders would have been able to ride the whole tour if it hadn't been for that one day of bad luck. I know that Dindir National Park was a turning point for a lot of people. The day was so unexpectedly and uncharacteristically hard that losing EFI must have felt like being robbed. Every day up to that point had been so manageable with consistent riding. Then Dindir came along and was 140km of bad road, hot conditions and infuriating convoys. For the people that finished, it was elating. I was tired, physically shattered and worn out, but I'd finished the day and still had EFI. There were hugs, hand shaking and back slapping. People that had fallen, been swept kilometres from the finish or couldn't face the conditions with scant chance of success had nothing to boost their spirits. I can completely understand why some got straight on the truck the next day. But it makes me respect so very much the people that didn't finish the day, that didn't have that post-ride elation, but still got on their bikes the next day, and the day after that.

I think that a large part of how I view people that crack and get back on the truck is brought about by a fear that maybe, deep down, I'll turn out to be one of those people. Knowing that you've held something in such disdain makes it hard to do. It can cut both ways though.

Gisi finishing the climb in the second half of the day.

Stuart looking happy to have finished the climb.

The view from the top of the climb.
Dan's Camping Tip: Inside out tent taking down is awesome. And you can probably do it.

Day Six - Bush Camp to Hilltop Camp

2010-03-25T23:58:00.001-07:00

Distance: 99.27km
Ride time: 6:02
Climb: 770m

Today was a pretty good day. Lunch was at the halfway point (distance wise) of the tour. Marked with a line of PVM drink power. Apt.

Lunch was pretty special. Instead of the normal fare, we had a feast. Cheese (two types!) and crackers. Branson pickles. Pineapple chunks. Cashews and raisins. Passion fruit. Avocado. Marmite. Tomato. Cucumber. Great, great stuff. I am kicking myself that I didn't take a photo, but I was too busy enjoying it.

After lunch and the halfway point, we basically climbed all the way to camp. WIth a real kicker towards the end. I made this a bit more challenging by snapping the shifter cable for my rear derailleur. I rode for a while in the tallest gear at the back, but eventually I cracked and jury rigged it back up so that I was about a third of the way up the cluster. Riding in my granny at the front on the climbs and rough sections meant I was crossing the chain a fair bit and producing a horrible noise, but I didn't want to fool with the system either. When I got to the steep climb at the end, I had to risk it and shift into an easier gear.

About two thirds of the way up the climb, I happened to look out to my right and saw the view. Before then, I hadn't realised how high we'd climbed from the dam. It was neat to see how far away the dam was, and how far below. Definitely a satisfying way to end the day. Oh yeah, we rode over a dam today. African countries are pretty picky about their dams, important bridges and military installations, so we were told not to take photos. No doubt someone has got some good ones though.

The view down into the dam.

The view back towards the dam a long time later.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you take a nap on your Thermarest under the truck and leave your bags uncovered, drape and arm out from under. That way when it starts raining, you'll know to get up and move your bags somewhere that they won't get wet. Also, when you get out of the truck, remember that the door is probably open, so don't stand up and smash your back into it.

Day Five - Dodoma to Bush Camp

2010-03-25T23:52:00.000-07:00

Distance: 95.3km

Ride time: 4:28

Climb: 191m

Definitely a cyclocross dirt day today. Just a bit of sand and some small corrugations. Apart from that, it was pretty smooth sailing. Not even any real hills to slow us down. I kind of feel like the other shoe has to drop soon. This is meant to be a rough, challenging section and apart from the day after the mando day, it hasn't been too bad. Pretty bad, but not too bad.

Even though the road was better, there were still plenty of opportunities to cut across on the little bike paths. After lunch, I got onto a pretty long diversion. It was nice and fast but I started to get a bit worried when I couldn't see the road anymore. I didn't turn around. I figured that I'd enjoy riding up the path as much as I was riding down it. I kind of knew where the road was so I headed in that direction until I got to a village with a road that headed towards the main road.

Other riders had a harder time finding the road again. There was a massive time difference between the first ten or so riders and the next riders. Some also had a lot of punctures. I guess that it is all part of the tour. There would have been worse places to get lost. Taking a wrong turn in Ethiopia could have taken you down a huge hill that you would have had to ride all the way back up.

It is hard to describe how pleasant the singletrack is though. It is so smooth and effortless compared to the road. Stop pedalling on the road and the best case is you slow right down. Worst case is you lose momentum, hit some soft sand and fall or careen across the road. Stop pedalling on the singletrack and you coast along. Maybe you get lucky and there are some little bumps that you can pump to keep speed. Plus, riding a touring bike with tank tyres on singletrack is a very singular experience (hah, see my witty pun?). It feels kind of like being on a Tron lightcycle. Hunched down over the drops and twisting around obstacles. It is so absorbing, that I stop thinking about how much further I have to go, where I am or what I am doing. A nice change.

The view before dropping down the last hill to the camping plain.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you think it is going to rain (and it probably will in wet season Tanzania) don't pitch your tent in the grassy depression. Smart money is that rain will probably run down there.

Day Four - Field Camp to Dodoma

2010-03-25T23:51:00.002-07:00

Distance: 109km

Ride time: 5:02

Climb: 520m

Best shuffled song: The Last Song by the Foo Fighters

Fourth day of dirt. As Marcel put it, today was more a cyclocross dirt day than a mountain bike dirt day. For me this great. Most of the day was pretty relaxing. Good hard packed dirt on the main road. A couple of fun sidetracks to be found.

A still feel like I am not quite over being sick. I am definitely not feeling any of the symptoms that I had before, so I can eat food and sleep now. But I haven't got back much bike fitness. Every day, I feel a bit better, and can push for a bit longer in the morning. Taking it a bit easy in the morning would seem like the sensible thing to do, but I kind of worry that I would just get used to riding slower all the time. I'd rather suffer a bit in the middle part of the ride (the last part is always awesome) and work on getting a bit fast again. That's my plan anyway. The other guy that got ESS is taking the opposite approach - ramping up slowing - so we can compare recoveries. He has a lot further to climb back up than me though. He is dangerously skinny from the sickness and then his summit attempt on Kilimanjaro.

No mangoes for lunch today. The new Indaba guy, G, took the trouble to shout out "No mangoes at lunch today mate" as he went by in the lunch truck. I guess that eating 6 mangoes in one go makes quite an impression.

Training for RAAM Eric and I went looking for some fresh fruit in Dodoma. We tried a couple of places, but the mangoes weren't anything on the mangoes from yesterday. Eric ended up getting some little mangoes and avocados. He is counting of getting a lot of calories from avocados. Seems smart. As well as fresh fruit, we got some Tanzanian style fast food. I ordered a hotdog by pointing at the sausages then saying "bun". The guy was nodding his head and saying "yes, bun" so I thought that we were both on the same page. Turns out not. I just got a couple of sausages on a place. They were actually pretty good though. I followed up by ordering some chips. This turned out to be a mistake. The guy had run out of charcoal for his grill, so he had to send out for some. By the time that arrived, and he'd fried (not deep fried) the chips, I kind of felt like all my prime relaxing time had been spent.

Dan's Camping Tip: When you are checking into your hotel, make sure that you get a room with air-conditioning. Fans can't battle equatorial humidity.

Day Three - Secondary School to Field Camp

2010-03-25T23:51:00.001-07:00

Distance: 98.7km

Ride time: 8:25 (includes a lunchtime nap)

Climb: 1026

Best shuffled song: Master of Puppets by Metallica

Today was another dirt day. My game plan for the day was to make a picnic. And I executed perfectly. I was taking it pretty easy and on track for a six hour day. Then at lunch, I heard that the bike rack on the dinner truck (the truck with my tent and everything else) had broken the bike rack and would be late into camp. I figured that I might as well sit around the lunch stop and eat mangoes for a while. Better than sitting around camp with nothing to wear and nothing to do. After I ate a bunch of mangoes and looked for some buried treasure, I felt a bit tired and figured that I might as well have a nap as well.

Sleeping sprawled across three camping stools is easier than it sounds.

An hour or so later, I felt like I should actually get going.

The other highlight of the day was finding singletrack to ride on. Parallel (sorta) to the main road is a footpath / bikepath. Not only is it easier going than the often corrugated and sandy road, but it is way more fun. Twisty, narrow track with bushes and flowering plants growing right up to the edge is pretty fun to ride along. One descent was particularly cool. Narrow track across open slick rock and gravel. Super fast. Way better than thumping down the road, smashing into rocks and grinding through sand. It was so good that I ended up spending a bit of time back tracking looking for entrances to more tracks.

Some of the riders have very little experience riding off road. As in, limited to the amount of off road that we've done on the TDA. I'm no great shakes on the dirt, but for these guys it must be even harder. They have to ride for a much longer time (no naps and mangoes for them) and have less confidence on the descents. At the end of a long day, it is easy to misjudge something, even something as innocuous as some sand, and end up falling over. I managed to do just that. For me it is more funny than scary. If I'd done it at high speed and put a rock into my ribs it would have been a lot less funny though. Anyway. My whole point here is that some of the riders ended up having to play it safe and walk down some of the descents. That must have sucked. They made it to camp though in one piece though, so yeah.

When I got to camp the people that I normally (used to?) ride with told me that they were getting worried when I hadn't turned up and were thinking about sending back a bike with spare parts. It is good that some people are watching my back. I'd better not make a habit of lunch naps, or they might get too used to me being late. Then I'd really be missing those spare parts. Camp rumour is so rife at the moment that one guy had heard that I was deathly ill and that is why I had to take a nap.

One of the expedition riders, Jeff, somehow got hooked up with a local and took the "cut-off". According to him, it was an hour long descent of single track. Instead of going up and over the hill that we rode up, he traversed across the ridge line, going through villages, dry river beds and canyons. Sounded pretty awesome - and the local dropped him right at one of the TDA trucks, so he was dead on target. Jeff said that the local was in a real hurry. He was going to be riding until 6 o'clock that night to get where he was going. It amazes me that someone that keen to get wherever it is that they were going had no faster way of getting there. Not in a bad way, just a puzzled way. Maybe the spirit of commuters is worldwide.

Oh. Ali (our Kenyan and Tanzanian fixer) and Sharita were filming and taking photos at the descent down the big hill of the day. The climb itself had been pretty fun. Plenty of almost technical riding that required picking a nice line and working up little rock ledges. But a lot of spinning as well. It was only a 200m 4km climb but that, plus having to absorb the bumps from the rocks on the way down, meant that I was pretty tired. I did not cut a very dashing figure - so don't be holding out for an "EXTREMEZ HARDCORE CORNERING" video on the TDA website any time soon.

Only four more days of dirt until we get to Iringa and then it is pavement (no doubt of varying quality) until Namibia. I'm not sure where Namibia is exactly, but I hope it is a long way away. We get to Dodoma, the administrative capital of Tanzania, tomorrow. I hope that I'll be able to get a hotel room for the night.

Pineapple update: No pineapples to be found within walking distance of camp last night. Six mangoes at lunch today more than made up for it.

Dan's Camping Tip: Bring a tent peg mallet. You will be camping on hard ground. Nothing is more futile looking than a tired man trying to hammer a peg into a rock hard ground. Except the peg springing right back out thirty seconds later.

Day Two - Lakeview Camp to Secondary School

2010-03-25T23:46:00.001-07:00

Distance: 119.7km

Ride time: 6:37

Climb: 1201m

Best shuffled song: Brain too rattled to remember.

Mando day. The idea of these days is that they are so hard or representative of the riding in the country that your time for them must be counted towards your race time. You can't drop the time as one of your three grace days. The winner of the stage also get a 30 minute time bonus.

These have been a pretty mixed bag so far. Some, like the Blue Nile Gorge and the constant climb day in Ethiopia, have been awesome. Challenging riding and plenty of things to look at. Others, like the lava rock day in Marsabit, have been really, really hard and taken a lot out of me.

Today's mango day was one of the easiest but also pretty uninspiring. All but ~5km was unpaved. A mixture between road construction, corrugated, rutted roads and pretty nice dirt road. Plenty of variation in road surface, but with a definite preponderance of third world dirt. I guess that all the construction work means that this section will be paved by next year, just like our last 20km yesterday had been paved as well.

The best part of the ride today was definitely the dirt climbs after lunch. Some of the pinches were 15%. Nice way to spend lunchtime. Also good was negotiating the small tracks on the side of the rutted roads. Made for a terrible average speed, but way more fun than smashing over another set of corrugations.

I've put up my tent, baby wiped, peeled a bunch of garlic and eaten soup. Now all I have to do is walk to the nearest village and see if they will sell me a pineapple. Pineapple is the king of fruits.

Some of the views during the day - definitely in big sky country out here.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you leave your lantern on in your tent, try not to also leave your inner unzipped. Especially when you are in the Tropics. Spiders, strange bugs and massive flies are not what you want to be dealing with last thing at night.

Day One - Arusha to Lakeview Camp

2010-03-25T23:38:00.000-07:00

Distance: 105.56km
Ride time: 3:48
Climb: 545

Best shuffled song: You Were the Last High by The Dandy Wharhols (honourable mention to Shake That by Eminem)

Today really started yesterday for me. I had to arrange my taxi to get from the hotel to the campground early in the morning. The front desk pointed me towards the doorman who hooked me up with a taxi driver. He wanted 10k to go down to the camp. This is about twice as much as it should be. He reckoned it was because it would be early in the morning so he had to charge extra. I told him: "That's cool, you can sleep in tomorrow and not make any money." My lightning wit won me the haggling battle.

When I turned up at camp, there was a bit of a problem. I no longer had a bike helmet. I wasn't sure whether I'd left it at the hotel or if it had gone walkabout at the campsite. I looked around pretty good but couldn't see it anywhere. Luckily, our route for the day was going to take us back past the hotel, so I would be able to check my room on the way back out. I got a humorously small loaner helmet from the truck and headed off for the day. I powered up to the hotel but my room was empty. I was definitely starting to get a bit annoyed. Having to get a replacement helmet sent across was going to take a lot of time and effort. Not a good way to start the day.

The first few kilometres out of town were pretty hectic. A lot of dodging around traffic and pedestrians. Made a bit harder by the ubiquity of potholes (ubiquity is a $50 word). Being a safety conscious person, I managed to get a shot of Joss and Gerald on my way by. You can't really see Gerald because Joss is completely eclipsing him. In a convoy, this would have been a bit stressful. Riding solo, it just makes it entertaining. I guess until you smash into the side of a cement truck pulling out in front of you.

After town, we had an awesome set of rolling hills out to about the 40km mark. These hills were perfectly made for being smashed up. I didn't drop much below 35 for most of it. So much fun I forgot all about the helmet. On one of the slight downhills, I went by a local rider at 42km/h. I was on the drops, so I could still see their shadow right behind me. Since I was enjoying riding solo, I came up a little out of the saddle and put everything I could into it so that I could drop them out of my draft. It worked. For about five seconds their shadow dropped back. Then they caught me back up. I finally stole a quick glance over my shoulder and found out it wasn't the local rider after all. It was Gerry, one of the sectional riders, using me a domestique to catch back up with Viv, his partner. Much less demoralising than being drafted by a guy in long pants riding a clapped out clunker.

I was feeling so good, when I caught up with Stuart and Gisi I went right on by and kept going. After 40km, the hills became a little more sustained (not much more, as you can see from the total climb for the day) and I had to start changing gears. Still I felt pretty good getting into lunch. I was a bit worried about the rest of the ride. Our brief had been for 20km of dirt at the end of the day. Not something to look forwards to eagerly on a fully rigid bike. I got to 80km and started working out average speeds and when I could get to camp. Then 85km came up and no dirt. 90, 95 and 100 all rolled around with no dirt. It seems that the construction in this section had all been finished. In the end we only had 800m or so of dirt from the road down to the campsite.

All day, the views were awesome. We are going through really green farmlands set against some distant hills. I know I saw this about almost everything, but it reminds me of riding down Yass Road towards the Brindabellas. More crops and less cattle though. And there is no river at the bottom that you can swim in. Also, houses are made out of wood and thatch here. Apart from that though, its a dead ringer.

Gerry, Jethro and Viv powering up the hill while I am taking photos.

The views were worth it though.
While I was waiting for a bucket shower, Paul came up to me with a surprise. Someone had put my helmet in some box in the truck. I have no idea why it was there. It was sweet to get it back.

Gerald has bought a new shirt from a gas station. The front reads "Well spotted I am a Mzungu". The back has "And no, I don't have any: money; pens; chocolate". I think that you'd have to have walked or cycled across Kenya and Tanzania to really appreciate this shirt.

Dan's Camping Tip (guest written by Gisi): If you see a tree that has many birds in it - don't put your tent up underneath it.

Repacking

2010-03-18T11:14:00.000-07:00

Number of milkshakes: 2
Largest number of Tanzanian Shillings in wallet: 900,000
Time spent by pool without sunscreen: Enough for an embarrassing sunburn on my stomach

Best packing song: This Love by Pantera (yep, some part of my brain is still 14 years old)

Since I have three days off, I figured it was time to check my gear and repack.

So far all I have really accomplished is to initiate the largest gear-splosion ever (Karen: you can't use this word in Scrabble). Well. I did patch a bunch of tubes that I'd hidden away so that I didn't have to look at them.

As you can see, I have a lot of gear. Some of it has definitely not been worth carrying with me. The cans of tuna from Bahir Dar in Ethiopia could probably go. The empty doxycycline bottles that are too nice (what is wrong with me?) to throw away could probably go. Before the tour I got a notebook and nice Ortleib case so that I could take down the directions and language notes. I don't even carry it with me on the bike anymore.

The fancy Keen sandals are a bit of a white elephant. They are too good to wear in the shower, but not really suitable for walking around the bush or desert. I'd bring some cheap thongs (flip-flops if you are not Australian) instead.

Four pairs of gloves is probably overkill. I brought so many because I wanted different gloves with different seam patterns in case I started to suffer. I've worn all those gloves so much back home that I could have played it safe and just brought one long fingered set and one short fingered set. On the upside, I can make like Michael Jackson and wear different coloured gloves. Whatever else happens, I have the glove situation sorted out.

So far, I haven't needed a bike spare that I don't have. Knock on wood. There are some things that kind of worry me a little though. If I bust an SPD pedal, I'd be screwed. If I snap my bars or stem, I'd be screwed (but probably so hurt in the resultant stack I wouldn't care). You can only bring so much stuff though.

What I do wish I brought is the right footprint for my tent. That way I could pack away the inner and keep it dry when it was raining. I also wish I brought along a real tarp instead of a tarp/poncho contraption.

I'd also have packed some more cleaning stuff. Or bought it in Cairo. A stiff shoe brush is definitely good for cleaning some things. On the other hand, an old t-shirt is almost as good if you are prepared to take off the chain and rear wheel. Maybe some degreaser to chuck in a spare bidon and get the chain really clean. Maybe. Snap on chain cleaners are pretty useless if you have a quick link on your chain. Oh yeah - put quick links on your chain. A real, non-wax, lube would be nice as well.

