Snacks

One thing that I have only mentioned in passing is snacks. This subject is so important in North Africa that it deserves more than a Camping Tip. When you are on a bush camp or desert camp or any camp with less than a market nearby (which is most days before Kenya) the only way to get a sugary snack is to bring it with you. TDA provides heaps of really good food - but none of it is a snack. And if you are big and hungry there can be a long time between your bowls of soup and dinner. The thing to do is to find a good supermarket (not so super outside the capital cities) and buy ten times as much as you think that you can eat. I pretty rarely eat chocolate at home, but over here, all bets are off (Africa == Drunkeness). The picture is what I would consider an adequate supply for a normal six day gap between towns.

Pro tip: form a group of people to swap snacks with. Variety is the spice of life.

Day Five - Mike Savage Safari Camp to Nairobi

Distance: 136.50km
Ride time: 6:37
Climb: 1606m

Non-race day. Yay.

I was kind of surprised to find out that we had 1600m of climb for the day. And that there was a convoy half-way through the day.

To avoid the fast people having to wait for _all_ the slow people to turn up at the convoy start, there were going to be three convoys. The first 15 would head off with Chris, the mechanic, and probably make good time. Each subsequent group would be slower and have to wait longer to get going. That meant that for a non-race day there was a bit of pressure to still make good time up the hills. I wasn't really too keen on this, what with the stomach cramps and all. Instead, I set off pretty early and tried to get a head start. Even so, it was only a couple of hills before Stuart and Gizi caught up to me.

I would have been happy to ride by myself. I think that I could have gone an easy, comfortable pace and still made the first convoy. Gizi figured that we might as well ride as a group though - being a non-race day and all. This meant that I had to ride a bit faster than I felt good at and Stuart and to ride a bit slower. Oh well.

We made it to the lunch stop and convoy start with plenty of time to spare. Enough time to chow down on some really nice honeydew melon and eat a mango. Then I got some Africa cold cokes and we had those. I think that this was my fatal mistake.

By the end of the convoy (only one flat: Jethro, and one broken bike: Marcel) I was feeling pretty terrible. For about five minutes I would feel strong and could power along. Then I'd have cold sweats and stomach cramps for the next 20 minutes. Not ideal for riding up heaps of hills (the outskirts of Nairobi are pretty hilly) and through a lot of traffic.

Apart from the cramps, it was a pretty nice day of riding. We had a sweet section of dual carriageway before lunch that was packed with real rollers. Could fall out of the sky like a fiery meteorite (well it feels like that to me), wait until the speed dropped below 50 then power back up the next hill. Some of them were just the right size to stay in my hardest gear all the way to the top. Others I had to spin a bit. They were all fun though.

Even the cramp inducing, heavily trafficked hills on the outskirts of Nairobi were pretty nice. Plenty of views across the suburbs and hills.

I even saw a car coming down a hill get massively sideways, locking up all four wheels. I'm not sure what they were trying to do, but heaps of the Kenyan drivers are pretty keen overtakers. It wouldn't surprise me if they had just had to emergency brake before they flew through the safety barrier and sailed into space.

Rod's Camping Tip: Bring earplugs. When the party is still going at 2am or the person next to you is letting them rip - you will definitely want them. Pro tip: good airlines will give you free ones on your flight over. Etihad will even give you a nice soft case with your airplane socks, eye mask and ear plugs.

Day Four - Nanyuki to Mike Savage Safari Camp

Distance: 103.58km
Ride time: ~4hrs
Climb: 592m (but descended 1397m)

"Oh my god. Now I understand what we are doing." - Gizi

So today started out as a pretty sweet ride. Rolling hills with a serious downwards trend. I was definitely feeling the effects of a couple of good nights sleep. We started off riding to the equator. Well, to a sign that said it was on the equator. Our GPSs had a different story. Anyway, pictures were taken. If I had my act together, I would post one. I don't though, so just imagine a birdlike stick figure with a giant head covered in half shaved stubble. Standing below a peeling sign proclaiming one to be on the equator.

Back to the riding. Sweet indeed. We were ripping along at an awesome pace. I was feeling super strong on the hills, carrying plenty of speed into the bases and pushing up to the top. Then my chain wrapped itself around my spokes. That's cool, just takes some time to slip the chain off and put it back on. While half the people we just smashed by ride on past. Off again on the chase. Then my chain slips off the front chain ring as I stood to pedal. Foot comes off the pedal and hits the ground. Ouch. Back off the bike. Send Stuart and Gizzy on ahead. Fix bike. Start riding again. Have to take it easy in case chain comes off again. It does.

There was a bit of a climb to lunch, but it was definitely worth it. There was a crate of mangoes waiting to be eaten and I was on a forced slow day, so pretty awesome.