Multi-vitamins are something that I'd bring from home. You can get them in most places over here, but it is extra hassle that you might not want. 120 days worth isn't going to take up much space in your baggage. If you are into fish oil tablets you might have to ween yourself off them. I can't see how you'd make them work in the deserts. Some guys brought powder to mix up recovery drinks. I think this is a close call. Making concoctions out of infant formula and whatever else you can find has its own merits. Depends on if you want to be the inventor of the successor to Mr Dan's Awesome Drink. Some riders have caffeinated gels and so on. I don't think that I could have packed enough of them to be worthwhile. If you are keen on racing and need to win the mando stages for the time bonuses, these might be worthwhile if you can ration them out.

I think that number of gadgets that you bring is pretty personal. I couldn't get by without a laptop to charge my other stuff, organise my photos and hold all my music. Others get by perfectly well without one. My GPS cycle computer has made changing tyre sizes less hassle and lets me know how much of the day's climbing I have done. Some riders have no cycle computer at all. I'd say that most people would bring a good camera. Portable music things are good for me - I like to listen to something last thing at night and certainly while riding. More audiobooks might have been nice to bring.

I would most definitely not bring the Solio solar charger. It takes ages to charge (even in the Sudanese desert) and won't charge my iPhone or iPod. The free usb charger that takes 4 AA batteries is a way better thing to have. If my laptop battery runs out, it has been an excellent failsafe for my phone, gps and iPod. Definitely, absolutely recommended if your stuff can charge from USB. Which reminds me: the more stuff you can charge from USB the better. The only downside is if someone walks off with your USB wall charger and keeps it for themselves.

I've been pretty happy with the quality of all the gear that I brought along. My little Macpac tent has a tiny whole in it, but it has done some pretty hard work. Rocks, sand, trash, wind and rain haven't caned it too badly. It is also big enough for me and all my bags (no bags under the fly in Ethiopia). The off brand thermarest has done solid work.

In terms of riding clothes, I wish I could say buy your stuff early and ride it for a while first to make sure it is comfortable. Instead, I should say: buy some Santini bibs recommended by your shop, try them on once, pack them, then ride them all the time. Even in the depths of ESS bibs weren't a problem. You can get your jersey off and bibs down in a hurry with sufficient motivation. Maybe you will even look cool, striding purposely towards a distant bush, pulling your jersey off over your head and shrugging off your straps. You might have to practise your purposeful stride though. And if your toilet paper is in your jersey pocket, don't leave your jersey half way between bike and bush. Pro tip.

Second Rest Day in Arusha

2010-03-18T00:05:00.002-07:00

After a totally lazy first day, I actually had to do something on the second day. No just sitting around, reading magazines and eating bacon. Instead of that, Gizzy, Reiner and I headed out for a day safari to Arusha National Park. This was a lot better than I thought it would be. The whole park is set against Mount Meru, so the scenery seems especially spectacular.

We got to see bunch of animals. Girraffees (go spelling), zebras, warthogs and baboons were pretty much everywhere. It was pretty awesome to see those animals. I guess that I kind of know how people feel when they come to Australia and see kangaroos or sulphur crested cockatoos.

We also saw a bunch of colobus monkeys and blue something or other monkeys. It is odd to see things that look like little people hanging around picking food and fighting. While we were watching one groups group of Colobus monkeys, they suddenly all scampered up the trees to get higher. Then the alpha male started making the eeriest croaking sound. Hearing it, you wouldn't believe how little those guys are. It sounded almost exactly like the noise a Predator makes when it is hunting action heroes. A minute or so later, we heard the same croaking noise from the other side of the road. Our guide's guess was that the two groups had come too close together, and the males were croaking as part of a territorial display. It was a reminder of how strange and different Africa is.

We also saw an albino baboon baby. Pretty neat.

The only disappointment was that the flamingoes had already migrated. Apparently, they migrate when the lakes become too diluted by fresh water. The algae that they feed off doesn't grow so well in the fresher water and they have nothing to eat. It was still neat to go and look at the alkaline lakes where they normally are though.

We also missed out on the hippos. We drove around a bit looking for them, but couldn't find them anywhere. We did spend a bit of time driving around off the roads asking farmers where hippos are. If I were a farmer in Tanzania, I'd want to know where massively dangerous behemoths are. Getting your legs crushed by an angry hippo is one thing, but having it happen by surprise when you are collecting eggs in the morning would be even worse.

Another good thing was that it was massively relaxing being driven around in a car. It has been a pretty long time since I've been in a car for more than twenty minutes or so. It was so relaxing that I kept falling asleep on the way back. I was enjoying sleeping so much that it was kind of a hassle when we kept stopping to look at animals.

Our guide, Iddi, was a good guy. When he found out about my ESS, he took me to a clinic so that I could get some more tests done. For some reason, they call the test the "widow test". Bodes well. Good news is that I don't have malaria or typhoid. I got some stuff for my cramps and a mystery drug. I kind of think that maybe the mystery drug is going to turn me completely inside out. As long as I turn back the right way in time for getting on my bike, I'm fine with that.

Since I am going to be inverted soon, I figure that I might was well eat as much Indian as possible tonight. Will definitely be a nice change from the bananas and bread that I've been eating to control the cramps. By the way - I definitely recommend this as a good thing. I had no problems with my guts while eating those things, and a banana sandwich with salt (no butter unfortunately) is still a deliciously tasty proposition. Some people say that I didn't look too happy eating one of those sandwiches instead of pasta though.

No photos today, because Tanzanianets are a bit unreliable.

PS. Mystery drug seems to have helped.

Day Two - Namanga to Arusha

2010-03-15T11:59:00.000-07:00

Distance: 117km
Ride time: Dunno, GPS went flat

Today was another border crossing day. Kenya to Tanzania. Stuart and I wanted to get across the border before there was a big queue, so we skipped breakfast and jumped on the bikes pretty early.

Best laid plans and all that. I dunno if I said, but back when we entered Kenya in Moyale, we were told that Australians didn't need to pay for a visa. Well, in whatever this border town is, they have a different idea. They wouldn't give us an exit stamp until we paid for an entry visa - our entry stamp wasn't enough. This took long enough that there was a big line at the Tanzanian entry office. To show them who had the moral upper ground, I took their pen.

Waiting around wasn't too bad though. Our race time didn't start until we checked in on the Tanzanian side, so we weren't losing ground. Plus, I got to have a nap on the floor of their office while I was waiting.

The ride itself was a bit of mixed bag. The scenery was spectacular. Mount Meru started off as a peak way off on the horizon and turned into a skyline dominating juggernaut. Awesome stuff. The less good stuff was that a lot of construction is going on at the moment, so there was a lot of dirt diversions. After yesterday's wet tar adventures, I was less keen on risking riding on the construction zones.

Out of lunch, there 14km climb across the foothills of Mount Meru. No crazy gradients, just a constant 1 - 4%. This doesn't sound like much, but it can wear you down. Today was also warm enough that I was dripping sweat from my face and elbows. I actually like this feedback that I am working hard.

Arusha itself seems to be a pretty big town. We rode around the CBD (I guess to avoid the worst of the traffic) but even so I saw some tall buildings and even traffic lights. I am so used to the craziness of North Africa, that I busted right through the first set of traffic lights. Apart from that, the ride through (or around) town to camp was the normal gauntlet of minibuses and trucks wanting to run me over. And honking. So much honking.

I didn't hang around the campsite much. Instead I jumped in Ted's shuttle - he seems to acquire stuff like this by magic - and came over to the Arusha Hotel. Since we are at the halfway point of the tour, I am having a holiday. The suite here is pretty nice. Couple of bathrooms, separate study and a sweet flatscreen TV. I even got a cold towel and a couple of glasses of orange juice while I was checking in. There are some advantages to turning up clad in sweating, dusty lycra, splattered in tar and cuts. Plus, a bowl of fruit to eat.

The ride before my GPS went flat.

Day One - Nairobi to ONA Camp at Namanga

2010-03-15T11:22:00.000-07:00

Distance: 156km
Ride time: 5:45
Climb: 947m

The first half of today was probably the strongest that I have felt on the bike for a couple of weeks. Having lost a bunch of weight during the sickness (85kg now) but getting over it means that I can push up hills pretty good on the bike.

For about 40km, I thought that I might have a crack at a stage win. I was out in front of the group and feeling strong. Unfortunately, there was some pretty rough pavement and my saddle sores really fired up. After that, I could really only pedal standing up. Still made pretty good time, but I got passed by the one-legged Kenya, Gerry and Marcel in pretty short order. After lunch, Tim caught up with me as well. What I didn't know was that Jethro had also left early and was waaaaaay out in front. Still - it felt good to be strong for a change.

The funniest thing about the ride was the construction zones. There was a diversion road off the side, but it looked pretty sandy and rocky. Instead I opted for riding on the road under construction, like that life saving road back in Northern Kenya. This worked out pretty well for the first bit. A mixture of fresh tar and hard pack dirt meant that I could haul along - outpacing the 4wds and stuff on the diversion road.

The plan only really came unstuck when I saw some tar with water on top of it up ahead. Well, I thought it was tar with water on top. It was actually wet tar. If you haven't been stupid enough to ride on wet tar, I can fill you in. Firstly, you will notice that wet tar is being flung up at you. This will coat your bike (including the drive chain) in tar. Secondly, it is slippery as all get up. I managed to stay upright, but a couple of riders had some falls.

I got into camp pretty early. Instead of getting to sit around the campground drinking cokes and talking crap, I spent hours and hours trying to get the tar off myself and my bike. We sent a guy into town to buy 10l of petrol to clean with. I used a couple myself to clean my drive chain and body.

If anyone from Bike Culture is reading: don't click on this picture - it will only make you sad.

Day Zero - Rest Day in Nairobi

2010-03-15T10:48:00.000-07:00

Hmmm. This is day was probably the least that I have seen of any of the capitals. The Indaba camp is out in the burbs where the ex-pats live. This meant that there were pretty sweet shopping centres close by. The transition from scarcity to plenty has been pretty rapid. As recently as Isiolo, we were having trouble buying our snacks and shaving stuff. Here, there is so much, we wouldn't be able to carry it if we bought everything we wanted.

One thing I definitely did want was a new iPod. I destroyed mine back in Addis when I let a jacket drip into my tent. If I want to listen to music on the bike (and I do) I have to juggle the battery life in my iPhone. If I run it down, I don't have an alarm or a way to call for help. An iPod with 40 hours playback time is way better. The local supermarket sold little shuffles, but that would be just as bad I think.

Instead, Rod, Julliana, Steph and I took the trip out to the Yaya Centre. This place sounded like the mecca of shopping centres. It was indeed pretty good. I got a new 160gb class, and Rod got a super cheap 120gb. I hooked him up with a playlist of angry man music and so he is pretty happy. I've rarely seem him around camp without at least one headphone in. They also have proper food here. We went to a cafe for lunch and ate ourselves silly. I even got a couple of chocolate milkshakes (sadly missing since Khartoum) and another homemade spider. Delicious.

Rod and Julianna enjoying food.

My breakfasts. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. So have it twice. Then have another chocolate milkshake.

Apart from that, I did nothing really except sit in a lawn chair and read the economist. It was actually kind of funny. I was telling the people at lunch that I really wanted an inflatable chair to sit on. When we were driving back from the mall, there were a bunch of dudes selling hats on the side of the road. Since we were stuck in traffic, I bought one (my leather hat has definitely seen better days). I was pretty busy haggling and paying, so I didn't pay much attention when the guys in the back of the taxi (I was in the fat man seat once more) said "Look Dan. Inflatable Telly Tubby Chairs!" I kind of thought that they were taking the piss as well. By the time I looked up, we were already actually past the guy selling that sweet Telly Tubby merchandise. Oh well. I probably couldn't move it around on the trucks anyways.

Other news. Our old Indaba crew is no more. Janet, Ferdi, Errol and Peterson are back to the real world. It will be strange without those guys. We see such a small group, any change is pretty disruptive. When sectionals arrive or leave, it is big news.

The Ride So Far

2010-03-13T03:28:00.001-08:00

Some quick stats.

I've ridden 5,158km since I landed in Cairo (plus a tiny bit more when my GPS was flat). Total climb has been 31,259m. That is about 5000m more than someone told me was in the whole tour.

Snacks

2010-03-13T01:55:00.000-08:00

One thing that I have only mentioned in passing is snacks. This subject is so important in North Africa that it deserves more than a Camping Tip. When you are on a bush camp or desert camp or any camp with less than a market nearby (which is most days before Kenya) the only way to get a sugary snack is to bring it with you. TDA provides heaps of really good food - but none of it is a snack. And if you are big and hungry there can be a long time between your bowls of soup and dinner. The thing to do is to find a good supermarket (not so super outside the capital cities) and buy ten times as much as you think that you can eat. I pretty rarely eat chocolate at home, but over here, all bets are off (Africa == Drunkeness). The picture is what I would consider an adequate supply for a normal six day gap between towns.

Pro tip: form a group of people to swap snacks with. Variety is the spice of life.

Day Five - Mike Savage Safari Camp to Nairobi

2010-03-13T01:54:00.000-08:00

Distance: 136.50km
Ride time: 6:37
Climb: 1606m

Non-race day. Yay.

I was kind of surprised to find out that we had 1600m of climb for the day. And that there was a convoy half-way through the day.

To avoid the fast people having to wait for _all_ the slow people to turn up at the convoy start, there were going to be three convoys. The first 15 would head off with Chris, the mechanic, and probably make good time. Each subsequent group would be slower and have to wait longer to get going. That meant that for a non-race day there was a bit of pressure to still make good time up the hills. I wasn't really too keen on this, what with the stomach cramps and all. Instead, I set off pretty early and tried to get a head start. Even so, it was only a couple of hills before Stuart and Gizi caught up to me.

I would have been happy to ride by myself. I think that I could have gone an easy, comfortable pace and still made the first convoy. Gizi figured that we might as well ride as a group though - being a non-race day and all. This meant that I had to ride a bit faster than I felt good at and Stuart and to ride a bit slower. Oh well.

We made it to the lunch stop and convoy start with plenty of time to spare. Enough time to chow down on some really nice honeydew melon and eat a mango. Then I got some Africa cold cokes and we had those. I think that this was my fatal mistake.

By the end of the convoy (only one flat: Jethro, and one broken bike: Marcel) I was feeling pretty terrible. For about five minutes I would feel strong and could power along. Then I'd have cold sweats and stomach cramps for the next 20 minutes. Not ideal for riding up heaps of hills (the outskirts of Nairobi are pretty hilly) and through a lot of traffic.

Apart from the cramps, it was a pretty nice day of riding. We had a sweet section of dual carriageway before lunch that was packed with real rollers. Could fall out of the sky like a fiery meteorite (well it feels like that to me), wait until the speed dropped below 50 then power back up the next hill. Some of them were just the right size to stay in my hardest gear all the way to the top. Others I had to spin a bit. They were all fun though.

Even the cramp inducing, heavily trafficked hills on the outskirts of Nairobi were pretty nice. Plenty of views across the suburbs and hills.

I even saw a car coming down a hill get massively sideways, locking up all four wheels. I'm not sure what they were trying to do, but heaps of the Kenyan drivers are pretty keen overtakers. It wouldn't surprise me if they had just had to emergency brake before they flew through the safety barrier and sailed into space.

Rod's Camping Tip: Bring earplugs. When the party is still going at 2am or the person next to you is letting them rip - you will definitely want them. Pro tip: good airlines will give you free ones on your flight over. Etihad will even give you a nice soft case with your airplane socks, eye mask and ear plugs.

Day Four - Nanyuki to Mike Savage Safari Camp

2010-03-12T09:07:00.000-08:00

Distance: 103.58km
Ride time: ~4hrs
Climb: 592m (but descended 1397m)

"Oh my god. Now I understand what we are doing." - Gizi

So today started out as a pretty sweet ride. Rolling hills with a serious downwards trend. I was definitely feeling the effects of a couple of good nights sleep. We started off riding to the equator. Well, to a sign that said it was on the equator. Our GPSs had a different story. Anyway, pictures were taken. If I had my act together, I would post one. I don't though, so just imagine a birdlike stick figure with a giant head covered in half shaved stubble. Standing below a peeling sign proclaiming one to be on the equator.

Back to the riding. Sweet indeed. We were ripping along at an awesome pace. I was feeling super strong on the hills, carrying plenty of speed into the bases and pushing up to the top. Then my chain wrapped itself around my spokes. That's cool, just takes some time to slip the chain off and put it back on. While half the people we just smashed by ride on past. Off again on the chase. Then my chain slips off the front chain ring as I stood to pedal. Foot comes off the pedal and hits the ground. Ouch. Back off the bike. Send Stuart and Gizzy on ahead. Fix bike. Start riding again. Have to take it easy in case chain comes off again. It does.

There was a bit of a climb to lunch, but it was definitely worth it. There was a crate of mangoes waiting to be eaten and I was on a forced slow day, so pretty awesome.

Two delicious mangoes later (I know how to peel and eat them well after helping in the kitchen so much) I was on my way. Still pretty fast day, even taking care of my chain. At one point near the end, I got stuck behind a semi doing around 35km/hr. This was just slightly too slow for me on a -1% grade. I waited for a clear stretch of road then started my over taking move. A semi is much longer than it seems from behind. I got about halfway along and felt myself slipping, so I let out a massive hulk roar, literally yelling as loud as I could and pushed past before the oncoming traffic got too close. That truck ended up being within 200m of me the whole rest of the ride, like something out of Terminator 2.

Camp was super sweet. It was 2km down a dirt road on the banks of the Tana river. It was at a safari camp, so it had amenities, including a bar with Africa cold cokes. The best bit was that we could go white water rafting. I was a bit hesitant at first, because I can't really swim.

Turns out that they have special white helmets for people like me that can't swim, so they know who to fish out first.

The rafting was really, really good. With all the rain that we rode through, the water was really high. We got to do some Grade 4 / 4+ (they rate them themselves though) and mucked around a bit. We kept trying to ride the standing wave at the bottom of one rapid. Gizi got thrown out on the first two attempts, then me on the next. On the final go, we flipped the whole raft and all ended up in the drink. Then we did this thing where we climbed onto a rock next to the rapid and jumped in. Pretty neat. Because our guide spoke really fast English, Gizi didn't really understand what we were doing until it was too late to chicken out. Hence the quote. It was cool though.

The best thing was: at first, falling in seemed like a freaking catastrophe. By the end though (when we flipped out going doing the last big rapid backwards) it just seemed like normal. I guess that I am used to it now.

Day Four - Isiolo to Nanyuki

2010-03-12T08:17:00.000-08:00

Distance: 70.58km
Ride time: 4:28 (includes french toast eating time)
Climb: 1417

So. Today was pretty funny. I was still feeling and looking like a very sick thing. I had started Cipro the night before though and I was already feeling heaps better. It is like some sort of magic drug.

I guess I was looking bad enough that Gizzy thought I might loose EFI that day, so she decided to ride along for moral support. If anyone has ever had me give them moral support, you'd have a good idea how Gizzy does it. Basically she rides alongside either laughing at how slow you are going or not letting you stop. At one point into the massive 40km climb, I really wanted to take off my rain jacket because I was too hot. I got to the point of stopping one point unclipped when Gizzy said "I think that we can make a break at the T-junction". That junction was another 6km up the road. When we got there, as well as taking off my jacket I took a drink of electrolyte drink. Gizzy: "What are we going to stop for a picnic here?"

Pretty funny stuff.

Eventually we made it to the top of the climb. I tested the limits of Cipro drinking a whole bunch of different types of juice. Delicious, delicious juice. Not the reconstituted powder juice we could buy before, but proper juice in little cartons. I should say that Ethiopia had good juice though - mango, pineapple and avocado. So thick that you have to eat it with a spoon.

The good news was that I didn't give up on the ride, even when I was going 6km an hour. The even better news was that it was french toast for lunch. The best news was that we were camping at a hotel next to a British Army base. It was a proper hotel that knew how to make food and had electricity (almost all the time). The room was so big, we watched Always Sunny in Philadelphia in style while writing blogs and doing email. Civilisation is grand.

Plus, with Cipro I can eat again - so I had a mixed grill, a homemade coke spider (order vanilla icecream and a coke) and then we had awesome sausage and pasta salad for normal, TDA dinner. Excellent stuff.

Cipro and being ridiculed by a tiny little German definitely got me through the day. Gizzy was so hyper from laughing at me by the end that she was like a little crazy person. Frightening stuff.

Day Three - Highway Camp to Isiolo

2010-03-10T07:52:00.000-08:00

Distance: 81.16km
Ride time: 3:44

So, I set out with high hopes for the day. The prospect of only six or seven ks of dirt until sweet pavement practically had my heart racing.

I started out pretty slowly - rolling along looking at stuff. Once we hit the sweet, sweet pavement though, I felt like going faster. I only stopped to look at this thing. It looked like a massive rock ship rotating out of the fog.

The rest of the day was pretty easy. Still feeling weak and pushing my massive tires didn't seem like fun, but it was nice to not be grovelling along. Made it to camp in pretty good time, so I had plenty of time to get a room for the night. I also spent a lot of time trying to get my bike clean. This was harder than it sounds when it is that muddy. Here is a pic of my bike during the muddy day.

It got even muddier than this on the next day. Crazy muddy.

With the sickness, I was pretty unenthusiastic about the whole cleaning bikes and changing tires things. I did a pretty shitty job of it, then just put my bike in the rain. I did put my Duranos on for the upcoming pavement. Then one of the tires blew up. So I called in one of the many tire changes I have done for other people and had them change it for me. Sweet.

The room was pretty good. The electricity came on and off, but the shower and toilet worked. It was probably the best nights sleep I have had all tour as well. Seven straight hours. Sweet. At 2230, they put the music on quietly in the bar. That was all good. But they also put the music on really loudly in the garden, right next to the rooms. I left it until I was good and mad at 2300 then went down to get them to turn it off. Or down. Or something. Long story short, I let loose the anger monster on those guys.

Dan's Camping Tip: Why camp when you can sleep under a mosquito net in a warm dry room.

Day Two - Field Camp to Highway Camp

2010-03-10T07:39:00.000-08:00

Distance: 87.65km
Ride time: 7:05
Climb: 625m

This was a pretty grinding day. I woke up after a couple of hours of sleep to find out that it was raining. I decided to wait it out and see if it stopped, but by the time I absolutely, positively had to get up it was raining even harder. Plus, everyone was already up and standing around the truck so they got to watch my inept attempt at a rain takedown of my tent. It was not a resounding success.

Anyway, no breakfast then on the bikes. Sand and corrugations where the order for the day. This wasn't too bad. For the first 300m. Then I hit the real bad roads. The bad roads, constant incline and rain made for a pretty miserable time on the bike. Since we were going uphill, the best place to ride was often the stream of rain water coming down the hill. Needless to say, our bikes are pretty knackered now. I've also got Ethiopian Shitting Sickness, so I was off the bike pretty often. Stripping off the jersey and bibs in the rain and sand is an unforgettable experience.

Eventually I caught up with some riders going as slow as me. This was kind of good, because I got some company riding along at the glacial pace I was going. And it wasn't people that I would normally talk to. First Dana, who has some pretty well thought out plans for post-ride life. Then Steph, who was as angry as usual, but has some good stories.

The riding got a bit better after lunch. The Chinese are busy building the road from Isiolo out to Marsabit. We had about 20km of not quite road, but built up road bed and newish detour roads. This was awesome. Instead of sand and corrugations. We had hard pack with massive puddles. Deep enough to come up to our knees as we rode through. Did I mention that our bikes are screwed?

Finally, after a very long day, we made it to the camp on the side of the new highway. Because of all the rain, it was pretty muddy everywhere. The quick guys had managed to grab a shower with the water collected in the tarp. Slow pokes like me had to make do with washing down using muddy water out of puddles on the road. Being in Africa for this long is a bit like being drunk - you are going to do things and eat things that you normally wouldn't do.

The campground was pretty spectactular. We had views from the escarpment we were on across the plain to the next set of hills. Really cool.

In rider meeting, we were told that we had 25-30km of unpaved (but under construction) road until the pavement. This would have been ok. Then, whlie we were sitting around talking crap, some honkies in a 4wd pulled up to say hello. They told us that there was only six or seven kilometres to go. I didn't want to get my hopes up, but this sounded sweet.

Dan's Camping Tip: When you are doing a rain take down, you don't have to methodically fold up your poles while your tent inner gets soaked on the muddy ground. Unless you are the bumbling comedy relief for the tour. Then go ahead.

Day One - Marsabit to Field Camp

2010-03-10T07:30:00.000-08:00

Distance: 95.3km
Ride time: 6:23

So, this ride was pretty nice. I am still slow as all get up. Between the cold and a bunch of niggles, I can't generate much power in my legs. This has been pretty good practice for high cadence riding. Well, higher than my usual stomping mash.

We had a tiny bit of climbing on the wet dirt roads (I forgot to say that it rained pretty heavily the night before) then headed all the way downhill to lunch at 55km.

This wasn't totally straightforwards though. There are still plenty of corrugations (no lava rocks though) and the mud was out of this world. On some of the uphills, I had to scoot along - the mix of wet mud and cow crap
was so slippery that I couldn't spin my way up. In other places, my fat tires didn't have enough frame clearance to shed mud fast enough. I had to get off a bunch of times and push mud out with my fingers to be able to turn the wheels again. I thought that the Gravity 12hour was bad that one year, but this was something else again. If a few big trucks hadn't gone through and squished a lot of the mud out of the way, the road would have been impassable. With a clear path though, it made the riding pretty fun.

It actually felt a bit like proper mountain biking, picking a nice path and maintaining traction. I should say, trying to maintain traction though - at one point I had to made an impromptu dismount off my bike. It was pretty sweet though. Something has loosened my too tight pedals, so I unclipped and jumped sideways off my bike like a freaking ballerina. The sort of thing that I couldn't do if I tried.

Straight out of lunch, I came across a sorry sight. A massive water hole in the road with two bogged trucks. One of them was the normal cattle trucks that we see charging up and down the road, loaded with people in the back. This was being pushed out by an army of Kenyan dudes. The other was the old dinner truck (since replaced) heading back from Gondor to Nairobi. It looked well stuck, the front wheels dangling in water (I guess - water here is nice and muddy) and the fuel tanks resting on a rock. No one pushing that sucker.

Our three trucks made it here ok though. According to Ferdi, the driving was "fun".

I saw the Spanish girls in their impractical, free van on the muddy road. I thought that they had stopped to take photos (of me looking stylish, naturally) but it turns out that they were just broken down. Again. Luckily for them, one of the TDA staffers has developed a bit of a soft spot for them. He rides along behind the van. If there is a hard section to drive, he does it for them. If they break down, he helps out. Pretty cute stuff.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you put your tent up early in a big open space, a corollary of Murpy's Law says that the loudest snorers, smelliest farters and most unrelenting whiners will camp around you.

Day Zero - Rest Day in Marsabit

2010-03-10T07:28:00.000-08:00

So, the Catholic Camping Ground was pretty much the best rest day camping spot ever. Instead of surly Ethiopians we had efficient and pleasant nuns (or sisters?) helping us out. One even looked exactly like Whoopie Goldberg.

Like I already said, I got a room at the camping ground. This was awesome. Clean and tidy. No private shower or toilet, but that is pretty much par for the course out here. Electricity on demand is totally awesome though. It means that you can run and charge all your stuff and know that you are going to be able to recharge it for the next riding stint. It also makes Movie Afternoon a lot simpler. Instead of finding a room with seats and power, we already have one. Then it is just a matter of choosing what movie to watch. I swear, it is almost as bad as the olden days at a video store, wandering up and down the aisles for ages. But instead of almost inevitably picking a Jackie Chan movie of often dubious quality, we watched Rock N Rolla. I remembered this being pretty funny before, but it seems to have lost a lot of its charm. The best bit is definitely Super Hans from Peep Show.

But I digress. Movie reviews can wait until I have given up on riding. Back to how awesome the sisters were.

A big part of rest days is normally spent trying to accomplish these things.

1. Eating enough food.
2. Cleaning bikes.
3. Doing laundry.
4. Buying snacks.
5. Doing internet.

The nuns took care of two of these things for us. Instead of the normal charging around town looking for dinners and lunches and breakfasts, those of us that wanted sat down in a big hall and ate a lot of pretty decent Kenyan food. It tasted pretty good and for some reason, food prepared by nuns seems like it must be clean food. For all I know there were dropping it on the floor and picking it back up, but it definitely had an aura of cleanliness. Some people were a bit annoyed (like walk out annoyed) that there wasn't enough food on the first night, but on the second night they did a much better job of making sure that there was enough. Plus, some people on this tour have reached the point were they are mad about everything.

One person though rocked up on the second night and told the nuns that they couldn't eat meat, so could they please cook them some eggs. This person has been eating meat the whole time so yeah.

The nuns also did the laundry for a pretty decent price. I was too knackered after the ride to organise mine though, so I ended up doing it the next day.

So, with the nuns taking care of those things, we didn't have much pressure on us in town. Just had to pick up snacks, and this is way easier in Kenya than in Yabello and Moyale. Instead of packs of glucose biscuits, they have Cadburys chocolate. Pretty sweet. Oh yeah, and choctops. I ate so many choctops.

Besides the boring cleaning bikes, that really only leaves the internet. In Ethiopia (here I go again) this was pretty sucky. Not only was every connection outside Addis molasses slow, but they also try to censor blogger.com over there, so posting was a huge hassle. Here in Kenya, we can by CDMA modems to plug straight into laptops, and happily post and email from the middle of the desert. It is kind of like being back in a real country, like Sudan.

Day Five - Lava Rock Camp to Marsabit

2010-03-06T03:18:00.000-08:00

Distance: 86.76km
Ride time: 7:34 (yes, really)
Climb: 927m

Best part: Keeping EFI.
Worst part: Still have EFI - will have to keep riding everyday.

Hooray for Mando days. This was definitely the hardest day of the tour so far. Plenty of rocks, sand and corrugations.

The first 30 odd kilometres up to lunch weren't too bad. It was possible to get a bit of rhythm and momentum. After lunch though, we started to head up hill. This meant that there was no respite from the road surface. I ended up having to stop every 5km to drink and eat - the surface was mostly too rough to try to eat on the bike. On the upside, this meant that I could take plenty of photos.

The scenery was pretty spectacular. In the morning, we were pushing across a plain towards some hills. The further we went, the less desert like it was. Once we got across the plain and into the hills, everything was green. Definitely neat. I dunno if it was neat enough to spend seven and a half hours on a bike though.

The ride today was so hard and unrewarding that it isn't something that I would ever ride it by choice. I would be much more inclined to ride Dindir again. I'm not sure what made this day harder than Dindir, but it definitely was. Part of it was that the road often had four or more channels were the trucks have been. So it is often quite tempting to see if one of the other channels is easier to ride in. Doing this means either: getting off and pushing your bike over; or, trying to ride over the pile of loose rock that separates the channels. The loose rocks have claimed a lot of skin from people's elbows and knees - mine included. Mostly, this is because I still haven't reduced the amount of force required to snap out of my pedals. I often end up teetering for a second, frantically trying to unclip before falling over. Then I am lying on my side, still clipped into my bike. Then I thrash around for a while until I get unclipped and upright. Dignity. Dignity above all else.

Today was also a good day for truck riding. People were putting their bikes on the trucks the night before. One guy said that he felt fine with it, because he'd ridden for the previous two whole days (I guess riding the truck before that) and so he "had nothing to prove." I dunno if any day, or any two days on this tour would be that hard. Today still wouldn't have been any fun, but I wouldn't have been carrying a body full of niggles and whatnot from the last 40 days of riding. But, whatever floats those guys boats I guess. Everyone says that the trucks aren't that fun to ride anyway. Today they weren't going that much faster than I was on my bike. Plus they must be full of the stench of failure.

We are spending our rest day in Marsabit camped in a Catholic Camping Ground. Because I still have a pretty bad cold, I got a room for the two nights. It is a pretty nice room for the 1000 shillings I am paying. Bed, sink, desk and electricity. There is also a glow in the dark jesus and an alpha and omega above the door. Becaue I was still sick with a cold and wiped out after the long day, I went to sleep at 7 o'clock. It was pretty relaxing to wake up at 5am and see the rain coming down outside, being warm and dry.

Dan's Camping Tip: Once you are out of Ethiopia and no longer constrained by the perimeter, you don't have to camp 2 feet away from people anymore.

Gerald's Africa Tip: Eat first. Then look at the kitchen.

The Mr Dan's Awesome Drink Recipe

2010-03-04T03:17:00.000-08:00

After a couple of months of research and development, I am pretty close to perfecting my after ride and evening drink. Originally, it was just Ovaltine with some Baby Grow Now formula. The new recipe is:

2 tbsp of Ovaltine
6 tbsp of fortified milk powder (ideally this should be some Ethiopian brand)
3 tbsp sugar
1 tbsp instant coffee
100ml boiling water
500ml milk

1. Put all these scoops in a bidon (that's a water bottle to people less professional cyclist than me).
2. Add boiling water.
3. Put the lid back on your bidon and shake it around to dissolve all the granules of the various bits and bobs. BE CAREFUL: boiling water in an enclosed space and shaking can be bad.
4. Take the lid off. You should have a smooth liquid.
5. Add the milk. Put the lid on and shake it again.

You should now have a deliciously chocolately, coffee drink.

Day Four - Sololo Camp to Lava Rock Camp

2010-03-04T03:07:00.000-08:00

Distance: 84.5km
Ride time: 4:59

Best part: Boy Scouts' Coke Stop.
Worst part: Falling over. Again.

So, we have finally seen the bad stuff for Northern Kenya. It's bad, but it's not Dindir bad. The lava rocks are just like any other rocks. The first half of the day was actually pretty ok - corrugations and sand and occasional patches of rocks.

After the climb to lunch, we basically spent the next 40km descending. It sure didn't feel like that though. With the rocks out in full force and a bit of a head wind, it was hard going.

The best bit of the day was the coke stop just after lunch. Because I only had a 1000 stirling note, they didn't have enough change if I only bought the two drinks. This was pretty awesome though, because it meant that I had to buy a third coke. This was a great later on, because 10km before the end of the ride Gizzy and I cracked it out, sat in the shade underneath a tree and had a break. Ideal for a lazy day on the bikes.

The view from the first coke stop.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you see and kill a scorpion in the night, keep your shoes inside your tent over night. And keep your tent zipped up.

Day Three - Moyale Wildlife Services Camp to Sololo Camp

2010-03-03T01:54:00.000-08:00

Distance: 77.62km
Ride time: 3:15
Climb: 141m (No longer in Ethiopia)

Best thing: First half was all downhill. Plenty of scope for big dogging it.
Worst thing: False impression of how hard rest of ride to Nairobi will be.

Best song of the day: Jib Ride by Haik Naltchayan

So, the first day of the off road section was a pretty gentle introduction. Only a couple of real corrugated sections and no real climbs. According to the rider briefing tonight, we'll see the first of the bad stuff tomorrow after lunch.

The very first section was so easy that I felt inclined to photo people as they went by. Here is Gisi saying that she isn't enjoying it.

I was kind of joking in camp that we would be at lunch in two hours and done before noon. If it had been a truly bad dirt road, this would have been ridiculous. As it turns out, I was pretty much on the money for me. For the faster guys, it was an even quicker day. Even the slower guys on mountain bikes are starting to work out that they can push the boat out on the dirt sections - small compensation for the 11,000km of paved road though.

One guy was asking whether he should be landing the jumps on the back wheel or not. I was pretty confused about why he was asking - was he thinking about doing more mtbing when he got back, and had confused me for someone that might know? Turns out that on the concreted depressions he was getting an inch or two of air. This is probably not enough air for him to be worrying much about technique. More than I was on my steel tank though.

Talking about which, now that I have my 2" tires on, my bike looks pretty ridiculous. It still rolls along pretty well, but I don't think that I would like to ride it on anything remotely technical. It stops like an oil tanker and turns like, well, an oil tanker or something else that doesn't turn very well. Maybe a Land Sea Dreadnought.

Apart from the obvious differences of riding a mountain bike off road, some little things about my bike are getting more obvious. When I stand on a loose climb, my weight moves waaaay more forwards then on a mountain bike. I kind of wish that I had gotten my act together early enough to get a suspension fork for the Surly. I think that it would make a huge difference on these sections. I kind of like turning up on a fully rigid though. Like a badge of pride / stupidity.

Not much else to say about the day today. Pretty relaxed, plenty of hills and stuff to see. The hills here aren't the soft rounded deals like in Ethiopia, apparently we are in the rift system now so we are seeing a lot of uplift type stuff. If I can get my act together, I'll take a photo for all the rock type people back home.

A bunch of people on the ride today saw baboons, rebels and little dik-diks and what not. I just saw hills. Tomorrow we might see giraffes though, which would be pretty cool.

Sunset at camp. We are in big sky country now, that's for sure.

Dan's Camping Tip: Make sure that you don't have anything on the bite valve of your camel bak when it is in your tent. Unless you want a wading pool to sleep in.

Day Two - Farm Camp to Wildlife Services Camp

2010-03-02T09:55:00.001-08:00

Distance: 79.94km
Ride time: 2:53km

Best thing: Learning how to peel and cube a mango.
Worst thing: Nothing really.

Best shuffled song: Illusionary Lines by the Hilltop Hoods

"From now on you won't be ferengis. You will be muzungas" - Sharita

And with that, we set out to cross the border between Ethiopia and
Kenya. It seems pretty strange that we are done with Ethiopia. It's
been such a crazy country. It seems like so much stuff has happened
here compared to Sudan. The hills. The burger sickness. Hating the
kids and the whole country. Learning to deal with the bad bits and
enjoy the good bits. The awesome mando day, full of hills and rain and
awesomeness.

I don't know. In some ways, I am sad to see the hills go - I was
really starting to enjoy climbing, albeit at my slow, fat man pace. On
the other hand, I won't miss the rocks being thrown and the constant
crowding around the perimeter line. I guess it is what it is. If you
can get over the bad bits, there is some great riding to be had, and
some great things to see.

Sharita, one of the joint tour directors, rode through here solo and
unsupported. After the mayhem at our camps, I can't imagine how she
did it. I asked one of the Indaba guys, and they just said "You
haven't seen Sharita when she is angry, have you?" Sounds like the
judicious unleashing of anger is part of the trick, but I don't see
how that could work for weeks at a time. Would it still be fun? Even
if you are just pretending to be angry?