Two delicious mangoes later (I know how to peel and eat them well after helping in the kitchen so much) I was on my way. Still pretty fast day, even taking care of my chain. At one point near the end, I got stuck behind a semi doing around 35km/hr. This was just slightly too slow for me on a -1% grade. I waited for a clear stretch of road then started my over taking move. A semi is much longer than it seems from behind. I got about halfway along and felt myself slipping, so I let out a massive hulk roar, literally yelling as loud as I could and pushed past before the oncoming traffic got too close. That truck ended up being within 200m of me the whole rest of the ride, like something out of Terminator 2.

Camp was super sweet. It was 2km down a dirt road on the banks of the Tana river. It was at a safari camp, so it had amenities, including a bar with Africa cold cokes. The best bit was that we could go white water rafting. I was a bit hesitant at first, because I can't really swim.

Turns out that they have special white helmets for people like me that can't swim, so they know who to fish out first.

The rafting was really, really good. With all the rain that we rode through, the water was really high. We got to do some Grade 4 / 4+ (they rate them themselves though) and mucked around a bit. We kept trying to ride the standing wave at the bottom of one rapid. Gizi got thrown out on the first two attempts, then me on the next. On the final go, we flipped the whole raft and all ended up in the drink. Then we did this thing where we climbed onto a rock next to the rapid and jumped in. Pretty neat. Because our guide spoke really fast English, Gizi didn't really understand what we were doing until it was too late to chicken out. Hence the quote. It was cool though.

The best thing was: at first, falling in seemed like a freaking catastrophe. By the end though (when we flipped out going doing the last big rapid backwards) it just seemed like normal. I guess that I am used to it now.

Day Four - Isiolo to Nanyuki

Distance: 70.58km
Ride time: 4:28 (includes french toast eating time)
Climb: 1417

So. Today was pretty funny. I was still feeling and looking like a very sick thing. I had started Cipro the night before though and I was already feeling heaps better. It is like some sort of magic drug.

I guess I was looking bad enough that Gizzy thought I might loose EFI that day, so she decided to ride along for moral support. If anyone has ever had me give them moral support, you'd have a good idea how Gizzy does it. Basically she rides alongside either laughing at how slow you are going or not letting you stop. At one point into the massive 40km climb, I really wanted to take off my rain jacket because I was too hot. I got to the point of stopping one point unclipped when Gizzy said "I think that we can make a break at the T-junction". That junction was another 6km up the road. When we got there, as well as taking off my jacket I took a drink of electrolyte drink. Gizzy: "What are we going to stop for a picnic here?"

Pretty funny stuff.

Eventually we made it to the top of the climb. I tested the limits of Cipro drinking a whole bunch of different types of juice. Delicious, delicious juice. Not the reconstituted powder juice we could buy before, but proper juice in little cartons. I should say that Ethiopia had good juice though - mango, pineapple and avocado. So thick that you have to eat it with a spoon.

The good news was that I didn't give up on the ride, even when I was going 6km an hour. The even better news was that it was french toast for lunch. The best news was that we were camping at a hotel next to a British Army base. It was a proper hotel that knew how to make food and had electricity (almost all the time). The room was so big, we watched Always Sunny in Philadelphia in style while writing blogs and doing email. Civilisation is grand.

Plus, with Cipro I can eat again - so I had a mixed grill, a homemade coke spider (order vanilla icecream and a coke) and then we had awesome sausage and pasta salad for normal, TDA dinner. Excellent stuff.

Cipro and being ridiculed by a tiny little German definitely got me through the day. Gizzy was so hyper from laughing at me by the end that she was like a little crazy person. Frightening stuff.

Day Three - Highway Camp to Isiolo

Distance: 81.16km
Ride time: 3:44

So, I set out with high hopes for the day. The prospect of only six or seven ks of dirt until sweet pavement practically had my heart racing.

I started out pretty slowly - rolling along looking at stuff. Once we hit the sweet, sweet pavement though, I felt like going faster. I only stopped to look at this thing. It looked like a massive rock ship rotating out of the fog.



The rest of the day was pretty easy. Still feeling weak and pushing my massive tires didn't seem like fun, but it was nice to not be grovelling along. Made it to camp in pretty good time, so I had plenty of time to get a room for the night. I also spent a lot of time trying to get my bike clean. This was harder than it sounds when it is that muddy. Here is a pic of my bike during the muddy day.



It got even muddier than this on the next day. Crazy muddy.

With the sickness, I was pretty unenthusiastic about the whole cleaning bikes and changing tires things. I did a pretty shitty job of it, then just put my bike in the rain. I did put my Duranos on for the upcoming pavement. Then one of the tires blew up. So I called in one of the many tire changes I have done for other people and had them change it for me. Sweet.

The room was pretty good. The electricity came on and off, but the shower and toilet worked. It was probably the best nights sleep I have had all tour as well. Seven straight hours. Sweet. At 2230, they put the music on quietly in the bar. That was all good. But they also put the music on really loudly in the garden, right next to the rooms. I left it until I was good and mad at 2300 then went down to get them to turn it off. Or down. Or something. Long story short, I let loose the anger monster on those guys.

Dan's Camping Tip: Why camp when you can sleep under a mosquito net in a warm dry room.