The ride to the border was so short today that it is barely worth
mentioning. The neatest thing about it was the few climbs up towards a
heavy, leaden sky. It always seemed on the verge of raining but never
did.

Two big events in camp though. Firstly, the truck that we left behind
in Gondor has arrived with its new engine. Janet was pretty happy to
see Ferdi, who stayed behind in Gondor with the trucks, and I imagine
that the Indaba and TDA staff might be a little battle damaged
tomorrow morning. We are going to keep the replacement christmas tree
truck as well as the just back dinner truck. The reason for this is
that the fixed truck no longer has a bike rack on the top, so it can
carry fewer people and bikes, and now that we are in Northern Kenya we
are going to need that space.

Which segues nicely into the other big event: tomorrow we are hitting
the worst roads of the tour. Rock, corrugations and sand. When people
were complaining about Dinder, one of the TDA people is rumoured to
have muttered "What are they going to do when we get to Kenya?" I
suppose that we are going to find out. So around camp everyone is
changing to their beefiest tires and doing all the bike maintenance
that they have been putting off.

Exciting times, that's for sure.

Oh yeah, and we are now in Kenya.

Peeling a mango if actually pretty easy. And mango salsa as part of a
breakfast burrito for dinner, in Kenya, is pretty awesome.

Dan's Camping Tip: Don't spend 2 weeks wondering why water sometimes
drips water from your tent poles into your inner before looking at
your fly and realising it has velcro straps to stop exactly that
happening. Briefly: know your gear.

Day One - Yabello to Farm Camp

2010-03-02T09:54:00.001-08:00

Distance: 127.1km
Ride time: 4:45
Climb: 912m

Best thing: Hacking apart the frozen meat blocks.
Worst thing: No truck with luggage.

After staying up to 1am listening to people watching the gold medal
hockey game in the hotel's bar, I was pretty tired, so decided to take
it slow and see how I went. The rider briefing said that there was a
30km climb out of lunch up to the town of Mega, so I was pretty
reluctant to push it in the morning.

Well, it turned out that the 30km climb was actually around 15km of
around a 5% grade. So pretty cruisy really. And once I got to the top,
there was an awesome view down through a cleft in the hills, over Mega
and towards the border. There was also a cool ruined fort or
something. The strange thing is, even on going slow days, I can't bear
to stop for five minutes and have a look around or take any photos. I
could also see the rain clouds all over the plain that we were going
to be camping on.

That rain started pretty soon after I got into camp. Bad news. The
christmas tree truck, with all of the racers' luggage on it, had
broken down at lunch and wasn't expected for a while. This meant that
we had no tents to shelter in and only whatever wet weather gear we'd
carried on our camelbaks. Luckily, I brought rain pants and a riding
shell. Unluckily, I'd unzipped the hood for the shell back in
Australia and left it in the boot of my car, so I got a pretty wet
head sitting in the rain. Ok, that wasn't unlucky, it was stupid. Some
people brought no wet weather gear though so they got cold and
sheltered in the truck.

Most days, I get in early enough from the ride to help out with the
kitchen. This is normally pretty boring - washing carrots or peeling
garlic. Today started off that way as well. Peeling carrots. But,
after the carrots there was meat prep to do. This would have been
pretty boring as well, but the meat blocks hadn't thawed yet, so I got
to spend half and hour wrestling with steaks, strips of fat and chunks
of bone. It is kind of satisfying to be tearing that apart with your
bare hands, then look down and just see cubes of meat.

Dan's Camping Tip: Always know where these things are before you go to
sleep: your shoes; your headlamp; your toilet paper / baby wipes; and,
your toilet paper / baby wipes burning lighter.

Day Zero - Rest Day in Yabello

2010-03-02T09:49:00.001-08:00

With so few amenities in town, the rest day was probably the most
relaxed yet. Couldn't do any internet, no internet. Couldn't do
washing, too rainy.

Stuart and I managed to find some snacks in a supermarket that hadn't
already been cleaned out. Oh yeah. The day before, a couple of the
unrepentant truck riders had planned to ride the truck all the way to
camp so that they could get into town early and get a jump on the
snacks. This pissed some of the other people off - one guy a whole lot
- but I think it is a fair trade for not getting to ride a bike. And
missing out on fried egg sandwiches the day before. But anyway, we got
enough snacks to last until the next rest day, and I got a bunch of
milk powder with additives for infants. To make sure that I don't fade
away.

Talking of which. I weighed myself on a dodgy scale in town. 90kg.
Still pretty fat man for riding up hills. Ten percent loss in seven
weeks is pretty good though.

After getting snacks, we had a look around. We found some fried,
folded bread filled with lentils for breakfast, so we grabbed some of
those. We also found little coffee place, so we had some coffee and
watched the rain outside. Then we got more bread lentil things. Then
back to the hotel for second breakfast.

With the rain, the rest of the day followed the same theme. Back into
town for more meateronies and coffees (even awesome macciattos). Then
four plates of spaghetti for dinner.

Day Five - Field Camp to Yabello

2010-03-02T09:47:00.001-08:00

Distance: 120.8km
Ride time: 4:56
Climb: 1277

Best thing: Fried egg sandwiches for lunch.
Worst thing: No hot water.

By far the best part of the day today was that Janet, the Indaba
liaison that looks after lunch, had arranged to give us delicious
fried egg, avocado, and tomato sandwiches. For most people this was a
surprise, but I found out the night before. This was only because I
was helping out peeling garlic in the kitchen while they were talking
about it. Being sworn to secrecy about something so exciting was
pretty hard.

The sandwiches were definitely worth it though. Fried egg plus ketchup
is such a good combination. In the middle of Ethiopia it is even
better.

The change in scenery from the hills to the lowlands or whatever we
are on now is pretty different. In the space of about 50km we went
from hills covered in farms and foliage to red soil, 10m termite
mounds and nomadic cattle herders. I find it a lot less interesting.
Once you've seen one termite mound, you've pretty much seen them all.

When we got into Yabello, we found that camping spots were pretty
limited. There were "deluxe" rooms for 500 birr ($45) a night. I
sprung for one of those in the hope of getting a warm shower and
charging my stuff hassle free. When I went to have a shower - no hot
water. After a couple of hours, they hadn't managed to get the hot
water going. Plus, all the wiring in the room was hanging out of the
wall, or just kludged on. There was a pristine set of switches for all
the room lights, but it wasn't connected up, so there was a single
light switch dangling above the bed. So, I angered out, got my money
back and set up my tent.

After that, Sunil, Eric, Stuart and I headed into town to find some
dinner. We'd been told that it was about 2km away, so we were looking
for a tuk tuk as we walked along the wet road. Luckily though, one of
the overland tour guides in his 4x4 gave us a lift, pointed us to a
good place to get food and helped us order. No muss, no fuss.

The food place was pretty unreal. Out front there was a little lean-to
that was like tiny butchery. A couple of carcasses hanging up, and a
guy mincing and dicing it. We ordered a kilo of meat for the two of us
eating it, and a fasting plate for the less adventures / weak. The
eating room out the back was dark, had a couple of locals and had a
bar in the back.

Despite the strangeness of the surroundings, the food was awesome. The
meat came out in clay braziers with coals underneath to keep it hot.
There were onions and green chillis mixed into it as well as a really
hot dipping sauce. You fish the meat out of the pot with bits of roll
or injeera. Freaking awesome.

Sunil was sure that we were getting ripped off. We paid 120 odd birr
for the four of us to eat until we were totally full. With only a few
days to go until the border, worrying about thirty birr or whatever
seemed retarded. Particularly after such a good meal.

To top it off, as we were walking back out of town, the overland
operator drove past and gave us another lift. Pretty neat. He said
that a lot of the overland tours stop at the hotel (with the new
"deluxe" rooms) because it is the only half decent place between the
border and Addis Ababa. I guess that overland tours aren't as keen as
us on camping in fields surrounded by one thousand screaming kids.

At around 10pm, I started to feel like maybe getting mad was not a
good move - I could have been in a nice dry room, in a warm bed
instead of in my wet tent in the rain.

But. The next morning, I noticed that a bunch of people were moving
their bags from their rooms out to somewhere else. Apparently, the
deluxe rooms suffer from the same poor to non-existent trademanship as
the rest of Ethiopia. A couple of rooms ended up with a few inches of
water on the floor, one room had so many bugs that they ended up
leaning the beds up against the wall and setting up their tent.

I guess that I felt vindicated not paying for that privilege.

Oh yeah, and their crappy electrics blew the charger for my laptop.
Good game Ethiopia.

Day Four - Farm Camp (aka Pineapple Camp) to ... Field Camp?

2010-03-02T09:46:00.001-08:00

Distance: 106.22km
Ride time: 5:11
Climb: 2125m

Best thing: The whole day.
Worst thing: Day was too short.

Best shuffled song: None. But listened to John Williamson on repeat
for 3 hours and 40 minutes.

Today was the mando day. This is a pretty big hint that something is
afoot. So in the rider meeting when they said big climbs at 30km and
60km people should know that there is going to be some climbing.
Especially when they say "Pssstâ€¦ Ethiopia is hilly."

The hills just made this day even better though. It felt like every
metre I went up, I was just saving that metre away in the altitude
bank for later. Hopefully, we'll be drawing down on that account
tomorrow for the ride into the rest day.

It rained overnight and most of the morning. Some people aren't keen
on riding in the rain, but I love it. Riding along with the rain
cooling me down, and the road spray smashing up around me is awesome.
I didn't go fast today, but it was definitely my favourite stage of
the tour. By far. Riding solo helped, instead of having to ride pace
with the group I could just ride along at my own slow pace.

Part of the awesomeness was the scenery. Because it was raining, the
green hills were cloaked in mist. The smoke from the cooking fires in
the houses filters up through the whole of the thatch roof. It is
crazy stuff. People with a better command of the English language have
described the scenery around here, so maybe check up on what they have
written.

The mist made the hills even better to climb up. The little huts and
plantations along with the mist and lush vegetation made it like
riding through Jurassic Park. Kind of like riding up through
Tallaganda National Park if the weather is wet. Even though there are
a few ranks of hills, only the one closest to us was vaguely visible -
all the other ones were just like dark clouds. Exactly like every
other visitor here has written.

While washing carrots for dinner yesterday, I was talking to Frans
about the kids in Ethiopia. It kind of made me realise that Ethiopia
is a pretty good mirror for yourself. If you let the kids make you
angry and you end up chasing them or hurling rocks, it really reflects
pretty poorly on you. Today, I tried to not let anything get to me. I
rode along saying "Salaam" and "Salaamno" to people, dipping my head
to the people carrying sticks or whatever, and always answering when
people asked "Where are you go?". I'm not sure if it was that, or the
fact that Ethiopians respect the crazed fervour of a guy grinning ear
to ear in the rain, with a face splattered in mud, but I had a much,
much better day with the kids today. The only low point was when I
stopped to take off my rain jacket and a bunch of people came up
around me. It was ok at first, one guy spoke some English (more
English than I speak Amharic) and I was trying to explain about riding
from Egypt to South Africa. Pretty soon though, they started with the
"Give me money!", etc. I just said "Ciao" (Italian influence here and
all) then rode off.

Apart from that, it was pretty nice to be riding along and feel like I
was getting along with people rather than being in some sort of
strange cold war with the locals. I was in such a good mood, that when
I saw a guy putting a fresh coat of mud on the outside of the his
house, I was really tempted to stop, help him out and learn a new
skill. I didn't though, because I was halfway up a fricking massive
hill.

In camp, I felt like drinking heaps of Pepsi. I tried negotiating with
Gizzy to clean her bike for 12 Pepsis, but she wanted a 24 hour
guarantee, and with the weather around here that basically means I
would be spending my rest day cleaning her bike for a second time.
Free. Anyways, I went to buy my own Pepsis. Me and the Pepsi man
counted out 12 Pepsis on the ground, then negotiated a discount,
instead of 12 x 4 Birr, I'd just pay 40 Birr. I paid the money and the
guy helped move the Pepsis to where I was cleaning my bike. 2 minutes
later the guy came back and told him that I still owed him money for
the last two drinks. I'm not really keen on renegotiating stuff after
I've already paid my money. After a few minutes of their baloney, I
told him to take back his Pepsi and give me back my money. He did
that, and wanted me to pay for 2 drinks. I ended up drinking 5 pepsis
for 8 Birr. These guys need to spend more time at school, or at least
be taught street math by Bubbles.

During the normal talking part after riding, Steph / Miss Poor Impulse
Control threw a pen at me. Maybe for a good reason, but even so,
throwing pens is a bit uncalled for. So, I confiscated the pen and
told her that I'd give it back to her only if she didn't get angry at
anyone. So, I guess that this story makes me sound like a real petty
despot retard. I think that I am just a product of the lawless society
that we have here. People are already discussing what the official TDA
prison shank would look like. I think that it would be a PVM bar with
a broken spoke gaffa taped to it.

Dan's Camping Tip from Someone that Knows Nothing of Camping: If
you're expecting to camp in wet weather, get a footprint for your
tent. This means that you can pack away your inner with your fly still
up and keep it dry. Don't. Repeat don't, just get a randomly sized
poncho / groundsheet. Unless you like having a constantly wet tent.

Day Three - Lakeside Beach Camp to Farm Camp

2010-03-02T09:44:00.001-08:00

Distance: 130.35km
Ride time: 5:23
Climb: 1299m

Best thing: Strong in the big ring, chasing the other rider.
Worst thing: Only strong for a while.

So after a pretty good night at the beach camp, I was up for a slow
recovery day. Gizzy was as well, so we set out for a pretty easy ride.
After the rain over night, all the loose sand was nice and grippy, so
the ride back up to the paved road was nice and easy.

Soon after we got to the top, one of the other riders caught up, then
went by on a downhill. On the very next uphill, we went by them. After
this, it didn't really seem like they did a lot of pulling. I'm not
really up on riding etiquette, but I think that starting after other
riders, then riding their draft without pulling is bad form. It didn't
really bother me, because I was out for an easy day, and it isn't much
harder to ride with someone in your draft than not.

About halfway to lunch, Stuart and a bunch of other riders also caught
us up. Lunch was pretty good, big rolls with cheese (a special kind of
processed cheese that they have here), guacamole and tomatoes. Only
down side was that it was being rationed out so that slower riders got
their fair share as well. Seems kind of counter-intuitive to me. It
would be good encouragement for there to be no food for riders who got
in late. That isn't really how TDA rolls though.

That reminds me, we got our new truck at the beach camp. It isn't
fully configured - just a holdover until the truck waiting in Gondor
gets its new engine. There are two problems with that: firstly, it is
the lunch truck (because all the fridge and other dinner kit is still
in the old lunch truck, now dinner truck); and secondly, there is less
space on the trucks for bikes.

My idea for fixing the problem is that people without a real injury
that want to ride the trucks have to buy their seats at an auction.
Any money raised can go into a pool for buying those that ride all day
a coke or something. Some riders think that this would be a good idea.
Mainly the EFIers and people that have had the misfortune to be really
sick on the truck and had to put up with the whining of the
sandbaggers. This isn't something that TDA is really keen on enforcing
though, so it will just have to remain a good (if totally harsh) idea.

Anyway, back to the boring minutia of riding. After lunch, we knocked
straight into a pretty steep climb. About halfway up, I wanted to
change from my granny into my big ring so that I could stomp it out.
The shifter felt a bit stiff, and the chain wasn't climbing up. So I
gave it a bit of welly to get it to go. Twang! I pulled the cable out
of the front derailleur, so I had to granny up the rest of the climb.
When I got to the top, and found a quiet place, I bodged it back
together so that I could put it in the big ring. I didn't really have
any faith in my repair, so I kept it in the big ring for the rest of
the climbs.

Gizzy and Stuart turned around to come and find me. The other rider
that joined us in the morning didn't turn around though. Stuart and I
thought about it for a while, and realised that if the other,
draft-happy, pull-shy rider kept going, they would win the stage. This
didn't sit to well with us, so we kicked it up a notch and started to
chase them down.

We were fanging along, but after about 20km or so, I was starting to
feel the lack of a granny. I sat on Stuart's wheel for a while, but it
seemed pretty slack to be drafting someone while chasing down a
condemned drafter. So Stuart set off after the rider and I sat back to
finish off the ride. Stuart caught the rider before the finish, but
because of the way the timing system works, we don't know who the
stage winner was yet.

Other big news of the day: fresh pineapple for sale by the camp. Even
better than cold cokes.

The rider that fell heavily in my crash yesterday couldn't rider
today. They went off to get x-rays for their bunged up wrist. So
straight away, they lost their EFI status. The x-ray came back clear,
but they are going to have to spend 7-10 days off the bike. Their race
position is definitely going to suffer because of it.

One of the other guys pointed out that I don't blog about anything
useful for people that might do the tour in the future, so from now on
I will give you an awesome camping tip from my new found wealth of
knowledge.

Dan's Camping Tip from Someone that Knows Nothing of Camping: Always
put the fly on your tent. This means that no-one will have to rip
their eyes out if they see you baby wiping your saddle sores. It also
means that when it rains, you don't have to get up at midnight to put
your fly on. The one exception to this is after riding through Dinder
National Park - then all bets are off.

All bets being off reminds me of chairs around camp. We all sit of
folding metal and canvas stools. At first, it was a bit of a faux pas
to ask for your chair back. As time has gone on, chair taking has
become more and more of a no-no, and calling people out on it has
become more acceptable.

Some riders and also the sectional riders haven't caught on to this yet.

Two nights ago, some guy stole Rick's chair. Rick came back and gave
us all a look to let us know what was going on. As he went past, I
said "Hey Rick, isn't that your dishkit under that chair?" It was kind
of pinned by the chair leg, so he said "Oh yeah. Hey Adam, do you mind
staining up for a second so that I can get it?" Adam stood up, and
when he did Rick said "While your up, you can get out of my seat."
Classic.

It wouldn't have been so funny, if Adam hadn't been called out twice
already that night. The seconds line for food also has a bunch of
rules. Well, some of like to think it does. One: you can't get seconds
until open kitchen is called. This is to make sure that every rider
and staff member gets some food - fair enough. Two: you can't line up
for food if you still have food in your bowl - otherwise, you'd just
go straight to the front of the seconds line.

That night, like every night really, Stuart finished first so he was
at the front of the seconds line waiting for open kitchen. Apparently,
Adam walked up, still eating his roast potato off his fork and walked
straight up to the chicken pot to help himself. Stuart whistled at him
like he was an Ethiopian kid to get him into the line. Then he told
him that he was pretty uncouth to line up for seconds while he was
still eating his firsts. The way Adam figures it, it isn't uncouth -
it is "strategy". I don't really need to point out that Adam also
thinks drafting and shirking on pulls is a strategy Different shirker
from today though. After Stuart schooled him a bit, I finished and
went to line up. I saw Adam in second place in the line, still eating
his potato. I just stood in front of him and told him that you could
only have clean plates in the seconds line. Somedays, a fool just has
to be taught.

Day Two - Lakeside Field Camp to Lakeside Beach Camp

2010-03-02T09:42:00.001-08:00

Distance: 109.6km
Ride time: 3:50

Best thing: Another day closer to the border of Kenya.
Worst thing: Still plenty more days in Ethiopia.

Best shuffled song: I Made a Friend by The Cruel Sea.

After a bit of a rough night, Stuart, Sunil and I headed off for what
should be a short day. Gizzy was feeling pretty bad and decided to
take it slowly.

We put in a pretty good effort for the first 20 or so minutes. Marcel
still caught us up pretty easily though.

While I was second wheel, we headed through a village. I saw a large
group of people spread across the road and pulled to the inside so
that we could see that we would need space to get through. Riding more
aggressively like this has worked pretty well in previous villages.
Not so much in this one. As we went by, a guy that I thought was
moving out of the way didn't move and I clipped his shoulder.

I went down and one of the other riders came over the top of me to
crash out as well. I only got a few grazes and a slightly banged up
knee. The other rider has a pretty swollen wrist. He rode out the day,
but will still need to have an x-ray when we get to a larger town. I
feel pretty bad that my poor judgement might have screwed up his
chances at EFI and a race win.

While I was riding after the lunch stop, some punk farm kid threw a
rock at me. I have kind of reached the point at which I take that kind
of stuff with good grace. I put my bike down and took off after the
kid. As soon as he and his layabout friends saw me running, they all
start screaming and yelling. I chased the kid back to his little hut.
He hid in the corner and his mother started yelling at me, then the
kid, then hitting the kid, then yelling at me some more.

While that was happening, the dinner truck was coming up behind. They
saw all the kids take off, then my bike on the ground, then me
sprinting after the kid. One of the Indaba guys came up to see what
was wrong. When he got to the hut, the mother straight away stuck out
her hand and asked for money.

I dunno what I was hoping for when I starting chasing the kid, but it
wasn't very satisfying. Other riders have been taking their shoes,
sticks and schoolbooks away from them. They probably won't forget
that, but it seems pretty harsh. Maybe they need a Tyler Durden here
to Raymond K. Hessel them.

Despite all that, the riding here is still good. It is not as
interesting now that we are out of the hills, but it is nice to be
going a consistent speed and watching the kilometres ticking over.

The lakeside beach camp was pretty nice, plenty of grassy areas to
camp. Plus, a bar / restaurant selling cold cokes and spaghetti. And
electricity. And warm showers. Pretty good all around really. Even the
3km of dirt to get down to the lake wasn't too bad - all rideable on
the drops except for a few patches of sand.

One of the things that struck me was the size of the lake. Heaps and
heaps of fresh water.

When I got in, there was a big bunch of Ethiopians coming down to
enjoy the lake. All good, except they didn't take any of their litter
with them and on the way out, one of them grabbed some of the other
riders' gear. Then, later that night, someone came back and grabbed
whatever they could get their hands on out of one of the other tents.
Pretty crummy.

Day One - Addis Ababa to Lakeside Field Camp

2010-03-02T09:40:00.001-08:00

Distance: 97.18km
Ride time: 3:32
Climb: 238m (but descended 700m)

Best thing: Runaway win at Cataan.
Worst thing: Watching some guy clean his kid's arse with a rag then
throw the rag down in a pile behind the fruit stand.

Best shuffled song: No music today.

We started off the day with a 17km convoy through the streets of
Addis. Lots of traffic and lots of diesel exhaust, but a pretty
relaxing convoy.

Convoy ended, Gizzy, Stuart and I headed off at a reasonable clip. It
wasn't long until we had passed most of the field and caught up with
Frans, Tim and Lynn. Frans was enjoying the descending and feeling
strong after getting over the sickness so he was doing a massive pull.
Kind of felt bad bludging off him, but the alternative was dropping
back or attacking around. Neither one felt like the smart move.

After a while, we got back into a normal rolling rhythm. While I was
doing my pull, the runabout came alongside and Sharita, one of the
tour directors, yelled at us to slow down because the lunch truck
wasn't at lunch yet. Soon the truck went by though and we sped back
up.

Out of lunch, Stuart and I realised that Marcel and Frans where still
at lunch and we only had 30km or so to go. We decided to push for it a
bit and do rock-paper-scissors for the stage win if we held Marcel
off.

We pushed a bit, but it wasn't long before I saw Marcel and a bunch of
other riders coming up behind. Stuart and I were at the back and
decided to jump on the back of Marcel's group as he went by. To make
it easier we jumped back on the front of our group and sped back up to
reduce the difference in speed as Marcel went by.

Well, turns out that Marcel wasn't going by, instead he and Jen joined
our group. We did the normal rolling pulls and were getting pretty
close. I rolled off the front out to the back. Unfortunately, I didn't
realise that the last wheel was baked and falling off the back of the
group already, so I had to bridge back from him to the back of the
group, straight after pulling. This isn't an ideal situation towards
the end of the day.

For some reason, a bunch of guys started sprinting at the front, even
though they had gone _past_ the finish trucks. The finish flag wasn't
out yet and they had missed it. That gave me a couple of seconds to
catch back up and turn into the truck. In the end, Stuart took the
stage and I took second.

Cause the stage was short, 90 odd km, and fast, 700m of descent, we
got into camp before noon. Plenty of time to play and win at Settlers
of Cataan. By the end of the game, I was such a resource power house
that I was losing cards to the robber even if I finished my last turn
with nothing. In the end I could have won either by stealing the
longest road or building another settlement.

Day Zero - Rest Day in Addis Ababa

2010-03-02T09:35:00.001-08:00

The rest day was a bit more frantic than I would have liked. The
highpoint was definitely the buffet breakfast at the Sheraton. Pretty
must the same as a hotel in not-Africa, except the bacon was beef
bacon. Kind of wrong. We spent a good three and a half hours sitting
around eating food and drinking juice and macciattos. And using their
shiny, clean facilities.

After that, I tried tracking down my DHL package. I had a lot of
trouble with this at first because all I had was the original Canberra
-> Khartoum tracking number, not the Khartoum -> Addis number. And for
some reason, the package was addressed to the hotel, not to me. So
after a few dud phone calls to DHL from the hotel lobby I gave up and
went back to camp to clean my bike and do my washing.

While I was doing that, Paul, one of the TDA guys, got a hold of the
new tracking number. All I had to do then was jump in a taxi to the
closest DHL office and get them to check which office my package was
at. Turns out it was in the head office of Addis, so back in the taxi
to head out there.

Out there, the lady just opened a cupboard labelled "Africa" and the
_only_ package in there was my one! Next time I will know to just say
"Can you look in the cupboard and see if you have a package in there?"
Instead of frisking around with tracking numbers and what not.

It was kind of cool driving around town in a taxi. To start with, he
charged 50 birr to go from the campground to the closest DHL office.
That only took 5 minutes, so it was a bit of a rip off. Then it was
150 to go to the main DHL office and go back to Friendship City, a
shopping centre we saw. Then it was 250 to go to the main DHL office,
back to Friendship City, wait an hour for us to finish, then go to a
bookstore, then go back to the campground. Much more reasonable.
Though the night before, we paid 250 to go all the way out to the
Korean hospital, wait three hours then come back.

We also saw a bunch of the city. The technique of using wooden
scaffolding isn't limited to rural areas. Even buildings that are ten
or more stories high are built with the wooden scaffold. I dunno if
they do all the concrete skeleton by eye as well, but by the look of
some of the bridges, I'd say that some of it was.

Anyways, I now have some more bibs and chamois cream and Stuart has
his CO2 adapter as well. Happy days. One of the riders, Tony, went
home for a week between Gondor and Addis. He brought a set of Schwalbe
Marathon Durano 25s back for me. They are a crazy thin set of tires.
Compared to normal mountain bike tries, or even the 32s that I've been
running, they look ridiculous.

CPAR Camp to Addis Ababa

2010-02-21T21:43:00.002-08:00

Distance: 104.3km
Ride time: 6:40 (plenty of stops hunting for coffee)
Climb: 1194m

Best thing: Awesome rolling hills through spectacular countryside.
Worst thing: Too tired to gun it.
Best shuffled song: Search & Destroy by Iggy Pop.

For a non-race day, today was a bit of a grind. We had a headwind most of the day which made things a bit miserable. Instead of breezing along at a good pace we had to push. Which was a shame, because I think that without the headwind and a fresh set of legs it would have been a great ride. There were some ripping, twisted descents (which were still fun) with some nice hills out of them.

Today was also the most people that I have seen on the trucks so far. Before breakfast I'd estimate that at least half of the riders were on the trucks. Even more jumped on at lunch, because there was a 300m climb to the start of the convoy into Addis. At the start of the convoy bunch of them jumped right back off for the privilege of rolling down the hill into Addis. One of the truck guys was saying that last year, one couple rode the truck for half of every day, but insisted on riding across each border. Seems strange to me, but I guess people pay a lot of money to do the tour, so should do whatever maximises their enjoyment.

No luck with the coffee for most of the day. Each place that we went to was "Boona? Yellum." If we asked where coffee was, they just pointed up the road to Addis. Once we hooked up with Addis from Addis, a local rider, we managed to grab a cup in a new hotel in one of the towns. The hotelier came over to talk to us which was pretty interesting. From what he said, and one of the other riders related from the Ethio-German Hotel, it sounds like getting construction done here is a real hassle. People work day-to-day, so you can't be sure if they are going to turn up. Kind of like Australian builders, but way worse.

Anyway, the coffee at the hotel wasn't great, but it was sweat to sit in the shade and relax before jumping back on the bike for the last climb to the convoy. The place will be even nicer when the guy gets the pool and tennis courts finished. Maybe TDA will change the route to have a layover there before Addis.

The other thing that happened was that I went to a hospital here in Addis to see if an opthamologist could take a look at my dodgy eye. Turns out no, an opthamologist couldn't look at my eye. They only run the eye clinic two days a week and I can't hang around four days until it opens back up. Doesn't worry me too much though. I think it is a manageable problem. TDA also has a better network in Kenya, so it should be easier to find a clinic with the right gear to take a closer look. The hospital wasn't the crazy bedlam that I imagined it might be. Pretty normal place. Consultation with a GP cost 110 birr, which is 22 cokes or around ten dollars.

The funniest thing at the hospital was one of the other riders. He has lost heaps of weight and is pretty hungry all the time. The cafeteria in the hospital was shut - sick people don't eat on Sundays? - but he convinced a nurse to give him part of her dinner. Fried egg sandwich. I am not ashamed to say that it tasted great.

Sitting behind the waiters' desk in the rest day's restaurant so that I can charge my laptop. Apparently they do a pretty good steak and chips. Six weeks ago, I'd laugh at ordering something like that instead of Lamb Tibs or Doro Wat. These days, my stomach is a delicate instrument and every meal needs careful consideration lest it revolt.

Tomorrow is the rest day. With luck, I will get over to the Sheraton to enjoy their buffet breakfast, do internet on their WIFI and hit the supermarket out there. Then I can spend the afternoon lying on my back in the grass, digesting all the bacon and other goodness.

CPAR Camp to CPAR Camp

2010-02-21T21:43:00.000-08:00

Distance: 87.09km
Ride time: 3:38
Climb: 1084m

Best thing: Letting loose and hurling a rock at some kid.
Worst thing:
Stuart's best shuffled song: Hopeless by Train.

This should have been a pretty easy day: one big climb into and out of lunch, then rolling hills and a big descent to camp.

It did indeed start off pretty easy, but soon things went doolally. My left ankle was a bit bust from the day of climbing before, so I couldn't really push the dog up the big hill. Forced to spin in my granny, I found it pretty lung busting. In a good way though. It is kind of satisfying to be breathing like a asthmatic Alsatian and dripping sweat going up a hill in the sun.

The climb topped out at the highest point of the whole tour: 3100m. I have been higher than that before up in the Rockies, but it is much better to have climbed there yourself - not that long ago we were down at sea level. Even after the 20km long descent to camp, we are still at 2600m.

There are a couple of hotels and bars on the edge of the Blue Nile Gorge. One of them was the Ethio-German Hotel. Had some pretty decent spaghetti there, but no schnitzel and rosti is a crime. It wasn't a patch on the Austrian Tea House up at Wiseman's Ferry. Instead of a guy laughing at me for having schnitzel for desert there was an angry German lady telling me that there was no spaghetti left.

The view from the hotel down into the Gorge was awesome though. There was a Portuguese Bridge built during some Muslim / Christian war a few hundred years ago. It was hard to tell why they bothered - you could walk around the area the bridge covered in a few extra minutes. Looks cool though.

The other thing that happened was that my jar of expensively acquired auction Nutella broke. Sad times. Sad sad times. Plenty of "awes" as I stumbled around camp without the shattered corpse in my hand.

On one of the small post-lunch climbs, some kid took a fake swing at Stuart when he was riding in front of me. Stuart swerved at the kid to discourage him. Then when I went past he went to stick the stick in my rear wheel. I slammed on my brakes and took off after that kid. He was bricking it as soon as he saw me stop so he hard a pretty good head start. Instead of chasing him in my riding shoes, I scooped up a pretty massive rock and hurled it at him. It landed about 5 feet short, which was probably a good thing. If it had hit him, it probably would have flattened him like the little bug he was.

A truck driver saw the incident and stopped to tell the farmer something. Hopefully it was something like "Tell your kid not to mess with those crazy ferengi - they might do anything." He beeped and waved happily as he overtook me, so I guess he wasn't too alarmed by my rock throwing.

Other kid related incidents today (not all me): massive rocks being thrown; video tape strung across the road at neck height; organised ambushes of rock throwing chickens; and random displays of wangs.

The kids throwing rocks is really starting to wear on people. I think that if we were collectively in charge of dispersing aid to countries, Ethiopia would not be getting anything next time around. A lot of kids here seem to be pretty sure that we are going to automatically give them money, pens or shirts. I dunno if that is because of foreign aid or what, but it reflects pretty poorly on Ethiopia. Which is a shame, because most adults are pretty helpful and the Ethiopian riders that are with us are good. Except for the old lady that hit Simon with a handbag.

Dinner was great. It was spiced and barbecued sheep bits. Tasted just like KFC. And on the side was a fantastic pasta salad. Probably only second to the

Tomorrow is non-race day, so hopefully ii will be full of coke and coffee stops and not full of punks with rocks and sticks.

Day Three - Blue Nile Gorge

2010-02-21T21:41:00.000-08:00

Distance: 86.4km
Ride time: 4:40
Climb: 1777m

Best thing: 20km descent to the bottom of the Blue Nile Gorge, listening to Battle without Honour or Humanity (honourable mention to the super-cold shower at camp).
Worst thing: Nothing.
Best shuffled son: Yeah! by Usher

Today was the day that we had all been looking forwards to - the Blue Nile Gorge day.

Everyone seemed pretty slow to get on the bikes in the morning. Most people had been up at 0230 to put the flies on their tents when it started to rain. I normally put my fly on whether it looks like rain or not - the world definitely doesn't need to see me baby wiping myself after a long day on the bike.

I set out solo and was feeling pretty good. Rolling hills with around 100m of climb are actually feeling good to me at the moment. I even managed to keep up some speed on the unpaved sections of road. I stuck to my normal plan of riding however I feel and it paid off with me being the first into lunch - unprecedented. Because today had a time trial section starting from the bottom of the gorge, there needed to be a TDA staffer down there to record people's start times. When I rocked into lunch (literally, the lunch was up a loose, rocky road - I spat rocks out my back wheel), Chris, the mechanic with whom I tried to make an accidental break back in the day, was still lunching it up. I wasn't too worried though cause I knew that I would be a slow descender and catch me up pretty easy before I got to the bottom.

The ride into and out of the gorge was unbelievably epic. A lot of the time not the way down, I couldn't stop thinking "Wow, this is the Blue Nile Gorge, and I am getting to race my bike down it". When I wasn't thinking that, I was either nodding along to Electric Samurai (best riding music) or shitting myself dodging rocks and potholes. After a loooong descent, the actual bridge across the Blue Nile comes into view. Still a few hundred metres above and a couple of kilometres away from the bottom, this is when I first started noticing the road back up the other side of the gorge. Doesn't look so hard I thought.

Once I got to the bottom, Chris was there waiting for me to start the time trial. Just for laughs, we did a push start, so I got a couple of free kilometres per hour right off the bat. That lasted until the first corner.

The ride up actually wasn't too bad. I will never be a fast climber, but I think that I am becoming more consistent. I spent less time feeling like death and more time looking at the view and pedalling away than I did on the big climbing day to Gonder. I still stopped at the coke stop 10km up the hill for a couple of icy cold cokes, and a few times to take pictures. I also stopped at a spring to wet down my head. This was definitely the day that I sweated the most. Kind of gross.

I got passed by a bunch of riders. First Adam on the descent. Then Marcel and Jethro powered past while I was at the spring. Then Tim while I was sitting on the coke stop's stoop ("You, you got what I need", etc). Then Gizzy a few kilometres from the top of the hill. I didn't feel too bad because most of those guys are all strong riders.

On the last set of switchbacks, an Ethiopian guy started chatting to me in English (yeah, I was going that slow). After the preliminaries, he asks me "Are you tired?" "Yes, very very tired" says I. "Oh. What can I do to help you?" "Nothing I am afraid." That guy and his friends were walking to the to of the hill as well, and they just cut straight up the hill instead of going up the switchbacks. They almost beat me to the top. Heh.

Camp is pretty cool. We are on the grounds of some NGO started by the TDA organiser called CPAR. I am camped under a satellite dish for shade and extra radiation. There are also super cold showers. At first I thought that it was way too cold to get into, then I remembered that I had been sweating in the sun for hours. My whole framework for judging showers has changed now. The best shower is the one that you are having right now.

Added bonus - electricity.

Farm Camp to Pine Camp

2010-02-21T21:39:00.001-08:00

Distance: 116.0km
Ride time: 4:52
Climb: 1757m

Best thing: starting to feel strong on the hills after being sick.
Worst thing: even when I am strong, I am still fat.

Even more hills than the day before. The burgers in Gondor are finally starting to release their greasy, uncooked fingers from my guts, so I really enjoyed some of the hills.

As Stuart, GIzzy and I were heading out Chris, the tour mechanic, asked us to wait up for him. Riding in a four is easier than a three, so we were happy to wait. After 30 minutes or so though, Marcel came steaming by and Chris jumped ship to ride with him. We'd picked up Simon though, so we were still a four.

The first major climb of the day, I decided to push a little bit and kept it in the big ring. I pulled away from the rest of the group and managed to stay ahead for most of the ride into lunch. Simon caught me on the very last part of the second climb into lunch, and Stuart and Gizzy were only minutes behind as well. So, pushing it then feeling knackered wasn't a super smart move.

Those guys were a bit wasted after lunch, and Gizzy actually said that she didn't want to ride with me that day. Oh well, it was a pretty nice day to be riding solo on such a nice day.

Lots of hills and a section of unpaved road made me pretty tired. The campsite here is awesome, it is in a pine forest, so plenty of shade soft ground for camping. I'd would have preferred an extra rest day in a place like this than in Gondor.