Day Two - Field Camp to Highway Camp

Distance: 87.65km
Ride time: 7:05
Climb: 625m

This was a pretty grinding day. I woke up after a couple of hours of sleep to find out that it was raining. I decided to wait it out and see if it stopped, but by the time I absolutely, positively had to get up it was raining even harder. Plus, everyone was already up and standing around the truck so they got to watch my inept attempt at a rain takedown of my tent. It was not a resounding success.

Anyway, no breakfast then on the bikes. Sand and corrugations where the order for the day. This wasn't too bad. For the first 300m. Then I hit the real bad roads. The bad roads, constant incline and rain made for a pretty miserable time on the bike. Since we were going uphill, the best place to ride was often the stream of rain water coming down the hill. Needless to say, our bikes are pretty knackered now. I've also got Ethiopian Shitting Sickness, so I was off the bike pretty often. Stripping off the jersey and bibs in the rain and sand is an unforgettable experience.

Eventually I caught up with some riders going as slow as me. This was kind of good, because I got some company riding along at the glacial pace I was going. And it wasn't people that I would normally talk to. First Dana, who has some pretty well thought out plans for post-ride life. Then Steph, who was as angry as usual, but has some good stories.

The riding got a bit better after lunch. The Chinese are busy building the road from Isiolo out to Marsabit. We had about 20km of not quite road, but built up road bed and newish detour roads. This was awesome. Instead of sand and corrugations. We had hard pack with massive puddles. Deep enough to come up to our knees as we rode through. Did I mention that our bikes are screwed?

Finally, after a very long day, we made it to the camp on the side of the new highway. Because of all the rain, it was pretty muddy everywhere. The quick guys had managed to grab a shower with the water collected in the tarp. Slow pokes like me had to make do with washing down using muddy water out of puddles on the road. Being in Africa for this long is a bit like being drunk - you are going to do things and eat things that you normally wouldn't do.

The campground was pretty spectactular. We had views from the escarpment we were on across the plain to the next set of hills. Really cool.

In rider meeting, we were told that we had 25-30km of unpaved (but under construction) road until the pavement. This would have been ok. Then, whlie we were sitting around talking crap, some honkies in a 4wd pulled up to say hello. They told us that there was only six or seven kilometres to go. I didn't want to get my hopes up, but this sounded sweet.

Dan's Camping Tip: When you are doing a rain take down, you don't have to methodically fold up your poles while your tent inner gets soaked on the muddy ground. Unless you are the bumbling comedy relief for the tour. Then go ahead.

Day One - Marsabit to Field Camp

Distance: 95.3km
Ride time: 6:23

So, this ride was pretty nice. I am still slow as all get up. Between the cold and a bunch of niggles, I can't generate much power in my legs. This has been pretty good practice for high cadence riding. Well, higher than my usual stomping mash.

We had a tiny bit of climbing on the wet dirt roads (I forgot to say that it rained pretty heavily the night before) then headed all the way downhill to lunch at 55km.

This wasn't totally straightforwards though. There are still plenty of corrugations (no lava rocks though) and the mud was out of this world. On some of the uphills, I had to scoot along - the mix of wet mud and cow crap
was so slippery that I couldn't spin my way up. In other places, my fat tires didn't have enough frame clearance to shed mud fast enough. I had to get off a bunch of times and push mud out with my fingers to be able to turn the wheels again. I thought that the Gravity 12hour was bad that one year, but this was something else again. If a few big trucks hadn't gone through and squished a lot of the mud out of the way, the road would have been impassable. With a clear path though, it made the riding pretty fun.

It actually felt a bit like proper mountain biking, picking a nice path and maintaining traction. I should say, trying to maintain traction though - at one point I had to made an impromptu dismount off my bike. It was pretty sweet though. Something has loosened my too tight pedals, so I unclipped and jumped sideways off my bike like a freaking ballerina. The sort of thing that I couldn't do if I tried.

Straight out of lunch, I came across a sorry sight. A massive water hole in the road with two bogged trucks. One of them was the normal cattle trucks that we see charging up and down the road, loaded with people in the back. This was being pushed out by an army of Kenyan dudes. The other was the old dinner truck (since replaced) heading back from Gondor to Nairobi. It looked well stuck, the front wheels dangling in water (I guess - water here is nice and muddy) and the fuel tanks resting on a rock. No one pushing that sucker.

Our three trucks made it here ok though. According to Ferdi, the driving was "fun".

I saw the Spanish girls in their impractical, free van on the muddy road. I thought that they had stopped to take photos (of me looking stylish, naturally) but it turns out that they were just broken down. Again. Luckily for them, one of the TDA staffers has developed a bit of a soft spot for them. He rides along behind the van. If there is a hard section to drive, he does it for them. If they break down, he helps out. Pretty cute stuff.

Dan's Camping Tip: If you put your tent up early in a big open space, a corollary of Murpy's Law says that the loudest snorers, smelliest farters and most unrelenting whiners will camp around you.