The more I ride in Ethiopia, the more it looks like the farmland around Yass to me. I'll try get some photos the next time I am bushed and riding super slowly. Maybe I have just forgotten what Yass looks like though.

Nothing much else had happened. One of the riders that was sick in Bahir Dar caught a minivan and caught up with us. Yellow Billed Kites are all over the place here - they are pretty cool to see. The cook threw a fatty piece of gristle into the air and the bird caught it easy as pie. I got hit by my first decent sized rock. I'd stopped to see if a stopped rider was ok and some kid loitering outside a primary school walloped me good. A later rider got hit with a rock on the hard so close and so hard that they need a couple of stitches. Hardcore.

Bahir Dar to Farm Camp

2010-02-21T21:38:00.001-08:00

Distance: 161.39km

Ride time: 6:15

Climb: 1577m

Best thing: kilometres long descent.

Worst thing: eyes stop working.

Another nice day of rolling hills. The climbing was pretty consistent after the 60km mark to around 100, 110. After that, it was all downhill with a few little kickers. Once again, the scenery was spectacular. I'll try add some photos with this post, but internet here is slooow.

Some of the descents were kind of sketchy. Kids, donkeys, dudes with massive bundles of sticks on their backs plus a crosswind make for dicey moments at 65km/h. I chickened out and ended up braking.

I got hit by my first rock. Before now, the kids had aim too poor to hit me. Mine just bounced off my leg, so it was just kind of funny. One other guy just hit right in the chest at 65km/h so he has an awesome welt now. I did have a kid do a flying karate kid kick at me when I was on the drops. That freaked me out.

Rode with Stuart and Gizzy before lunch. After lunch, Stuart's sickness made him drop back and Gizzy was feeling strong, so she shot ahead. Good though, cause Gizzy was repaying her coke debts. So when I made it into camp, I had a nice cold coke waiting. Awesome.

About my eyes. Since I had eye surgery, dirt and smoke can make my left eye pretty blurry. Nothing serious, but it makes finding the finish flag a bit hard.

Everyone is looking forwards to doing the next mandatory day: the descent into then climb out of the Blue Nile Gorge. Should be an interesting day on the bike for me.

Rest Day in Bahir Dar

2010-02-16T07:40:00.000-08:00

First things first, it's pronounced "Bar-dar". Until you learn that, you get a lot of funny looks. Bahir Dar is a decent sized town on a pretty big lake formed by some dam across the Blue Nile. Apparently, the Egyptians aren't super pleased by the dam or something. I guess that they enjoy screwing with the Nile too much to let anyone else have a go.

Out on the lake there are a couple of islands and a peninsula that have some monasteries on them. I was looking forward to seeing these places. Turns out that like a lot of stuff over here, they are pretty touristy. I wouldn't mind it so much, except that there are none of the normal benefits of places being touristy. Stuff is still pretty disorganised - it takes ages to get there, there are no toilets or places to get food. You kind of get the worst of both worlds: touts selling you crap, but no place clean to take a dump.

Having said that, some things about the monasteries where cool. First, they were constructing a new building out there. That was interesting to see because they don't have any real machinery to help out. To make the concrete frame, they have to haul water from the river, smash rock to make aggregate mix, it all by hand, then haul it in little buckets to pour into the wooden forms. To make the re-enforcing, they cut the steel by hand, bend it in a jig, then tie it together. Everything is done by eyeball. So that was cool to see.

Second, I got to try some Ethiopian coffee, brewed in the traditional way. Delicious coffee and they burn aromatic wood on the fire they use to brew the coffee. A real experience. And delicious coffee.

Lastly, you get to pottle around on a little boat. This was fun for 15 minutes. Unfortunately, you spend about 2 hours on the boat. Oh well. Just goes to show that you can have too much of a good thing.

After that, I took the rest of the day pretty easy. Went into town to get some food to make tuna and cheese sandwiches. Because there are so many tourists here, there are always little kids hanging around that will help you out with stuff; like showing where a market is that sells cheese. They carry your bags and stuff like that. Kind of sucks, cause it means that they don't go to school or anything like that.

A bunch of the little kids call me "fat man". I blame this on the other riders. One taxi driver in Gondor called me a fat man, and after that riders seems to delight in letting the kids know that is what I am called. I find it pretty funny when some tiny kid comes up to me and starts ragging on me.

The one that helped me out this afternoon just wanted one of the stupid sparkly hats that some of the riders wore to the fancy dress party the night before.

Oh yeah, the fancy dress party. For some reason, there was a fancy dress party. The theme was Mardi Gras. I had no real idea what a Mardi Gras costume would look like, but I figure that everything in the US has frat boys at it. My awesome frat boy costume was a sleeveless hoodie that I bought from a street stall and a white cowboy hat I borrowed off another rider. Fashionable, and I can wear the hoodie later on as well.

Still being sickly, I called it a night pretty early but some of the other riders pushed the boat out a bit. One guy threw up right outside his tent - on the uphill side. Wretched.

Rest Day in Bahir Dar

2010-02-16T07:31:00.000-08:00

The one that helped me out this afternoon just wanted one of the stupid sparkly hats that some of the riders wore to the fancy dress party the night before.

Still being sickly, I called it a night pretty early but some of the other riders pushed the boat out a bit. One guy threw up right outside his tent - on the uphill side. Wretched.

Gondor to Bahir Dar

2010-02-16T07:23:00.000-08:00

This couldn't have been more different from the seven day slog from Khartoum to Gondor. Two days of pretty cruisy riding. 170km and 1400m of climbing total. The second day was only 61km, so we arrived at the hotel here before 10am.

The best thing about the ride was definitely the climbing. I'm not really made for climbing (I haven't lost that last 25 or so kilos I'd need to be that), but I still like climbs. I am talking about proper climbs though. Climbs need two things to be proper.

1. Something to look at one you get to the top - even better if there is something to look at while you climb.
2. A descent on the otherside.

If an uphill doesn't have those two things, I figure that you might as well go and ride into a headwind or smash yourself in the stomach for half an hour or something.

Anyway, the climbs here have definitely been proper climbs. Each major one has taken me between two valleys, so I get to watch the valley behind disappear and the view along the separating ridge change. On the first day, there were a bunch of rock spires (minarets?) which were especially cool.

The rest of the days are rolling hills. Some of them have been screwing with our heads. Everything feels like you are riding down a hill, except that it is really heavy going. It takes a while to work out that you are actually riding up an incline. Normally, I don't work it out until I turn around at the top and see how far up I have come. You'd think with my ultra-fancy GPS that will show me the current grade and altitude I'd be able to work out if I was going uphill or downhill.

The feel of riding has definitely changed. All through Egypt and most of Sudan, there were basically two groups at the head of the field then a bunch of slower groups and solo riders behind. These days though, the two groups have split up as riders have tired or ailed. A bunch of the previously slower riders have also started to pick up speed as well. I think that part of this is the effect of hills. It seems harder to have a group stick together if they can't all climb hills at about the same speed. As a slow climber (did I mention that I am still a fat man?) I can't stick with any group for very long once the hills ramp up.

This makes it both less and more interesting riding wise. Less interesting, because you don't really have an option about which group to try to stick with. More interesting, because all the decisions about pace are your own, you aren't constrained by the collective pace of the group.

The more riding on the road I do, the more I enjoy it. Seriously considering getting a proper road bike, instead of the steel beast I am riding on here, when I get back home.

That said, I do spend a bit of time thinking about some of the really nice offroad rides I have done - especially the stuff in Wales. For some reason, being on soil so parched it is cracking apart and rock hard and with no shade really makes me appreciate the wet, soft, loamy soil between all those huge trees. Pretty tempted to change my ticket home to a round-the-world ticket and head out to Wales and Scotland for a while. It would be fricking awesome to do some of those parks with strong legs.

The land here is pretty heavily cultivated. All the valley floors are farmed and towns are full of donkeys and sheep / goat things. All I really knew about Ethiopia before I came here was that they didn't have any food when I was in primary school, so I am trying to reconcile those two things. A student of history I am not.

Nothing else much has happened. My biggest extra-curricular activity is trying to replace my headphones. I broke them in Dindir National Park (yeah, that Dindir) when they fell out of my ears (I guess that even my ear muscles were tired) and wrapped around my rear wheel, with predictable results. So far, backwater Ethiopia hasn't been able to replace my iPhone campatible, inline remote, intra-aural headphones. They do have a wide selection of "genuine" Apple headphones. Addis Adaba is meant to be pretty built up, so hopefully I will have more luck there.

Fingers crossed, my DHL package full of bike bibs will also be waiting for me in Addis. My current crop of bibs is starting to look a bit the worse for wear. Even the ones that were brand new before the trip are a bit beat up. A lot of stuff is like that actually. One of the seams on my tent is starting to open up as well. Could be a bit dicey when we get to the rainy part of Africa - wherever that is. Maybe the fly part of the tent is what keeps the inside of the tent dry. Not really up to speed on the whole tenting thing.

Khartoum to Gondar

2010-02-13T04:21:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 2892 + some more where my GPS was flat.

Dindir Day
Pretty extreme. This was definitely the hardest day so far. If I'd written this blog three days ago, that would have been the hardest day. If I'd written this blog two days ago, that would have been the hardest day. If I'd written it one day ago, that day would have been the hardest day. An awesome buildup of unpleasantness.

First day out of Khartoum was a ride in bad paved roads with a lot of traffic. This was a two lane highway. Trucks and buses going in the same direction as us cut it pretty close one at times. Trucks and buses overtaking coming towards it cut it even closer. We had a couple of times where we got forced off the road, down the embankment and into the dust at the side of the road. Stuart had one awesome recovery from a fully sideways bike in the middle of the pack that could have been disastrous.

After a while, our group got a bit more road savvy. When I saw an oncoming overtaking manoeuvre, I'd ride out into the road and start waving at the truck or bus to at least let them know that we were on the road.

The headwind, awful road and tension of looking out for being smashed by a truck got to me after a while. When some teenagers on a street corner started yelling "F*** you, m*******f****r", etc, I lost my temper and dropped the C bomb on them with massive prejudice. That shut them up.

Anyways, after that epic haul, we got to an already forgotten camp site. Oh actually, there was something memorable about it. I was feeling ok when we got in, so I went off riding to see if I could find the Nile. Well, I didn't find the Nile, but I ended up riding through a tiny little village - real authentic looking stuff. I managed to find a little store with a working cooler, so I grabbed a bunch and took them back to camp to share around.

Later on, Stuart and I went back to grab some more stuff. I've got to paint a bit of a picture here so that you understand how ridiculous things got. We were both wearing shorts (almost unheard of in Sudan) had our wide-brimmed hats on underneath our bike helmets and are riding ridiculously expensive push bikes. So not exactly blending in right?

We got back into the village and a relatively fancy looking white car pulls up full of dudes in the traditional white robes. One of the guys asked us if we had a permit to be there: of course we don't. Then he asked if we have a passport: they are back in the trucks with our luggage. Then he tells us that he thinks that we are spies, sent from America to do bad things. I was pretty amused, I dunno if a spy would rock up in such retarded looking clothes. Anyways, after he looked through the photos on my camera and we kept asking him to call the Ministry of Tourism and check with them, his demeanour really changed. He told us that we were free to go and buy our snacks. Pretty awesome all round.

I should say that later on, the same guy apologised to one of the other riders that went into the village. The whole time he was pretty professional and so on as well.

Back to the awfulness.

The next day wasn't actually so bad. We had some more traffic and headwind in the morning and the day dragged on a bit. About 20km from the end, our group picked up a police escort and got lead through the capital of the region that was hosting us.

It was pandemonium.

There were packs of people lining the road on both sides. Screaming and chanting at us. It was pretty awesome for us, we were the second group through that day and it was still pretty early, so all the kids were excited just to see us. Apparently, it was pretty un-awesome for the later groups - particularly the people that like to ride alone despite TDA's direction.

Rider meeting that night was pretty fraught with claims that TDA should be making sure that kids are under control and so on. TIA. A couple of people even accused the faster riders (which I guess includes me in the case) of teaching the kids to high-five. Sometimes, people are just ridiculous when they are upset about stuff.

The third day out of Khartoum was the start of the dirt. After 44km of paved roads, we got to the real stuff. Stuart and I blew straight off the group and went for it. It became obvious pretty soon that Stuart completely dominates me on the dirt. His franken-fork (almost exactly what I was thinking of bringing) seems to really help on the corrugations that are so popular over here.
Anyways, we did 90km of dirt that day and I have to say that some of the little descents and corners reminded me exactly why mountain biking is so awesome. Unfortunately, those bits were surrounded with kilometre after kilometre of headwinds and corrugation action.

Some of the same people that had a hard time the day before got lost on the way to camp and were pretty annoyed by the time that they got in. Bad luck seems to run in batches out here. Some people get no flats, others get multiple each day. Some people are still pretty fit, others are plagued by everything going around.

The best bit about the day was being off the main roads and seeing the farming villages a bit more closely. On the main road, we get a pretty skewed impression of Sudan. Most people outside the big cities are involved with agriculture. It is pretty surreal to be riding down the market street of a little mud brick or thatch village and see people cooking the traditional foods. Or see a guy on a camel herding his goat / sheep. Awesome though.

Day Four was the real killer. This was the day that we were going to head through the park and cash in the extra kilometres we did to get down here so early. It was slated to be 140km of dirt but the tour was still telling us that we would have time to take pictures and so on. I figured that we wouldn't be doing a lot of stopping with 140km to go on the dirt.

Sure enough, after we wasted a few minutes getting our convoy of 8 or so riders together to start the ride and spent 1.5 hours at lunch in a welcome ceremony, us front riders were really getting pushed for time.

Oh yeah - this was all on the worst surface that I have ever ridden on. If it wasn't bone shuddering corrugations it was loose sand over bone shuddering corrugations.

After lunch, my average dropped to 11km/hr or so. The strange thing was, I was still feeling strong in my legs and back, but my body was totally shattered. We all made it to camp before the cut off, as well as Rod, Julianna and Gizzy from the next convoy.

We were all pretty happy to still have EFI.

After 128km of Dindir National Park, all I saw was some warthogs and baboons. Shame about the lions and bucks or whatever. I guess that it is the wrong time of they year.

The Day After the Hard Day
So, some people (me included I guess) thought that the follow up day to the park escapade would be an easy one. Turns out not so much.

The day started pretty hard for me, even before getting on the bike. I felt like I was cooking myself in my tent and thought that my neck was strained. When I got up for the morning routine of digging and hole and looking for Nazi gold, I was so tired that I almost fell asleep while I was squatting. Then when I stood up, I got way dizzy and had kneel back down. After that, it felt like someone had replaced the whole world. Everything felt subtly different. I wouldn't have been surprised if I had fallen asleep for a few minutes and woken up when it was slightly brighter.

It turns out that what I thought was a sore neck was a throat infection, so I am taking some sort of penicillin derivative to get that under control.

All that has encouraged me to drink heaps more water after I get off the bike. Kind of like Randy in Cryptonomicon, but instead of drinking until I sweat, I plan on drinking until I have to go and pee.

Some parts of the pre-lunch part were on an even worse surface than the day before. Totally parched soil that was rock hard and full of wheel grabbing cracks. I managed to flip over my bars and cork my thigh pretty good.

Since the trucks were already full of shattered souls from the previous days, riders on the course that were thumbs down, asking for a lift were given some more water and told to keep on riding.
By lunch time though, I was feeling optimistic. We'd been told that the road cleaned up after the village just after lunch, so I'd be able to make good time and get to camp with plenty of time to do all the maintenance that I skipped the day before.

Well. Turns out that the road didn't clean up. It was patchy, rocky and corrugated all the way to the tar at 108km. I made a record number of coke stops. I had 6 soft drinks on the road. It is more relaxing than you think to sit in a dark, smoky Sudanese drink shop and talk to the locals while chugging whatever strange drinks they sell. The smell of Sudanese cigarettes doesn't even bug me anymore.

After another epic day on the bike, I made it to camp in Gallabat. Gallabat is the border town on the Sudanese-Ethiopia border. Tomorrow we have a non-race day (not sure why). I plan on taking it pretty easy to rest my shattered knees and get the infection in my throat under control.

At the moment, the injuries that I am carrying are starting to worry me a bit. I have two blown knees (be strange to have more than two?), a throat infection, bad arm pump from the corrugations and a corked thigh. Oh, and blisters on the heels of my palms and little toes. With the seven day stint, we are really not getting a chance to recover as much as we do when rest days are four days apart. Also, we normally get the whole afternoon leading into a rest day to mess around, cause we get into camp so quickly. This rest day coming up, that I need so badly, has a mando stage (one that you can't drop the time on) with 2500m on climbing. I doubt that I will be getting to camp any time in the morning, so I lose that rest time. And replace it with climbing.

In one of the rest stops today, one of the locals asked me "why are you doing this?" I had no answer for him.

First Day in Ethiopia

The first day in Ethiopia was also the first day with some real hills. 1000 odd metres over 98km. Not a real climb, but more than we have done so far. Tomorrow is 2500m, so it will be interesting to see how people go.

Today was a non-race day (I guess because of the Ethiopia border crossing) so we all got to take it pretty easy. Plenty of coke stops and rolling along. Even though we were moving along, it was a lot less stressful to not be thinking about how much time you were losing / gaining on the other people.

One more person dropped out of EFI today. I guess that it was the cumulative effect of the last couple of days. Pretty sad way to go out of the club though.

A good dozen or so people have left the tour temporarily and gone ahead to Gondor. A lot of people are pretty bummed out about how hard the tour has been.

In the past, the day before rest day has been auction day. A chance for the Indaba guys to get some beers for picking up after people that are: forgetful if you are feeling generous; or lazy if you aren't. They have had jack of it so much that there was no auction today. From now on, the truck will be swept out each night and people can start taking care of their own stuff. People have been pretty bad about keeping the trucks clean when they are riding them. I am kind of disappointed that riding the truck is so hard that you can't take your trash with you when you are done.

Funniest thing today: the timing system got screwed up and I became section leader somehow. To be rectified very shortly I imagine.

Mountain Camp to Gondor

Writing this checked into the Doha Hotel in Gondar. Pretty nice room as Africa goes. No electricity or hot water at the moment though.

The riding today was pretty interesting. Basically, we had a 13km warm up over some rolling hills, then climbed from 1250m to 2250m over 21km. No downhills in this section. Some bits are still gravel. This was good, because you could look from the bit of the road you were on up the hill way into the distance and see where you are going to end up. Bad because the reason you can see that is all the trucks and buses are kicking up bad to breathe dust.

Anyways, made it to the top without real incident, then dropped 500m over 25km down to lunch. Normal luncheons then rolling hills to Gondor at 109km and 2300m. The finish point is Hotel Goha which is at the top of a hill above the town. Pretty good view to glance at while drinking beer.

Ethiopia is crazily different looking than Sudan. Big, green hills and trees everywhere. They even have plenty of gum trees to make sure that Australians feel right at home. Some of the hills are quite steep sided, like the Blue Mountains or those things down in Mesa Verde. In fact, the whole place reminds me a bit of Mesa Verde. Same kind of hills and low, green vegetation. A lot more fun that to be riding through, instead of driving through it in a crappy mini-SUV.

The kids here are living up to their reputation. I had a couple of rocks and plants thrown at me. One little girl even threw a shoe at me. For some reason, that really annoyed me, so I stopped my bike and threw the shoe over some thorn bushes into a field. I felt a bit bad about it, but I am sure that it can be found.

The other thing kids do is run alongside asking for money. Apparently fat tourists on buses sprinkle money out the windows as they drive along. So now the kids are conditioned to think that we will give them money. Maybe that is why they throw rocks at us: they think if they score a direct hit we will explode in a shower of money and candy, pinata style.

One guy was pretty good. He just casually ran alongside me talking to me in pretty good English.

When I finished for the day I found out that the dinner truck had had a brake malfunction on one of the big descents. The guys are good drivers, so they managed to engine brake that beast to a stop. Bad news was that the dinner truck basically has no engine now.

Broken truck meant that our luggage had to be hauled up on a rented flat bed truck. Which meant that we had heaps of time to kill before we could shower and get changed. Most of us spent it sitting on the back patio looking down into the town and drinking beers.

Rest Day in Gondor

So. The broken down truck means that we are taking two whole rest days here in Gondor. Makes it a lot more relaxed. On a normal rest day, it is a bit of a scramble to get everything fixed and cleaned for riding the next day. Today, I don't really feel like I have to do much of anything. I did clean all the baked on powered off my bike that. That stuff dries like glue with sand stuck in it.

After seven days of riding, with some brutal days in the middle, I am definitely enjoying sitting down doing nothing. The long section has really taken a toll on people. We've had 3 concussions, a broken bone, plenty of saddle sores, the throat infection that is going around and heaps of other niggles. This was the longest stretch between rest days though, so hopefully our bodies will settle down a little and get back into a maintainable rhythm.

To make up for the extra rest day here, the plan is that our route from Addis to Nairobi will be shorter, so we will still get to there on time. Knowing the fun that the TDA likes to have, maybe they will just make us ride a little extra each day. That would be funny.

TDA organiser humour is a little bit of karmic evening up for me. Normally I am the one that gets to tell people that there are no more hills, or the road gets less bumpy, or it is only 1km to lunch. Now the shoe is firmly on the other foot and it is kicking me in the arse for sure. Luckily for me, I am wise to how this works, so I never quite believe anything in the rider briefings.

Ethiopian food back in Australia seems to be pretty authentic. It all tastes the same as it does over here. The only difference is that back in Australia the meat is 1000000 times better. Here it is a minefield of gristle and bone. It is Easter fasting time here though, so there is plenty of pretty good vegetarian food around. I had some Lamb Tibs and Fasting Ethiopian Meal for lunch. It was a pretty massive meal, but I felt so happy afterwards.

Rest Night in Gondor - In which I get attacked by Burgers.

I had a lot less luck with the food at a brewery we went to. The visit had been arranged by our local fixer, Windy, and the big draw was that we would get free beer. The brewery also did chips and burgers. Being pretty hungry still, we all had a couple of burgers and heaps of fries. I noticed that my burger was a bit pink but didn't think much about it.

As the night went on, I felt more and more bloated. By the time we left, my stomach was fricking huge. I should have recognised this as a pretty bad sign, but thought that I had just overeaten and needed to lie down.

By the time we got back to the hotel, I was definitely not feeling well. Those burgers smashed their way our of me like something out of Aliens. Food poisoning in the middle of Ethiopia with days more riding to do is not a pleasant prospect.

The good news is that my throat infection is almost gone, and all the blisters and other niggles have cleared up pretty well. We have only 2 days or riding to the next rest day, then another 5 days to the end of the section in Addis. It's not that I am counting down the days, I am just mindful of what demands I have to make on my body. The Bahir Dir to Addis section includes a mandatory day, which is the climb up out of the Blue Nile Gorge.

Dongola to Khartoum

2010-02-03T22:55:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 2038.4

This was a four day desert stage taking us from Dongola down to Khartoum. Although we covered a lot of distance in this four days, it was pretty cruisy on the bike. I am definitely in some sort of honeymoon period where I am still getting fitter but not getting run down yet.

After Dongola, the race rules changed. Instead of everyone starting at a set time of 8am, racers can set off whenever they like - just scan out at the beginning and the end. This is kind of good, because it stops some of the racers that were grabbing a few sneaky minutes each morning. It also makes the race more interesting, because when you start makes a difference.

I have been starting with Rod, Julianna, Stuart and Gizzy. We normally ride at around the same pace without too many dramas. The faster group of Adrian, Marcel and Franz normally starts behind us and are the last to leave. The slower guys start in front. As the fast guys roll through, slower riders glom on for a few kilometres. Sometimes those of us in the second group jump on as well.

On the first day out of Dongola, we had jumped into that group and it was massive. Everyone was pretty perky out of a rest day, and some people did some pretty quick pulls. I was out the front straight after lunch and I normally find this a bit hard - we really eat fast then get on our way. So I put my head down and pulled for 5 minutes then did a head check to see whether I should drop back to the right or left and let the next rider take over. Well. When I did the head check, I had to do a double take, because no-one was behind me. I had slightly overcooked it, and people had been disorganised trying to get their crap together after lunch.

So, I was out in front, but was by myself and had no-one to share the load with. I also knew that Adrian, Marcel and Franz could chase me down pretty easily. Chris (the TDA mechanic) was on his day off and was riding with us, and he came steaming up with Gizzy. Our plan was to take high-intensity, 30 second pulls.

Our plan didn't quite work. Gizzy dropped off after a couple of minutes. Chris and I lasted out a bit longer, but we both felt pretty beat when the fast core of the group rolled us over. I managed to jump on as they went by, but I was so tired I couldn't stay on and fell off the back. Luckily, there were a few other stragglers behind the core group. In the distance, we could see that Rod, Julianna and Stuart had also fallen off the fastest group. We managed to put in some hard pulls and caught up with them.

It was probably the most interesting hour of riding that I have done, and it was all because I didn't check behind me when I was pulling. Definitely something to remember next time.

I also did my first ever time trial. The first 20km of the last stage of the section was an optional, individual effort. This is pretty different from most road riding where we have been working in groups. I didn't really warm up enough before the time trial and only really started to fire up in the last 5km or so. I felt good enough that I pushed through the next 45km to lunch solo as well though. All those days of being dropped off the fastest group into no-man's land must have paid off.

Despite TDA's reminders, a lot of groups are still spread all over the road. One group yesterday was particularly good. They'd stopped over both lanes and shoulders to take photos of camels (they mustn't know that they are vermin in proper countries). I went through their group so fast that I nearly took one of their arms off as they reached out to take a photo. Could have been a disaster, but instead it was just funny.

Talking about individual efforts, English Eric is still riding most stages solo and pulling off good times. It really takes a toll on him in the heat though. Training-for-RAAM Eric is on the left, individual effort Eric is on the right. To be accurate though, T-f-R Eric also rode the whole stage solo.

One of the pictures in the TDA blog makes it look like I am not enjoying the riding, but just look at how happy and comfortable I look here.
I am probably listening to something like "Nice Weather for Ducks" here. Random shuffle on a full iPod makes for some strange music. Also, when my jersey keeps edging up the volume, I sometimes start riding faster and faster.

The desert road leading me to the next camp. After 140, 150, 160km of this a day, it just looks normal, but it is completely unlike anything I've ridden before. You can see the shifter for the front derailleur here. I haven't used it in anger yet this trip - I hope it still works when we get to Ethiopia next week.

You guys may not believe it, but someone here brought a travel version of Settlers of Cataan along. Crazily, the American rules are different from the proper rules. I managed to pull a win out of the bag with the longest road and largest army. To be fair, me and another player were so intertwined that it only made sense for us to rob the other guy, so he got a bit dog piled. That's Cataan though.

On the day before the rest day, the Indaba guys (the company that runs the trucks for us) have an auction. Everything that has been found around the trucks or camp is sold for beers (or cokes here in Sudan). The stuff for auction is pretty varied. This time around, two of my favourite foods were up for grabs: Crunch Peanut Butter Clif Bars, and Nutella. I lot out on the Clif Bars to Alison, one of the TDA staff, but got the Nutella for the sweet price of 25 cokes.

Later on, Alison slipped me a Clif Bar, so at some future, low point I can have a Clif Bar coated in Nutella.

Turns out that Nutella costs 25 Sudanese pounds at the Afra Mall here, and 25 cokes cost me around 24 pounds, so I got the Nutella for an ok price.

Life on Rest Days

2010-01-30T04:51:00.000-08:00

Rest days have been pretty good so far. Normally the day before a rest day is a shorter day, so I get to the camp and set up before noon. Then there is a whole extra day where we don't have much to do except clean our bikes, tents, clothes and selves.

As I said (wrote) in an earlier post, we are resting up today in Dongola. I've spent most of my time finding and eating food. Breakfast was the last of our stash of Nutella and Nusa with some awesome bread that we found last night. Lunch was a couple of beef and vegetable rolls from a street stall, a whole watermelon, three mangoes and five bananas. Good stuff.

Yesterday's lunch was half a charcoal chicken, some pickled cucumber, normal cucumber and onion on a bed of rice. With bread.

Then dinner was a big banquet of meats, beans, bread and salad. One of the younger, slower guys was eating with the group and was loving cramming his hand into the food to load up his bread. Then explaining how he had had a bad stomach the last few days. Kids today. I wish they would just get off my lawn already and stop with all their street jive.

I spend the time between eating, which their isn't a lot of, reading, sitting around and looking for more snacks. For the last few days, I've been pretty hungry after getting off the bike and no amount of soup has been able to sate me. I found something that I hope will fill the gaps.

All in all, rest days are definitely something to look forward to.

Plans for riding into Khartoum are shaping up to be pretty hard going. We have 500 odd km to cover in 4 days. And one day will be short because we ride into the city under escort for part of the day. Could be another brutal stretch.

Wadi Halfa to Dongola

2010-01-29T23:30:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 1507.5

After getting through Sudanese immigration, we were ready to start riding. In earlier years, this part of the route was the first really rough section - bad, dirt roads full of corrugations and bumps. This year it has all been paved (though one rider managed to leave the road and fly down some embankments) - so the route has through Northern Sudan has been changed. The idea is to spend less time on the busy paved roads and detour through Dinder National Park. This is meant to be a pretty good game reserve. And we will get guarded by guys on camels with AKs.

Anyways, this means that we did our first medium sized back to back days. Two ~150km days in a row. I found the riding pretty easy going, but I am still having to tweak my setup every day to ease up my lower back.

The landscape up here is pretty surreal. Really barren desert with melted looking rock hills. Around the Nile there is a narrow fertile section where most of the houses and fields are. Every now and again, there is a comparatively massive mesa, which you can see from kilometres away.

Seeing the bigger mesas, and watching them come closer then swing by reminds me what I like most about longer distance riding. The magic feeling of pulling the landmarks towards you, just by spinning your legs, is very satisfying. Out here, where the landscape is so flat, except for those mesas, the feeling is magnified ten fold.

I am getting more of feel for riding in a pack. On the shorter day into Dongola (109km), Rod, Julianna, Stuart and I worked pretty well together. Riding in the larger bunch in the morning highlights the difference.

In the morning, the fastest group hasn't split off yet and there are a lot of people out looking to see how long they can stick with the faster riders, so the group is massive. This makes for some interesting maneouvres as people try to get into a groove while other people are weaving in and out. The funniest thing is, the first hour, the fast guys normally seem to take it pretty easy. It isn't until a bit after that when one of the faster guys (or an experimenting slow guy) will start to push the pace ups. In dribs and drabs, the slower guys will get ejected from the fast group and litter the road in panting, heaving blobs.

Yesterday, the fast guys pushed the pace up to around 48km and the large group started to fragment. I managed to get around some of the people dropping off, felt pretty strong and had a clear view of the fast guys. One of the other fast guys was near me as well and I guess is always looking for a challenge, since he is training for the Race Across America. He was keen for us to chase down the fast guys, so he lead out our attempt to bridge to Franz's wheel. He got me to within about 50m of Franz, then peeled off, so I had to get down into the aero position and try power the rest of the way. Well. 10m to go: every muscle in my body limp, breathing like a broken down steam train. Stood up to get a little bit of extra power: even my hip abductors were weak, rubbery. I had nothing more to give.

In the end, I conked out within metres of the easy breathing spot in the back of the fast guys. Pretty exciting though as the pack splits and you power around trying to get back on.

Now, the #2 woman behind Julianna is Gissi, who had been dropped a little earlier than us. Gissi had ridden straight through lunch though, so there was a pretty good chance that she would be able to jump on to the back of the fast guys as they left lunch and steamed through. This meant that Rod and Julianna wanted to minimise how much time Gissi pulled back. Straight out of lunch, Stuart thought he had a mechanical, so he pulled over and I turned around to go back. Rod and Julianna kept going, so once again I was trying to bridge. This time, I managed a pretty sustained effort at 40+ to hook back up. We made it though, and managed to pull our weight for the afternoon.

I hope everyone else finds the minutae of the day-to-day toings and froings on the bikes interesting. Sudan is so laid back, that the only other really noteworthy stuff is what kind of "facilitados" there are at each camp site. That does remind me, in Dongola we are camping at the old zoo. It is actually a really nice park with neat lawns and some good shade trees. The showering facilities are just a hose, but it was really relaxing to stand in my swimmers on the lawn and soap up then hose down. Kind of like the old downstairs shower at the coast. Very nice after a few days of baby wipes in a stinking hot tent after getting off the bike.

Oh yeah. Stinking hot times reminds me of something that happened on the last 150km day. Eric on his Bike (there are three Erics all up) rode straight through lunch then did a massive solo effort trying to stay in front of six of us for the next 70kms. It was getting pretty hot by then (this being the Sudanese desert) and riding solo with no breaks would be pretty hard (I found that out the day before). He managed to stay in front until about 8km from camp. This would have been a really, really hard thing to do. Pretty gutsy stuff. The downside was that he overcooked himself pretty badly and wound up under the truck with a bad heat attack. The first thing that we knew about it was a massive "HEE-UURGH" from under the truck as his post-ride soup bounced. He powered back again the next day to come in not far behind the four of us though.

The only other drama has been one of the slower packs managed to axe themselves. It sounds like one rider was riding on their sticky out time trial bars then managed to touch wheels with the rider in front. Then they breaked (broke?) hard and took down a bunch of other riders. I guess that is part of the problem with riding in a bigger pack of inexperienced riders.

I am getting to be a dab hand at setting up and breaking down my camp each day.

No pictures, because you need a photography permit in Sudan and I haven't got one yet.

Aswan to Wadi Halfa Ferry

2010-01-29T07:15:00.002-08:00

So. In Egypt they have this thing called the Aswan Dam. It was pretty neat to ride across both dams, but that isn't the main reason that it exists. The main reason is so that they have a lake big enough to run the worst ferry service in the world.

It really does pull no punches. The cafeteria is infested with cockroaches. A pile of cigarette butts in the corner that the door opens across - if you can't see it when the door is open, it mustn't exist I guess. People spitting on the floor in the corridor. Bugs living under the mattresses. Stuff getting pilfered off the bikes on the deck. By the end of the journey one of the squatters blocked up (probably because some people on the tour still haven't worked out that you bin, not flush toilet paper here) and overflowed.

I felt pretty run down after spending most of two days and a night on the ferry.

Luckily, we found some pretty good food in Wadi Halfa, including some awesome spicy / curried potatoes, so that recharged my batteries for the 150, 150, and 109km days. So far, Sudan is a lot more laid back than Egypt. Everyone seems to be appreciating the lack of touts and other tomfoolery that got foisted on us in Egypt.

Day Something - Luxor to Edfu to Aswan

2010-01-24T05:29:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 1090

Just finished the two day ride from Luxor to Aswan. Two pretty easy days.

On day one, the fast guys were taking it easy and riding with Rod and Julianna's group. We didn't seem to be pushing too hard though. When it got to be my turn to pull, I decided to conduct a highly scientific experiment to answer two questions:

has my changed bike set up let me ride any more consistently?
what happens when I take the group speed from <35km/h >40km/h?

Does the changed bike setup let me ride constantly with no need to stand?

I feel pretty confident about my answer to this: kind of. I can definitely ride longer, but I do still get a fair bit of lower back pain when I am in the middle of the group. When I am pulling, I have no pain at all. When I am in the back, I can stand up and weave around to let the pressure off. In the middle, I can't stand and I get pain. I think that maybe this is because I don't change my gears as the group speed changes.

This is a pretty easy thing to fix if I remember to think about it.

Having my seat 2.5cm lower and further forward definitely lets me cruise at a higher speed without having to strain much. It is like a free 2 or 3 km/h.

What happens when someone takes the group speed up?

Very easy to answer. What happens is that all the fast guys also speed up. They will also start to ride past someone at the front that is going too slow and take another turn. This is kind of cool, but means that if you come off the front expecting the pace to ease up, you will be pretty surprised.

Yesterday, I was in the back position with Stuart immediately in front of me. He slowed for a few seconds to roll his shoulders and when he looked up, a 10m gap had opened up between him and the next person. We both tried to bridge back to the main group, but neither of us had enough beans to make it.

We caught the bunch again at lunch and tried to hang on again. I only lasted two more pulls before I blew up and evicted myself from the group. After a few kilometres of solo riding, I found Stuart again and we rode it out.

All in all, one very informative day.

Day two was much of the same. Riding alongside the Nile, going through little villages. Kind of thing that is par for the course. When you are riding next to the Nile. Nice as it is, I think it is good that we went East to the Red Sea then over the mountains to get to Luxor. It would have been pretty monotonous following the Nile the whole way.

In Aswan today. Our bunch got an awesome escort in. Two motorcycle police keeping a lane on the Corniche clear for us and stopping traffic at intersections. We might have almost looked like we knew what we were doing to an untrained eye.

We ride over the dams tomorrow to catch our ferry to Wadi Halfa. A group of us have stocked up on our ferry food. Our prize possession is the massive jar of Nutella we found. All that we know about the ferry is rumour. Bed bugs? Power points? Decks full of goats and chickens? We have no real idea. The TDA guys like to keep things a bit interesting.

I am sure that there will be at least one goat. In my mind, it will be like getting on a domestic flight in the USA where people are stuffing all their junk into the overhead lockers then complaining that their lampshade / hat box / baby carrier won't fit.

Oh yeah. I have found the best McDonalds anywhere. The McDonalds here is on the Corniche el Nile. It overlooks the river, so you can watch the Feluccas go by as you eat your two meals. And an Oreo McFlurry. And a chocolate sundae. And another coke. Plus, it has the best toilet in all of Egypt.

This is the packaging left after six people finished eating. We were like some sort of primal embodiment of gluttony.

Plans

2010-01-22T10:32:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: Same as before, but with a short ride in Luxor during which mild adventure took place.

The rider board has been posted with set of stages that will take us to the next rest day.

We don't really know how hard or easy these days are going to be. Rider speculation is that days that we do a reasonable distance (100km+) mean that the conditions are going to be easy. So, fingers crossed, I should have a pretty cruisy run into Dongola. We'll see what Sudan has to say about that.

The two short days are for getting on and off the ferry. These days are a bit risky EFI-wise, because if you get a flat or other mechanical in the convoy, you run a real risk of going on the truck so that the convoy can keep on moving.

That would not suck.

Day Six - Desert Camp to Luxor

2010-01-21T06:21:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 867.7

Today was by far the best day of riding so far. Straight off the bat we dropped straight down, 30km clean to Qena on the Nile. I had had a cold all night and eating hurt my chest, so I was a bit worried, but as soon as I got on the bike, I felt really strong, so I could pull pretty hard to the river.

A day like this really makes road cycling make sense. With just two or three people in the group, it is quiet, and the perfect conditions mean that we can steam along. So satisfying. I'm not sure that is is quite as satisfying as getting a technical section right on the mountain bike.

Other people weren't feeling as strong after yesterday. People had jumped on the dinner truck straight away. This was by far the fullest that I've seen the bike rack in the morning.

I thought that these guys missed out on an awesome ride. Apparently though, the guys at the back caught a bit of grief. One rider got hit by a tomato and rock. Another one got mobbed by kids.

Once we got onto the Nile, the scenery really changed. It was so green and cultivated it kind of reminded me of Queensland. That they were harvesting sugar cane probably added to that a bit. We had a couple of sketchy, out-of-the-saddle pushes to overtake tractors pulling huge loads of cane.

Even the people seemed heaps happier to see us. All the little kids and people shout out "Heeeellloooo, how are you?" and look pretty stoked when we wave back. I kind of wonder if the protracted way it is said is because they only ever hear cyclists yelling it out as they go by, and they think the Doppler effect is part of how it is said.

Now that we have advanced a level, the police have changed uniforms. There are now guys in traditional looking robes (which could be the latest Spring fashion for all I know of Egyptology) with shotguns. These guys are on every bridge heading to the West side of the Nile. I have no idea what is on the West side that is so valuable, or on the East side that is so dangerous. I am a stranger in a strange land. In the way of video games, there are still the normal police at their checkpoints and in their utes as well.

These little critters at lunch we also pretty happy to see us. Two of them ran behind our lunch truck, but as soon as they saw my vagrant beard, they turned and booked it for the hills. Lunch was right by this building. It is a topic of contention whether buildings here are left unfinished because uncompleted structures are taxed differently or what.

Lunch has been something to look forward to every day so far. We basically eat pita bread with some vegetables, a meat like tuna or baloney or leftover dinner from the night before. Even on a fast day where "lunch" is at 0830, I normally cram down a couple. I kind of feel like I could eat a pita sandwich full of just margarine and be pretty happy. Yesterday, I even ate some meatless sandwich meat and found it pretty tasty.

My hobo beard has reached a new level. It stops looking like a beard and is now a fringe of sorts, jutting away from my chin like the edge of a crab.

All good things must come to an end though. So, while we have two days rest here in Luxor, I headed into town to find a barber. The biggest difference between an Egyptian barber and the barber in Yass is that there isn't cricket on the TV here. Apart from that it is pretty similar. My do was so good, another guy went to the same place. I told the guy that I wanted bak-sheesh for my finder's fee. He found that funny enough to give me 25 piastres.

The end result.

Oh yeah. The other difference is that in Egypt, they roll cotton over your face to get all the small hairs off. So now I have Egyptian style plucked eyebrows. I am a stylish looking guy.

They watch you while you... everything.

2010-01-20T06:19:00.000-08:00

So, the police here in Egypt are pretty different to in Australia.

Firstly, you see them everywhere. In Giza, they had a couple of covered pickup trucks at most intersections. Out here in the desert, they have police checkpoints every 50km or so. Sometimes they are stopping cars, sometimes the cars breeze straight through. But they are alway official looking structures with guard towers and a compound.

Secondly, they all have guns.

These guys are really concerned about us. Tourism is a big industry over here, and a bunch of layabouts with nothing to do except eat food and drink questionable Egyptian beer most be a real boon.

The upshot of this is that we have been seeing a lot of the police. Even before the tour started, the groups of us that went out riding in the morning would pick up a police escort. They'd block a lane of traffic so no-one hit us. On the first real day, we had that huge convoy that shut a lane of traffic and all the highway entrances and exits. This has all made our trip way easier so far, and it is always reassuring to see them go by on the road and wait for us to give them a thumbs up.

Even through a tiny town today, riding alone, I got escorted by police car until I went out through another huge checkpoint. A tiny part of me thinks that it is a bit like being run out of town - John Rambo style. Mostly though, they are really friendly guys, so it isn't a big deal.

Camp tonight is by a police / army checkpoint on the road through the Red Sea Mountains (I guess) from Safagha to Qena. There is the normal road blocks and cool steel rope that they can raise across the road to stop traffic. The normal guard towers and guys with rifles.

While I was out digging a hole, two of the border sentries stopped me from going to far from camp - pointing at their guns then out in the distance. I guess that they meant that other guys with guns might be out that way as well. Vague as this is, it is a bit unsettling.

So yeah, pretty different to Australia.

Day Five - Safagha to Desert Camp

2010-01-20T05:58:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 776.1

Link for the ride: http://connect.garmin.com/activity/22852957

Today was the first day with any real hills. We set off from Safagha straight up in the the Red Sea Mountains, heading towards our desert camp. The first 65km to lunch was a constant 1% or 2% grade. Nothing too punishing, but having unrelenting nonetheless. Of course, there was a headwind. It is pretty hard to describe what is like to ascend for 65km to the top of a plateau, then the stark, exposed moonscape at the top. Probably best to think of it as the moon, by brown and super windy.

The scenery was pretty awesome to start with. At first, it kind of felt a little like little Moab to me. Then I couldn't decide if it was more like Fallout 3 or Red Faction: Guerilla. Obviously, I have had a broad education.

I stuck with Rod and Julianna's group for the first 30km, but my lower back is giving me some problems. The best way to relieve that for me is to stand on my pedals for a couple of strokes. Problem with that in a group is that it disrupts the rhythm of the riders behind me and I can't pass on hand signals from the front. So, the only time that I can indulge myself is after I have taken a pull and am rolling along in the back.

Their group ended up stopping on the road ahead just after I did, so I rode in front of those guys for a while.

People here need to pray a fair few times a day, so on highways, they have these handy things.

A few kms up the road, I found the Egyptian riders with a snapped chain. These guys are not really into carrying a lot of tools, spares or knick knacks, so the guy was fixing it by hammering on his chain with a rock. While he was using my chain breaker, R + J's group cruised on by.

I ended up spending most of the day riding solo, fighting the constant headwind. The wind was bad enough to make the descent from lunch to camp seem like a constant climb. I thought that my GPS was broken when it was telling me I was really going downhill.

I think that everyone found today a bit hard - definitely the most riders I have seen turn up on the truck at the end of the day. Some riders have been really unlucky with early injuries and poorly fitting bikes. I was pretty lucky that Shane and the other guys at Bike Culture did such a good job of getting me sorted, even with the last minute bike change. Today, one of the other riders saw the contents of my repairs bag and was gobsmacked. Some other riders seem a bit underprepared - one rider didn't bring a bike computer.

This is my trusty steed. So far, it has been an awesome ride.

I don't think that I have lost any weight yet. Hopefully, that will happen before I get to the real hills in Ethiopia. I haven't had to really use my tiny granny ring just yet though, so I still have that in the bag.

A switched on Egyptian turned up at camp with a cooler full of beer to sell and made a killing. I can't drink knowing that I have another day to Luxor, then another two the Aswan crossing.

Day Four - Desert Camp to Safaga

2010-01-19T03:57:00.000-08:00

Kilometers riden: 613

Another pretty cruisy day. I hooked up with a really consistent rider called Eric to try and smooth out my day. Yesterday and the day before I had been pushing a bit too much in the morning and suffering a bit in the afternoon.

We managed to hold it together for the pretty short day. An already short, 102km day got shortened by the shifted campsite the night before, then the road towards Hurghada was too wet for us to ride, so we took the road straight to Safagha and dropped a couple of extra kilometres.

Eric and I got into a pretty good rhythm where he would pull on the downhills and the flats and I would pull us up the hills. It made things a lot easier. I accidentally dropped him on one hill and managed to take a self-portrait while he caught up:

Got into camp before noon. Pretty different. We went from this:

To this:

Went for an authentic burger, fish and chips for lunch (TDA truck lunch was at 9am or something on such a fast day), and am going to spend the afternoon drinking beer and relaxing on the beach.

Tomorrow is meant to be a pretty hard day: 139km and the first real hills of the tour.

Day Three - Desert Camp to Desert Camp

2010-01-18T03:44:00.000-08:00

Kilometers riden: 530

I got up at around midnight to employ the cat method and found that the headwind had blown itself out during the thunderstorm and a pretty fair tailwind had sprung up.

This made the ride today much, much easier. I spent the morning riding in a group with Jen, Jason and Jim but after lunch I saw a couple of riders in the distance and decided to stretch my legs a bit. I managed to catch a few riders and felt pretty good doing it.

But. Everytime the road swung straight south, I caught a crosswind. By myself, I got knocked around a fair bit. Seeing the road in the distance turn south east was awesome though.

We had a couple of unexpected events today. First we all got held up at a police checkpoint in the morning. Roads here aren't designed for rain, and the police were not sure whether our escort would be able to follow us if the roads were too bad. I guess that they sent someone ahead to find out, because eventually we were allowed to go on. We weren't allowed to take any photos of the checkpoint, so you will have to settle for the first piece in a series I like to call: bearded self-portraits.

The second hiccup was that the police decided that our normal campsite was a bit to prone to flooding, so we rode another 12km (6km according to the TDA folk) up the hill to a new campsite.

All in all, an awesome day. With the tailwind, it really felt like I was speeding through the desert.

Day Two - Desert Camp to Desert Camp

2010-01-17T03:32:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 383.3

This is the board we get each night at the rider meeting. Today was an easy day. We had a monster tailwind and smashed out the 160-odd k's with plenty of time to relax at camp.

Just kidding.

Completely contrary to expectations, we caught a huge, unrelenting headwind straight after lunch and spent the whole afternoon grovelling into it. This was definitely a hard day. By about 30km out we were suffering. The Egyptian riders that led out hard in the morning felt it even more. They stopped to fix a flat - a couple of kilometres later I saw them breeze past in the back of a ute. They caught a lift all the way to the water stop just before camp. They had worked pretty hard towing us in the morning though.

Jen, Jason and I tried to work together to spare ourselves from the wind a bit, but no configuration that we tried really helped.

The final hill of the day turned straight into the wind for a massive grind up the hill. So good to finally get into camp.

By far the hardest day I have ever done on a bike. Including coast trips that have gone all wrong.

Just to top off the night, there was a massive thunderstorm that night that made dinner a pretty wet affair.

Oh yeah. They have this thing here called the Red Sea.

Day One - Cairo to Desert Camp

2010-01-16T03:09:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 215.3

Day One was a pretty interesting ride. We started with a pretty (well, very) slow convoy out to the pyramids. We sat around there and applauded ourselves for a while until we felt sufficiently good about ourselves. I managed to find a cup of coffee and keep up a veneer of civility.

The Australians ready to rock and or roll. I mostly did the rolling around, trying to remember how the whole bicycle thing worked.

Back row, right to left: Stuart, Me, Rod, Adrian, Patrick.

Front row, right to left: Julianna, Annalise, Wayne.

The convoy from the Pyramids out of town was crazy hectic. About 10 police cars and motorcycles. They blocked each exit and entrance to the highway for us, so there was a lot of upset Cairenes wondering why they couldn't get to work that morning. Some local riders joined in and gave everyone the heeby jeebies - cutting in front of people starting a 11k bike ride isn't as awesome as they thought it was. One person flatted twice and lost their EFI status on the first day.

After 32km of pandemonium and Eventually we got to the real start of the day's riding and were free to get on with it.

The landscape was pretty desolate the whole way. I stuck with the second or third group for most of the time until I started to cramp after around 120km. I guess that the whole not drinking will do that to you. Luckily it was only one more hill until camp so I didn't suffer alone too much.

Riding in a group is pretty novel for me. Doing mountain biking, you are normally riding alone, and even if you are in a tight group, there doesn't seem to be much communication. On the road, nearly everything warrants a hand signal, which is pretty lucky, cause a pothole can really ruin your whole day. Despite that, it is pretty peaceful. I'd say it was more relaxing that riding alone - the noises of other people's bikes seems to be quite calming.

Camping was out near a rest area just off the highway. Pretty unremarkable all around. Managed to get my tent up without any angernons.

Photos of Egypt

2010-01-13T21:25:00.000-08:00

Kilometres riden: 82.2 (almost there)

The tour starts for reals in a couple of days. So far my bike hasn't exploded, no-one has got all dramatical or anything.

Believe it or not, the bottom part of this building is a mausoleum. The top is a shanty type deal. It is in the Northern Cemetery. A bunch of the mausoleums there have new tenants, there are the normal streets shops and everything. These people are super, super poor. This was an eerie place to be.

Because books and whatnot are totally boring to read, we weren't 100% sure that this really was a cemetery / housing estate amalgamation. Luckily I could use my super-power of reading Arabic numbers to see all the dates on the plaques. We turned around and left after coming across the first funeral-in-progress. Some things are a little too strange, even for bumbling goofs.
This in the Khan el Khalili. Parts of it had a reputation for being very touristy, but I only saw one other tourist in the couple of hours we were there. If it is all a show for our benefit, it is really elaborate and well orchestrated.

It is pretty funny to imagine that as soon as we walk around the corner, all these people stop hauling bricks up with ropes, haggling over fresh produce, and almost running people over with scooters. Then they flip out their newspapers and slump in a chair until the next tourist wanders by.

I ate a date pastry thing here.

The view from the internet cafe on the very first day. After getting in at 4am and braving the Sudanese Consulate, it was pretty nice to sit by this sunny window and relax.

Best Pizza Hut restaurant location so far. Service was pretty good as well. If you squint, you can make out the Sphinx. You can't see the army of touts selling totally authentic gear though.

Additional

2010-01-12T06:12:00.001-08:00

My tout name is "Indiana Jones" or "Cowboy" because I have a hat. That is just how they roll.

Riding and Pyramids

2010-01-12T06:01:00.000-08:00

Kilometers riden: 57.2

Boom. I have busted my riding in Egypt cherry. A bunch of powered down past Memphis and back to blow the cobwebs away. On the way, I was thinking how nice it would be turn around and get the wind at our backs. Well. Turns out that the wind was on our backs on the way down there. The other guys had actually riden on the road before, so we rolled around taking turns at the front and cranked out the return pretty fast.

After I took my turn pushing at the front, I pulled to the side and rolled to the back. The police following us in their car (oh yeah, I forgot to mention that) thought that made me pretty soft and pointed a few times for me to get back out the front. Luckily, years of sucking at riding has made me pretty good at miming being really tired and, well, bad at riding.

I saw all sorts of stuff riding. Mostly, it is strange riding past donkeys. Not something that you do every day back in Australia.

After sucking at riding, we took a cab out to the Pyramids. I have a photo of where I went for lunch to upload, so I won't spoil the surpise. We bought our tickets and went inside and straight away the guy I think of as the "wallet inspector" asked for our tickets and started powering away. He got really upset when I asked for them back: "what? you think we think that you are all millionaires and are after your money?" Pretty funny for a guy that was after our money.

The funniest trick the touts have is saying "Hey my friend you look Egyptian" and then they cram stuff in your arms then ask for money. After a while you get used to it and just laugh at them, but between those guys, the trash and the wallet inspector it really took shine off. The pyramids aren't a museum as much as a game preserve where the touts can hunt fat, waddling tourists.

In a proper country, I could have taken a helicopter around the pyramids and been back at the hotel to lounge around the pool. At least there is a sound and light show, so I will be able to rock out to Thunderstruck, Skyfire style.

Cairo Town

2010-01-10T02:40:00.000-08:00

Kilometers riden: 0

Cairo is where I am at. Not sure really what to say about it. All the blogger.com controls are in (I guess) Arabic. All I've managed to do is apply for my Sudanese visa. They don't have lines or whatnot over here, kind of like they don't have traffic lights or lane marking (that get paid attention). The guy right behind me must have really liked me, because he was really keen on dry humping me the whole time we were in the line.

I think that crossing roads here is going to be one of those things where you think "Hmm, I am getting pretty good at thi-" and then you get hit by a taxi.

Etihad was actually a way better experience than I thought it would be. I got put in an aisle exit row. Food was pretty good. I missed out on an ice-cream though. I watched the first 90 seconds of "Gamer" on the flight. I was way too embarrassed to watch the whole thing while people could see me watching it (remembering the time I could see a guy rewinding the risque parts of Loius and the Brothel on a plane) but it looks awesome, so I will definitely have to catch up on it later.

No photos because I haven't unpacked my 1,000,000 zip lock bags. Apparently Cairo is a world leader in pyramid technology, so I will take my camera along to that. I'm sure that no-one has seen any photos of that before.

Hobo Style Well Wishes

2010-01-08T03:22:00.001-08:00

Ben has provided this helpful translation for people less hobolike than him: http://www.northbankfred.com/illus4.jpg

Hurty McFlaggy was the mooted name for my bike. Given the lack of flag and southern cross stickers, Hurty McNotFlaggy it will have to be.

Thanks Ben!

Traditional Victory Meal

2010-01-07T18:16:00.001-08:00

Kilometers riden: Still 0.

Since I have almost finished getting all my stuff together, I figured that my last victory meal (for a while) was in order. Plus, I need to test posting photos. Makes a change from the normal shoe portrait.

I normally only have this meal when I have written some code that works or something equally uncommon.

Healthy and nutritious.

Really makes me look forward to the other traditional victory meal: airport Hungry Jacks.

Nimble Vagrant Active

2010-01-07T17:30:00.000-08:00

Kilometers riden: 0.0.

I think that I am actually almost ready to roll out.

The only thing that I am missing is a Southern Cross sticker for my bike. I had figured that everyone loves Australians. Some people tell me that this might not be 100% true though, so it might be just as well that I didn't get that sticker.

Oh yeah, the other thing that happened is that I ended up with an extra pair of knicks and a missing pair of bibs. Not so annoying, and might even make things easier when I inevitably get gastro.

I got around to testing the fancy luggage lock I got for my locker on the Tour. It had some picture instructions for how to set the combination. Turns out, it was way too complicated for me. I got to the last step where the hasp was meant to lock down and it just wouldn't go down. I raged out and tried locking it down with a hammer. The inside of the lock was quite interesting.

That is the sort of calm thinking that will minimise fuss and maximise enjoyment. Don't worry, I am not packing a hammer.

Right now, I am 102kg (thanks Pecan Pies), so I should have plenty of fat to chew through and last the distance.

For those that need it, here are the latest contact information for the Tour guys:

By Phone
Toronto Office: +1 416 364 8255 (between 10am and 6pm EST)
South Africa Office: +27 84 353 1975 (between 2am and 10am EST)

By Twitter:
Twitter is a web based service that allows users to send short, 140 character, messages to each other via SMS (text) and the web. For TdA, using twitter will allow us to send 5 -10 short updates each day from the tour. Family and friends of riders can follow these updates and even reply via twitter. To receive updates you must have a twitter account and follow us at http://twitter.com/tdalive. More info below on Twitter.